Crazy Super-Gay Peter Parker One-shots

Young Peter Pt 3 of 3

Warnings: None-eth of eths.

Ships: Stucky, IronStrange, BlackPepper (NatashaxPepper)

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Thor, Loki and Peter were sitting on the very expensive living room couch of Stark tower. The three of them were extremely bored and deciding to just wait for dinner seemed to make it worse.

Loki was cuddling one of his multiple knives, this one seemed to be much sharper then the rest, while Thor stroked his pop tart box lovingly.

"Oh knifey, you while never know how much I love you." Loki cooed as Peter watched in silence.

"Tarts of pop, I will love you until the day I visit Hel." Thor made goo-goo eyes at the box.

The six year old blinked and opened his mouth to speak. "Your affection for inanimate objects scares me."

The gods looked at him confused, unsure what he meant.

"Knifey isn't an object, he has feelings!" Loki exclaimed, clutching the weapon like a baby.

Peter nodded as if he understood what the god of mischief said. He did not.

"I agree with Brother Loki. My tart of pops have all of the emotions!" Thor shouted, holding the sides of the box is if he was covering the cardboards ears.

Peter shook his head and went quiet as he left the room. He purposefully avoided the Asgardians for a while after that.

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The table was quiet as Peter evaluated the food that Vision served him. It was well known to, well, everyone, that Peter was a massive food critic.

Even though Vision physically shouldn't have been able to sweat that didn't stop a bead of it to run down his face.

Peter took one small bite of the mac and cheese, thinking intently as he stared at the bowl.

Steve nervously clutched Bucky's hand as the Avengers watched the dramatic scene.

After Peter had swallowed the pasta he took a sip of water before trying one of the french fries.

Peter raised an eyebrow at the android, looking from him to the dish. "Before I begin we must speak about how you have plated your dishes."

"The mac and cheese has been sloppily poured into the bowl and the herbs that you have placed on top does not make it look better. The chips on the other hand are just a mess. If I was served this at a restaurant I would send it back immediately. Now lets talk about the taste." Peter continued.

The other people in the room held their breath as they waited for the results. "The mac and cheese lacked charisma. The lukewarm french fries were under seasoned. It was a lacklustre dining experience to say the least."

Vision looked down sadly, but Peter wasn't finished.

"But, tonights dinner was better then last nights dinner, meaning that you are getting better and taking my advice. Not many cheffs can do that. Congratulations." Vision looked like he was going to burst into happy tears.

Even though Peter didnt like his food, he had complemented Vision on his efforts, and effort is just as important as talent.

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Happy looked at his Nephew with a small smile. The short brunette was pacing across the living room floor, complaining about his day.

"Can you believe that?!" Peter shouted, looking like an angry kitten.

"I mean come on! Just because I went to that Sunday school to try and convert the young child-eths to my new religion, doesn't mean that I'm against christians!" He exclaimed, making Happy hold back his laughter.

Happy looked at him, now chuckling lightly. "Well at least Ned was there."

"That's the worst part! Only Ned decided to convert to Star-Wars-Ism!" Peter cried sitting on the floor with a pout.

"It's okay, Pete. Look, if it makes you feel better then I can take you out for ice-cream."

"Baskin Robins ice-cream?"

"Sure thing, kid."

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T'Challa looked at his 6 year old sister, then at the 6 year old son of Tony and Stephen.

"Does yours refuse to eat gas station food?" The Black Panther questioned.

Tony and Stephen nodded.

"And try and convert people to their own religion?"

They nodded again.

"And use big words?"

For a third time they nodded.

"Preform weird tests?"

Again, the two superheroes nodded.

T'Challa groaned loudly. "Ugh, there are two of them."