How amazing is that picture! I'm not sure who drew it but it's just great!
Civil war started but was talked out like rational adults. No Infinity War. No Thor: Ragnarok. The Avengers know who Spiderman is.
Warning ⚠️: Drinking.
Ships: No ships just people being insane.
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It was the first Saturday of March when Tony decided that he was bored. Bored of board game night to be exact. Instead Loki, Peter and the Avengers decided they were going to 'party it up' as Steve had put it.The first game was Never Have I Ever... with shots.
Peter, of course, decided to have chocolate milk instead of the alcohol that the others got.
Natasha went first. "Never have I ever... dressed up in drag."
Peter, Steve and Clint took a shot with a smirk while everyone looked at Loki expectedly. "I'm gender fluid, not a drag queen!" Loki exclaimed with a glare.
Peter went next. "Never have I ever... gotten drunk." Everyone but him took a shot, Tony taking multiple.
Bruce nervously went after Peter. "Never have I ever... purposefully blown something up." Once again everyone took a shot, most now looking at Peter.
"A few weeks ago I didn't have time to finish my English essay so I blew something small up in one of the empty science classrooms so that it set off the fire alarm." The Avengers looked alarmed at what the teenager had said but continued playing anyway.
After 56 rounds, 23 bottles of vodka, 16 bottles of whisky and 12 cartons of chocolate milk, the group where all pretty drunk. Peter, who was not drunk, had drunken more sugar in the last hour then a grown man should have in 6 months so he had a major sugar high.
"Let's play the truths of the dares!" Shouted a tipsy Thor, getting agreements from them all. I won't go into detail but by 10 o'clock everyone looked horrible.
Tony was wearing fishnet stockings, hot pink short shorts, a black tub top and high heels.
Clint was dressed in a Donald Duck costume that was 2 sizes too small.
Wanda had on a fake moustaches, yellow flip flops, a garbage bag dress and a neon orange belt.
Thor and Loki were both wearing Disney Princess dresses, Thor as Sleeping Beauty and Loki as Cinderella.
Bucky's hair was braided with hot pink implants, he wore a tiny pink maxi dress, lipstick and boots.
Natasha had Pretzels woven into her hair, makeup smeared all over her face and held a sparkly purple walking stick.
Vision was dressed in neon 80's girls clothes, a blonde wig and a bright green bow.
Bruce had on a belly top, short shorts, crocs and black lipstick.
Steve couldn't have looked more patriotic wearing a shiny blue, red and white jacket, shirt, cowboy boots and booty shorts, all America themed.
Peter was dressed in a sparkly, rainbow unicorn onesie and bright red high heels.
The group stood in the large, almost empty parking lot and grinned. What parking lot might you be asking? Well the Walmart parking lot.
Yes, the 2 Disney Princess, 4 cross dressing superhero's, 2 scary females, Donald Duck and a unicorn, were going to Walmart.
"Come on friends! I must find the wall Martian, eye of the hawk told me about!" Thor announced, bouncing like a child.
"Yeah!" Peter screamed as he shook from the sugar high.
A very drunk Tony snickered and said "He would do that for anything, watch this. Hey Peter! Are you ready to take over the world!"
"Yeah!" Peter screamed once again.
The group walked inside and split up, Loki grumbling about how 'blue isn't my colour'.
Tony with Bruce.
Natasha with Peter and Clint.
Bucky with Loki.
Steve with Thor.
Wanda with Vision.
Tony and Bruce took up residence in the toilet paper isle, quite literally. The two supposed geniuses decided to build a toilet paper fort.
Somehow it was 3 stories tall with a working drawbridge, working lights and a computer that showed what was on the security cameras. All 4 of those things should have been impossible because it was completely made out of toilet paper.
A few feet away from the geniuses, Wanda, Vision and a bored employee that they convinced to help, were trying to flush strange stuff down the toilets. They had flushed a large red rubber ball, a packet of tooth brushes, a toy fish, another toy fish, a bag of marshmallows and a pineapple.
Loki and Bucky were playing hide and seek in the women's clothing section, getting confused and worried looks from a stressed looking 40 year old lady.
Steve and Thor on the other hand, were stalking a freaked out, most likely high, employee. Every now and again they would mumble "it's an alien" under their breathes while squinting at him. The boy decided to start hiding in random places then speed walk away when he was found.
It was a funny and weird sight to see a teenage boy running from a god in a princess dress and a guy that liked America way too much.
On the opposite side of the Store Natasha and Clint were racing on kiddie bikes while Peter sat on top of a really high shelf. The teenage boy was eating his 27th chocolate fudge Kit Kat while sobbing.
"Jenifer! I didn't mean to kill you!" He cried as he looked at the barbie doll laying on the floor a couple meters down.
After about 10 minutes of being overly emotional, Peter jumped off the shelf and decided he was bored. That's how he wound up at the pet section, with an army of cats.
He had Coco, Whiskers, Bubbles, Dog Food, Chew Toy and Tomato following him as he screamed "Charge!" And chased after random people.
Loki and Bucky decided to join Peter in his chase, abandoning the freaked out employee. Then Nat and Clint did as well. Soon all the Avengers had teamed up and ran out all the other customers.
Happy with their work, the group decided to grab a few things and leave. The things they got included:
-10 loaves of bread
-pop tarts
-a pregnancy work out video
-the body of Jenifer
-a goldfish in a plastic bag
-a bottle of milkAs they walked back to the tower, completely forgetting about the cars, Peter handed the goldfish to a businessman, kissed the man on the cheek and said "Goodbye my love."
The sad part is that, that wasn't the strangest thing to happen in that Walmart. Or to that businessman.
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