Hate me. (Minsung)

//11//

"so.. wait." felix stared at jisung after he explained everything that happened yesterday with minho and hyunjin.

"this hyunjin kid decided to set up a date with you and minho..?"

and immediately jisung slapped the back of his hand. "DON'T CALL IT THAT. and no! he wanted us to realize we don't know anything about each other, and for us to put everything behind us." jisung sighed, plopping down on felix's bed.

"but why?"

"i dunno. he wants to be my friend and thought it would be easier if me and minho got along. he also said something about not wanting to worry if we fight in class or something."

felix hummed, nodding as if that was reasonable. "makes sense to me." he said, making jisung roll his eyes and sit up.

"you guys are grown now, i think you should put it behind you." felix shrugged, honestly speaking.

but jisung only felt his gut tighten at a memory that flashed through his mind, reminding him of all the not-so-nice encounters he used to have with minho often.

"some of the things he said and did to me cannot be pushed back and forgotten." jisung looked off to the side. "and honestly, some of the things i said can't either."

~~~
•••
it was the day of the tournament.

minho was at the ripe age of ten, finally being old enough to enter in the kendo tournament he'd been working so hard for during these past two and a half years.

and he could barely breathe from excitement.

"mom i can't believe it's today!" he tugged on her arm as she began getting her things to drive her son to the kendo studio a bit earlier to make sure they definitely weren't late.

she chuckled and softly pinched minho's cheek. "i know! i'm so excited to see you win! you've been practicing the most out of all your competitors i've heard." she said, hinting that she's even spoken to minho's teacher.

and the ten year old absolutely brightened at that. "..really? he told you that??" minho only found himself feeling more determined.

he would never say it to his mother, but part of him wanted to win to be recognized. he thought that if maybe he won, the other kids in the studio would want to be his friend.

they would see how skilled and talented he was, and take that as enough drive to speak to him.

and minho could not wait.

when they arrived at the kendo studio, there was still an hour before it officially began. minho was practically vibrating with excitement, looking around at all the other kids he knew he was going to go up against.

during practice minho had been the highest in his class, and he was confident enough to know he was perfectly capable of winning and making his mother proud.

he couldn't stop smiling, and his mother couldn't help but look at him fondly. she hadn't seen minho smile this much before.

"so, tell me. do you think this class has helped you if you ever needed to defend yourself in case of an emergency?" they sat next to each other, and the woman playfully nudged her son who beamed up.

"mhm! yup! i have a powerful swing now. and i know how to hit someone's head, throat, and torso if i need to protect myself. and boxing helped a lot too!!" minho kicked his feet in the chair he was sitting in, watching as they set everything up.

"when i'm old enough for the boxing tournament i wanna participate in that too!" he exclaimed, the buzz inside of him growing stronger by the minute. he'd waited years for today.

"of course you can sweetie. i'm sure you'll win that too." she placed a soft kiss to minho's head, loving every second of her son's passionate spewing.

this continued on until there was about twenty minutes left until the competition began. minho could practically explode with how much he was ready. he finally had the chance to show his mother something he was working hard on.

it was going to be perfect.

or, it should have been perfect.

the moment his mother's phone began ringing, something inside minho told him to stop smiling.

he instantly stared, watching the way his mom checked the contact and how she didn't recognize the number. she pressed accept, bringing the phone to her ear.

and that was all it took for the fire inside minho to extinguish.

a light gasp of horror left his moms lips, as she listened intensely to the other end of the line. "oh my god, where are you now? you're using the house phone..?"

minho stared.

"okay whatever you do sweetie, do not open your room door. stay right where you are, and try not to listen to her hun. i promise you she doesn't mean what she's doing. if she does get inside, you'll have to hang up and call the police, okay? i'll be there to try and calm her down as soon as i can."

minho wanted to cry.

he knew what she was going to say to him.

she looked so upset. her eyes twinkled with guilt and tears that could've been from panic or from the promise she was going to break.

"i.. honey this is really serious. i'll try to be back before it's your turn to compete, i promise i'll be fast. don't worry, okay? i swear i'm going to try my absolute hardest to see you." her hands brushed away the pieces of hair that fell in front of minho's eyes.

he felt the lump rise in his throat.

"i am already so, so proud of you. you've been doing amazing and i know you're going to win." she placed a sweet, yet rushed kiss on the top of minho's head. "i love you so much sweetie. i'll be right back."

and minho watched as she disappeared into the crowd, heading towards the doors and quickly getting in her car.

he stared at that direction even long after she was gone, feeling the absolute gut wrenching feeling consume his insides. he was no longer excited.

because he knew what was going to happen.

the tournament had started not long after this.

and eventually, it was minho's turn to go.

his eyes scanned the crowd as he crouched over the mark on the floor, his opponent doing the same thing in the starting position.

and his hands went loose on the shinai, his fingers feeling numb as his eyes began to sting. the lump hadn't left his throat.

the bamboo sword suddenly feeling like it was the heaviest thing on earth.

and upon hearing the signal that it was time to go against each other, minho felt every ounce of passion and drive drain his body the moment he stood straight.

he looked at his opponent from the few feet apart they were.

without even moving, his eyes fell with tears that went unseen from the protective equipment shielding him. his grip went even looser.

and in two seconds it was all over.

he didn't win.

he didn't even try.