A Chosen Life (Hard Time Series Book 4)

The Check Up

"So Stef it's been more than a year. How have you been feeling?"

"Mmm not bad doc. Better. Some days my memory still acts up but I'm doing better overall." The blonde says sitting restlessly in her neurologist office as it was time for her once a month checkup. "I just wish I didn't need this stupid fucking cane anymore. Like you said it's been over a year and I was hoping I wouldn't need it by now."

"Takes time sometimes Stef. One day you may not. And your stress level? How is that going?"

"Mmm well I try with that as well but with so many kids and grand kids one can only do so much." I laugh as he smiles back. "They like to test me. All of them."

"Oh I'm sure. Have you continued to go to the therapy I suggested, or have you gone at all after that one time?"

"Yeah I mean I went a couple of times. It's just not my thing." She says as the man nods his head in concern knowing the blonde needed it more than she wanted to admit and if Lena knew she wasn't going that would be yet another fight.

"How are you doing with the nicotine cravings?"

"MM I wear the patch. Chew gum. It's a bitch. But I know I have no choice so I try doc. Seems these vapors would take me out faster huh?"

"They can, but here is the thing Stef. I get therapy is not for everyone but I think you should try. It can't...

"Look not for nothing but when I got out of jail I went to that shit. They made us go and it never did shit for me. I'm not a therapy person doc I'm just not. I can handle shit on my own."

"I know you can Stef. But you do have a bit going on. How is Callie?"

"She is ok. I'm not saying she's great but...you know day by day."

"And your relationship with her?"

"Do you do this to all your patients?"

"Do what?"

"Pick their fucking brains." She laughs. "I mean did you see something on my brain scan or some  shit. What am I going to have another stroke?"

"Your scans are fine. How is your short term memory? Still giving you issues?"

"MM not as much. No. But it does happen I won't lie.",

"Sex life?"

"Ha. Pretty fucking good but you didn't answer my question. Do you grill the shit out of all your patients like this or what?" She asks as the doctor can't help but laugh for he knew how Stef was and he knew she was a hard ass. Yet he was also aware she took on the world and that her entire family really seemed to rely on her. Minus her wife who Stef refused to let have even a little bit of control.

"I just want to make sure you are ok. Simple as that. Mrs. Adams Foster worries. Your wife and it's been a rough year for you both and your family and I do care Stef. I'm not just your neurologist. Just so you know."

"Yeah, I know. I appreciate that. But um ....I do have one question."

"Shoot."

"Do you know anything about bipolar. Anything? I just.. Callie is ok but it's, it's not her alot of the time. Still even with her meds it's, she's not the same."

"It's not an easy thing Stef. Most people go undiagnosed for years and every case  is different. I know it's difficult but it requires alot of patience which I know you have for her."

"I do. I just feel like had I not had a stroke she would be ok."

"You can't do that to yourself because you don't know that. Anything could have triggered it.  Not facing her past for one. Listen Stef, Callie has issues you don't even know about that she now facing and dealing with. Things she buried and she just needs to know that you and Lena are there and love her."

"More then life."

"In the meantime she can't get well if you don't. So do me a favor just try the therapy a few times." He says handing the woman the card as Stef can only laugh taking it.

"Man you don't give up do you?"

"Nope. Can't with you."

"Well I appreciate it. Thanks as always."

"You are very welcome Stef."

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LENA POV

"May I sit?" I ask Stef as she is outside enjoying the warm air on our patio. Looking up at me she smiles and stretches her arm out for me to sit on her lap.

"You never need to ask my love. How's your day mm?" She smiles as I can see sadness in her eyes. Gently I stroke her cheek and softly kiss her lips. 

"What's on your mind. I can see it in your eyes." I ask as she softly smiles. "Your doctor visit was ok? MM?"

"Yes it was fine love. I'm fine. He just wants me to go the therapy."

"Ok. Well I don't disagree. But I thought you were going?"

"MM not really." She admits.

"Don't be angry. It's not easy for me to go but I know I should. Your right and he is as well. There is alot going on in our life and in order to remain healthy. and for me to keep my stress level under control I need to go."

"I know this thing with Callie really has your heart breaking baby." I say as I now see tears rolling down her cheeks. She rarely cries in front of me and when she does it kills me every time.

"I just don't know what to do for her. She fought so hard to get custody of baby Stef and ..to get out of jail like us only to loose custody to us? It just doesn't seem far and doesn't make any sense. I don't get it Len. She worked so hard only to have mental illness come in and destroy it. I just, my heart aches for her everyday."

"I know it does baby. I know and I know it doesn't make one bit of sense. But she has us, she has all of us and that's going ot help her. It already has. Can you imagine if she didn't have us? Or if Roxy had not found her that day? Or if baby Stef and Andrew had no where to go. We are a strong family which we have proven to be and we will only get stronger. But tell me when you will stop taking on the world?" I ask gently lifting her chin up and wipe her tears. "Tell me? When will you give me some of the burden."

"I guess it's in my nature."

"Yes much like your daughters. Frankie."

"Ha, don't I know it."

"Speaking of which, Erin is moving." I say as Stef looks at me instantly her face growing worried.

"Where?"

"To Connecticut. She has family there and you can guess Frankie is feeling pretty devastated."

"Jesus." She says running her fingers through her hair.

"She's ok I spoke to her honey but, she is crushed."

"I'll talk to her. And um, Roxy invited me to the bakery she works at. Wanna go?"

"Oh nice! Nope. You two need your time. But I'll be here when you get back and we can talk to Noah?"

"Oh most certainly." She smile as I lean in and softly kiss her warm lips.