Hate me. (Minsung)

//80//

jisung had never understood his attachment to all the stuffed animals he would collect through few years.

he doesn't understand why he didn't collect something else, like stickers or cool rocks on the ground.

as a child he remembered getting a lot of stuffed animals before his mother had her spiral and before his father left.

on his birthday everyday he would get a new one. it didn't last very long, that tradition.

it was only for the first few years of his life, but he knew this would happen because there was always a "happy birthday" written on the tags of the animal.

written in black ink that was now faded beyond comprehension.

maybe it was because he lost his childhood so aggressively that he couldn't help but grow a fondness for them as an adult.

he knew he couldn't enjoy things other kids had the chance to. he knew that he missed out a lot on things that were a staple in people's childhood.

but part of him couldn't help but feel "fixed" the moment he took out the kind looking cat from the bag.

it would be the biggest one he owned. he never bought himself the big plushies he always wanted as a kid because they were always so expensive.

their prices ranged indecently high and that really sucked, even for an adult.

so that is why he felt a wave of childhood contentment wash over him as he sat with the stuffed animal in his arms. he couldn't get over it.

felix sat down comfortably next to jisung on the couch, two mugs in his small hands and a bright smile on his face.

"here's your hot chocolate." he said, nudging jisung lightly and making him look up.

"oh, thanks." he smiled, taking the warm mug in his hand and humming in content as it warmed up his cold fingers.

everyone was chatting and having fun already. after the gift giving felix brought out a bunch of snacks and drinks (yes that included alcohol) for everyone.

he even put on a movie. he of course chose the polar express because how could he not? and that was what jisung had been blankly staring at for the past couple minutes as he thought.

he brought the mug to his lips and carefully took a sip of the rich, warm drink and instantly felt his shoulders fall in bliss.

"you know, he really got you a good gift." felix said, eyes darting down to the giant stuffed animal placed securely in jisung's lap.

hell, it could've been a pillow honestly.

"yeah.." jisung nodded, looking at it briefly before back at felix. "i'm honestly kind of in shock." he said.

felix was the one to nod this time. "i think we all were. it was really thoughtful, the fact that he took your plushie army into account and remembered to apply it to a gift. and it's a BIG fucking cat too." felix gawked, reaching a hand out to pat it.

jisung took another sip, eyes falling back to the screen that played the movie quietly.

everybody else was busy playing games or eating, so it was just felix and jisung sitting there. they were talking quietly though, because the others were still just a few feet away going in and out of rooms.

"you should say thank you." felix suggested, smiling brightly. "i don't think you realize that you didn't even say thanks yet."

and that was true. he hadn't properly said a thank you for the gift he actually fell in love with.