Sanders Sides Onshots Book 2 {COMPLETED}

Genderfluid Patton (LAMP) {fluff}

What's this? Three in one day? Oof I've been on a writing streak today! Whoop.

T.W. Nothing much, I don't think anything is triggering.

Patton grinned and skipped through the mind, it was a good day, and he was happy. He'd been up a lot of the night, trying to figure out who he was, but he wouldn't let the other sides, his boyfriends, know that. They cared for him too much, and if they knew he'd been up all night, they wouldn't be best pleased, and Patton didn't want to cause any issues, not after how bad of day he'd day the day before.

He hadn't meant to cause any issues, but when he had multiple days where he didn't feel happy as himself, and then other days were he was perfectly content, he didn't know how to handle any of it.

He made it to the commons, and smiled when he saw Virgil sat alone. He walked over, and sat next to his angsty boyfriend, happy when he leaned over, and wrapped an arm around Patton's waist.

"Virge?" Patton looked over at him, noticing he put his phone down, and looked back at him.

"Yeah?

"I don't understand things." A frown tugged at Patton's lips, and it took all Virgil had not to kiss away the frown.

"What kind of things?" Virgil's grip around Patton tightened ever so slightly, and Patton almost melted. He loved when Virgil was affectionate, it didn't happen often, and it always made him feel better, somehow.

"I don't know. That's the thing. I want to understand. But I can't."

"Can you describe it?"

Patton smiled sadly, and fought the urge to run away and hide, pretending the conversation never happened. He didn't want to lose them, or have them think any differently of him. Of course he still didn't know who he was, or what was going on in his head, but he hoped someone could tell him which way to go from here.

"Some days I wake up and I feel so good in myself, and then other days I want to cry and never leave my bed, because I hate everything. I look at myself, and I wonder why I am the way I am. Like I shouldn't be me. But I don't know why. I don't understand it, and I just want to know who I am." Paton's eyes filled with tears, and he looked away from Virgil, not wanting him to see him cry.

Before Virgil could reply, Roman walked into the room, and sat the other side of Patton, clearly noticing his distress, and pulling him into a hug, making it a Patton Sandwich.

Patton sniffled, and looked at Virgil, who was trying to figure out what to say, but didn't know the way to say it, and then turned to Roman, who just wanted to make sure Patton was okay. He didn't know how much Roman had heard, but he didn't mind, he enjoyed the cuddles he was getting.

"Pat, I think you need to take a few quizzes online, look at the questions, and maybe figure out the answer for yourself, after some research." Roman spoke up.

"But I don't even know where to start."

"Look up genderfluid, and go from there." Virgil answered him, and Patton nodded, pressing a kiss to both of his boyfriends lips before going back to his room, unsure of what he got himself into, he just hoped it would be okay.

He sat at his desk, and opened his computer, pulling up a Google tab. He typed in 'Genderfluid' and it took him a few moments to actually hit enter, and see what it was Virgil had suggested he look at.

The first thing that came up was the definition 'relating to a person who does not identify themselves as having a fixed gender'. He frowned. That seemed to relate to him. He continued down the google search, and found more and more websites, all telling him similar things. 'A person who is genderfluid prefers to remain flexible about their gender identity rather than committing to a single gender. They may fluctuate between genders or express multiple genders at the same time.'