it's you, it's always been you

chapter 16

Sam and Deena looked at each other with their mouths agape. Sam never heard her mom mention moving to Sunnyvale. But she knew that the divorce was going to happen all these years, she just waited until her parents finally had enough of each other.

It had never felt like a family to Sam. Well, she didn't know what a family felt like since it was so fractured in her home.

It's been years since they had a dinner with each of them sitting at the same table. Even her dad worked every holiday this past year.

Which is why Sam always ended up at the Johnsons for most holidays. While her mother was at some fancy party that she used to drag Sam to. Her mother was only concerned about how she looked to people, her reputation. And Sam despised it.

"Would you quit it, Joan! You heard what the doctors just said about Sam. Our daughter!" Now Sam's dad matched her mom's voice. Which made Sam flinch, and Deena looked between the Fraser family, uncertain how to help Sam.

"You make things worse, Eric! Why don't you go to the golf course or to your secretary's place?!" Joan turned towards Eric.

Deena could see the nurses and even other patients' families stare at Sam's parents as they fought.

Sam was in awe of her dad, he never stood up for Sam, even when her mom said awful things to Sam, and told Sam not to eat so she could lose weight and she was only 12.

When she was a lot younger, she spent so much time with her father, but then there was a day he just stopped. He stopped hugging her, he stopped paying attention to her, while her mom gave her so much attention in an awful way.

"I'm not going anywhere, Joan. Our daughter has cancer and there's a good chance she could die from it. She's staying here in Shadyside. She's going to keep her friends. She needs as much support as she can get. You're the one that makes it so much worse."

"Look how scared she looks Joan! She's cried enough times because of you. I've been a terrible father for years now, but I'm watching her get sicker everyday, and I need to start fighting for her." Sam's dad finally found the strength to divorce his wife and finally stand up for Sam.

"She almost died because she didn't have the medication, that you had! You knew she missed a dose and you didn't do anything about because you're angry at her for that kid who sexually harassed her! I would kill him if I had the chance, but you believe him, you're own daughter. You're the fucked up one. Get the fuck out." Sam's dad lowered his voice, and as soon as he said that last sentence Joan slapped him across his face.

Sam jumped and gasped when her mother did that. She was honestly speechless and stunned at what her father said. This is the most he's talked in years around her.

For the first time with her parents, Sam had hope that her father cared for her. The way she craved and ached for. She always craved her mother's acceptance.

That's why she let her mother get her ready for homecoming and went to it. She's hurt Sam so much, but she still tried so hard it exhausted her constantly, to get some kind of affection or care from her mother.

Deena saw this in Sam, how desperately she wanted to do good in school, and how she was a cheerleader and absolutely hated to be one. She would see how her mother would force Sam to go out with boys from the church her mother went to.

When Deena's mom was alive, she always hugged Sam when she came over. They would bake together, and Deena would be next to them and watched because she hated baking and hated cooking but she could watch the two of them do it all day long.

Deena's mom treated Sam like another daughter. She would even get Sam gifts for Christmas and for her birthday.

Deena's mom even stood up for Sam to Sam's mother, it didn't work but she tried for Sam. Sam would even play catch with Deena and her dad, this was many years ago, but it was a memory Deena cherished.

Deena's mom even talked to Deena about how she knew Deena wasn't straight, even referring to Deena having a crush on Sam but didn't say Sam's name. Deena's mom told Deena that she accepted her and loved her. Deena cried to her mom when it happened.

That's why she was also patient with Sam, and waited for her to realize that she loves Deena back, and not as a friend. She knew how Sam's mom would react if Sam told her the truth, and it terrified Deena what Sam's mother would do to Sam when she found out. She wouldn't react anything like her mom did.

Deena was stunned just like Sam as she watched Sam's dad fight for Sam. Sam finally getting what she deserved to get from a parent.

She was scared how long it would last, him caring for Sam. But she was grateful he said Sam was staying and keeping her friends.

Sam squeezed Deena's hand, she had a small smile on her face as they looked at each other when Sam's mom walked out of the room.

They all knew that her mom would be back.

Sam started crying, and Deena had tears in her  eyes also, knowing how much this meant to Sam. To have her dad's support and showed he cared.

Sam's dad moved to the other side of the bed, opposite from Deena. "I'm sorry, Sam. I'm so sorry with everything in me. I've been awful and I should've stood up for you more. But it's going to change, okay? You're going to get the best treatment and I'll be here every step of the way. And I'm sure Deena will also." As he got closer, they saw he had tears in his eyes also.

Sam cried harder after Sam's dad spoke, Deena was about to move to hug Sam, when her dad leaned in and did it.

It took a moment for Sam to wrap her arms around her dad, but she did and laid her head on his shoulder as she cried.

Deena was surprised Sam's dad even knew her name. Let alone allowed Deena to be here with Sam also.