Crazy Super-Gay Peter Parker One-shots

Just The Tatt-Two Of Us

I told my mum about this one-shot book and she posted about it on Facebook! Do any of you know how embarrassing it is knowing that everybody you have ever met knows about you writing and reading FanFictions? I hope not because it's horrible!

I've seen a bunch of one-shots where Peter has very serious, emotionally driven tattoos, so I took this request from @Sg62503 as an opportunity to write this strange and funny nonsense.

Ships: Spideypool, Shurichelle, IronStrange, Maytasha (May x Natasha)

Warnings: Swearing

Information for the chapter: Aunt May is still alive but she gave Stephen and Tony permission to adopt Peter.

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It all started with a smoke alarm and a sleepy Peter Parker-Stark-Strange.

Stumbling through the strangely clean halls, Peter made his way into towards the source of the horrific beeping noise, aka the kitchen.

In said kitchen were two people who never ever should have been allowed to cook. Tony and Stephen Stark-Strange were both so horrible at cooking that Gordon Ramsey refused to eat their food, and Gordon has probably eaten sushi from almost every gas station in Nebraska.

"Morning kid, would you mind grabbing the blender out for me?" Tony asked, dicing a dozen or so bananas into tiny pieces.

Peter mumbled a sleepy 'whatever' before leaning over to grab out the machine from a bottom cupboard. As he rummaged around the cupboard, his shirt rode up slightly, revealing a the bottom of a tattoo.

"Peter," Stephen said slowly, "what in the actual fuckity fuck is that?"

His adoptive parents were staring at him with wide eyes, both unsure if what they had just seen was a tattoo or just a trick of the light.

"A blender?" Peter answered in confusion, cradling the blender like a small child as he stood up.

"Not that, the tattoo!" Tony exclaimed, taking the blender away from a nervous Peter.

Peter winced. "Well a couple weeks ago I got very drunk with MJ, Ned, Wade, and Shuri and we kinda got tattoos."

"First of all how? You're 16! Secondly, tattoos? As in multiple?!" Stephen cried, his face turning white.

"Uh, yeah, I guess. The details from that night are all really hazy, but I'll show you my favourite tattoo." Peter said, lifting up the back of his shirt. The room developed into silence as they stared at Peter's back.

"Peter, why do you have a tattoo of Donald Trump and Bucky making out?" Tony asked, trying to hide his amusement.

Peter turned around and blinked at his adoptive father. "Are you telling me that you don't ship Ducky?"

Giggles escaped Tony's throat, which he attempted to hide behind his hand. Stephen simply walked out of the room, deciding to just let Tony deal with it.

"This is so hilarious that I can't even be angry at you for getting a tattoo." Tony said between giggles before walking out of the room to compose himself, abandoning his bananas.

Peter shrugged his shoulders and also left the room, going back to his bedroom in order to get ready for school.

The brunette teen was an excited mess seeing since his Aunt May and Aunt Nat, who had married a couple months back, were coming to the tower with the rest of his superhuman family.