it's you, it's always been you

chapter 82

Sam dropped what was in her hands and took the letter. She took out of each piece of the letter. Her and Deena held the two pieces side by side as they read what it said.

"Holy shit.." Deena said and Sam said, "oh my God." At the same time.

"You did it Sam. I knew you would. This is amazing. You did it Sam!" 

Deena wrapped her arms around Sam and kissed her forehead.

Sam was stunned. She was so mad at herself for not getting into NYU and now at the very last minute, she knew she got in.

She was so happy that she did, now that her and Deena could go together.

But she was furious at her mom. She knew that her mom got the letter and threw it away, and lied to her when Sam asked about it.

If it wasn't for Sam turning the corner around the house too quickly, she wouldn't have the letter in the trash.

"She's suck a fucking bitch. I can't let her get away with this." Sam's jaw clenched and nostrils flared, she wanted to scream at her mom, make her hurt like all the times her mom made Sam hurt.

"Sam, she's not worth it. Yes, she is a bitch. She's cruel and pathetic. But we need to go," Deena tried to calm Sam and get them to leave.

"No, she's not getting away with this. This could've totally fucked up our plans." Sam marched to the front door, Deena following right behind, still trying to get Sam to leave.

Sam swung the door open and let it hit the wall behind the door loudly.

Sam went in and found her mom in the kitchen. "You fucking bitch."

Deena was right behind Sam and cringed when Sam spoke. She knew she couldn't stop Sam, but she needed to stay close in case her mom tried to hurt Sam.

"What are you doing here? What did you just call me? I'm your mother. You can't speak to me like that." Sam's mom slammed down what she had in her hands on the table.

"You're the worst person I've ever met. Even worse than Caleb and he shot me! You were supposed to love me. You were the only person in the world that it was mandatory to love me. You are my fucking mom. And you're the most pathetic and evil person that I've ever met! You're not my mom anymore. Right now, your daughter just died. I'm not that scared, hurt, timid girl you raised. I'm strong now. I'm not the coward you wanted me to be so I would let you control me. Your daughter is a fucking lesbian. I know that's the worst thing you think I could be. I am one and I'm with Deena and you can't stop me anymore." Sam was getting louder as she spoke, hot tears just pouring out of her eyes and she didn't even notice.

Sam's moms jaw dropped. She's never seen this side of Sam before. Sam never stood up for herself before. And she was able to control Sam so easily that way.

"You've never loved anyone in your life. You're the coward. You're the one that's terrified and you're so pathetic. Fuck you. I'm never going to see you again." Sam huffed and let Deena take her arm and lead her out the front door.

They were down the steps of the porch when they heard Sam's mom from behind them. "You'll come back Samantha, you always do. You'll get pass this phase she put you in and come running back. I know you better than you know yourself."

Sam turned around quickly to face her mom. "She's not a phase, she's my future wife. You'll regret how you treated me. One day you'll regret everything."

Sam turned, back towards the road, grabbing Deena's hand as she led them to the car.

Sam calmed down as she got in the passengers seat and caught her breath.

"Holy shit, Sam. Are you okay? That was... incredible. Are you okay?" Deena was worried the whole time she watched them fight.

"I'm not okay. I'm so good. I feel so much better after that. I feel lighter." Sam turned towards Deena. "It felt so good to finally tell her that."

"I'm stunned you called me your future wife to your mom. The person who hates me the most."

Sam laughed as she reached over the middle console to hold Deena's face between her hands.

"I'm never going to be ashamed of who I am anymore. I'm never going to feel bad because I love you and you're a girl. My mom made me hate myself and be disgusted with myself for feeling like that. But she was the one that was wrong. She is the one that she be ashamed of herself. And I'm never going to feel ashamed again. You've made me so strong, Deena. I'm completely yours and I'm proud that the world knows it. Especially my mom."

Deena wrapped her arms around Sam. She smiled widely as Sam spoke. She loved every word Sam said. Her words made her feel so loved and so proud of Sam.

"I'm so proud of you Sam. You're amazing. You're so strong even without me. You are. I love you so fucking much. You literally leave me in awe everyday. I love you." Deena kissed Sam, her lips moved slowly with Sam's, both of them enjoying the moment together.

"Fuck!" Sam pulled back as she spoke, "we have to go call NYU before it's too late we have two hours while they are open and we can't call after that."

Deena let go of Sam as she spoke, immediately starting the car and drive towards her house. Her and Sam had a future together. The one Sam wanted and Deena couldn't be more hopeful and excited for their future.