ᒪIᗷᖇᗩᖇY ᖇᗴᐯIᗴᗯՏ 2.0

🔖 The Wings Of Storm

Author : draphy

Reviewer : Ouryoaie

• COVER : 10/10

After reading the blurb, I loved how the cover fits and it's simply exquisite. From the image to the fonts, your cover is really pleasing and is actually fitting of a story of its genre. The way you related it to something within the plot was very good too.

• TITLE : 10/10

The title seems perfect from what I read, especially signifying what the story is about.

• BLURB : 10/10

How do I put this . . . your blurb is pretty amazing. Not only did it mention exactly what the story was about, it also showed its uniqueness. Let's just say I personally haven't come across a story like this. Your blurb brought out the beauty of it book and coupled with the cover, it's definitely something fantasy or adventure lovers would want to read.

• CREATIVITY : 10/10

The story line was one thing, but your narration was another thing. It was really beautiful especially with the way you started it, going straight to the point. The choices of words used were also well placed and it is an ideal attention grabber. I especially like your detailed descriptions and how they made the story come alive.

• PLOT : 15/15

From what I read, the plot is just beautiful and the aspect of the character existing in different worlds at the same time is a brilliant story line. Your writing was also a factor in bringing out the beauty of the plot.

• CHARACTERS : 10/10

You did well in fleshing out your characters and I could especially relate to Tahro a few paragraphs into the story. Even without meeting his mother yet, I could already envision her character. I also like the way you portrayed Tahro's behaviour typical to that of a ten year old. Your characters were realistic and that is appreciated.

• GRAMMAR : 14/15

You wrote very well and I could barely find any grammatical errors. Though, I have a suggestion. You are meant to put each thoughts by the character in a paragraph of its own, writing them in italics is not exactly enough.
Apart from that, I couldn't really find any other issues with your grammar and the story had a really good flow. Though, there was something a user pointed out about the last line of your chapter and I'm not sure if I can agree or disagree. It would be something else if you mentioned;
Today was when the first grain fell.
That was the day the first grain fell.
Hmm, thinking back, maybe he had a point but I'm still not entirely sure.

• COMMUNICATION : 5/5
(With Readers)

• OVERALL IMPRESSION : 15/15

The story is simply beautiful and something I would look forward to finishing when I have the time. I really liked the air of mystery your book contained and it gave me exciting expectations of the adventures he was going to partake in in that other world.
I also liked how you focused also on the relationship with his parents. The story was easy to read and understand and the emotions of your characters were well expressed. Most times while I was reading, it felt like I was there with the main character.
One thing though is that you should break your sentences. For example, in the first sentence of the second chapter, there was an appropriate place you could have used a full stop so the pacing wouldn't come out slow.
Over the next couple of days, I read the volume. Not one, not two, but five times.
I included the full stop there, but it's an opinion you can choose to take or just disregard. Nevertheless, you wrote a beautiful story.

• TOTAL : 99/100