The Kim Family Tetralogy

21

"So tell me." Yoongi said when everyone but Jimin had left and it was just the two of them, sitting on the couch with a glass of wine in their hands.
Jimin sighed and looked off to the right.
Everything felt like a big knot.
Crammed in his chest.
Making it almost impossible to breathe.
And, there was still the sexual tension between them.
He felt it.
But chose to ignore it.
He was done running away by running towards.
Taking the, seemingly, easier way out.
'Cause it never was.
It always led him to some fresh new hell.
'Impulse control.' he reminded himself, 'Impulse control.'
He wished he could've found it in himself to talk to Taehyung about this, but, for some reason their relationship seemed too young? Too, unevolved, for this conversation.
Or if it was Jimin himself who couldn't relate to Taehyung in a more mature way?
'Cause God knows Taehyung was an mature adult with freaking ancient-like insights into all things human.
Yoongi and him, on the other hand, had never been kids together.
They got to know eachother when they'd both already traveled into adulthood.
Their relationship had been, complicated.
But that was also the reason Jimin trusted Yoongi.
Complexity was something Yoongi could handle.
Jimin knew that for a fact.
He put the glass on the small table infront of him and shoved his hands between his tighs, squeezing, everything, tight, keeping himself together, trying to stay whole.
To not break.
'Cause that's was he feared.
That he would shatter and never be put right again.

"I'm," Jimin started, but gasped.
It was just too painful.
"Tell me." Yoongi said, moving closer, putting an arm around him, suddenly scared shitless Jimin was going to tell him he was dying, or something.
"I have a kid, a five-year-old son, well he's six soon. I'm a dad. I didn't know. She didn't tell me. I'm, trying, to get to know him. He doesn't speak to me. I love her. She didn't tell me. I love him too. I love him. I want to know him. I want him! I want him! He hates me. He hates his mom. We've hurt him so bad. I don't know what to do. And I love her. And she lied to me. We were so close. Didn't tell me! And I thought we were, you know, like what they have," he nodded in some sort of Taekook direction, "She was to me, and, I'm, I can't, she's, he's, like, I can't." he gasped again, when the searing, hot, pain charred his lungs.
"Oh, my sweet Token." Yoongi sighed and pulled Jimin into his chest, holding him close.
"I'm so in love with her, Minmin!" Jimin cried, starting to weep in Yoongi's arms, "I've never been more hurt! Or lost! Or, I don't know!" he sobbed, ugly crying, clawing onto Yoongi, "I lo-hove her!"
"Schh, schh." Yoongi soothed, stroking his hair, "It's ok, baby boy. It's ok."
"And she's keeping me away! To protect him! And I get it! He's hurting! He's my-hy son!" he completely broke down, collapsing in Yoongi's arms, "Omg, he's so tiny! And he's hurting! We're all hurting! I can't!" he retched, "Maybe I should just leave them!" he wailed, screaming out his pain, almost throwing up from despair, "I don't care if I suffer! I don't want them to. I'll take all the pain if they can just be spared!"
"Oh, sweetheart." Yoongi comforted, tears dripping from his own eyes, "I get that. I'd want that, too. I think?" he sob-laughed, being out of his depth at the present.
Like, really.
"I'm sorry. You came to the wrong guy. I have no idea how any of this works." he felt the need to say, on an embarrassed snort.
"I can't talk to anyone else." Jimin shook his head, "They won't get it!" he started cramp-crying, holding on to Yoongi like a life raft.
"I do get it, Token. I do." Yoongi comforted, kissing him on the back of his head, but feeling utterly useless.
And depressed.
On behalf of his friend.
"Just let it out, baby boy." he crooned, "Just let it out."
"AAAH GOOOD!" Jimin screamed, "IT HURTS! IT HUUURTS!"
"I know it does. I know it does, baby." Yoongi soothed, caressing his back.
"OH GOD, YOONGI! IT HUUUUURTS!"
"Schh, schh, Minmin's here. I'm here, baby." Yoongi was bent over Jimin, cradling him, rocking them from side to side.
Letting Jimin cry the tears he needed to cry.
Not letting him drown.
"Why does it have to hurt so much!" Jimin yelled, "Why is everything so fucking hard?"
"Beats me." Yoongi sighed, still holding on to Jimin, who was laying halfway over his legs.
"And the worst, the worst is, this, fucking, constant, battle, against, you know? Me!"
"I know, baby boy. I know." Yoongi agreed.
"And that, I don't know? Festering, rot, inside me? That wants to take over?" Jimin continued.
"Yeah," Yoongi nodded, "but we can't let it, Jimin, we can't!" Yoongi held him out with a painful grip of Jimin's biceps, "We have to rage against the dying of the light."
"Jesus Christ." Jimin snorted, "That shit, again? How drunk are you?"
"Oh, shut up!" Yoongi shoved him lightly before hugging him to his body again, "You know exactly what that means."
"Yeah," Jimin sighed, "unfortunately, I do." he snuggled closer to Yoongi, "We're in Slytherin, you and I." he sighed deeper, "Envying the Gryffindors."
"Yeah, but Tae," Yoongi started to object,
"Could be in Slytherin." Jimin interrupted him, "Could. But he isn't. He chose to be in Gryffindor with Kook and Hobi. 'Cause he's brave."
"True." Yoongi nodded.
They sat silent for a while.
"Well, as long as you're not in Hufflepuff..." Yoongi said, loaded with underlying distain.
"Yeah, no." Jimin snorted, "Safety scissors and glitter glue is not a good look for us."
"No." Yoongi laughed his silent laugh, kissing Jimin on the back of his head one more time, before letting him go.