Hate me. (Minsung)

//111//

minho was gone for way longer than jisung expected him to be, even with the warning.

it was now the seventh day of sitting in class with no one beside him, jotting down notes with colorful pens and little stickers he bought at the convenience store.

but jisung grew restless.

far more restless than he ever expected to be.

being home alone was beginning to mess him up more than before. typically he was able to distract himself with shows or by going out with friends- but being alone for a full week really began reminding him of how it felt like as a child.

and he hated it.

it was more manageable in the past- but he had gotten so used to the routine he formed with minho that it felt so wrong now.

he felt so unmotivated and alone. it felt so similar to the way he felt growing up and he could do absolutely nothing about it.

he sat in class, finishing the notes. he slumped against his arm for support by the end of it, unable to hold himself up properly from feeling so tired.

he hadn't been sleeping well at all.

he sighed as he shut the notebook, happy with how the notes looked despite his state.

being stuck home alone really started to make him feel depressed. an emotion he always tried his best to combat and push away.

he knew feeling awful wasn't all simply because it was minho who went away, but he acknowledged that it was a small contribution.

it was embarrassing and he wouldn't admit it to anyone, but he really wasn't doing well.

"hey jisung! wanna go for lunch today?" hyunjin approached the blonde with a warm smile, hand tapping his arm slightly with his question.

this perked jisung up as he turned to face the brunette with a little smile. "hey hyun." he said, packing his things in his bag. "sorry not today." he said apologetically. "i have a lot of work today."

part of the terrible cycle jisung found himself in made it impossible to find motivation to go out, despite feeling alone.

this was his third time rejecting an offer to hang out.

he felt terrible about it, but jisung really couldn't find it in him to go anywhere like this.

he didn't understand it.

"oh, that's fine. have any plans for today besides working on stuff?" hyunjin asked, waiting for jisung so they could at least walk out the lecture together.

jisung shook his head. "no, just a bunch of assignments." he sighed, rubbing his eyes to hopefully get rid of some of the tired sting there.

he wondered if his terrible mental state was evident on his face.

"oh, well if you need any help with them just let me know! i might be able to help." hyunjin offered, and jisung smiled appreciatively.

"thanks hyunjin. i'll let you know, but i hope you have a nice rest of your day." he said with a wave, earning one in return as the two went their separate ways with a mutual 'goodbye'.

he began the walk back home.

in the middle of waiting for the light to signal he could cross, he got out his phone to check his messages.

throughout these past few days, he and minho had been texting on and off.

minho would shoot him at least one text a day, always first. always checking in on him.