Tommyinnit Oneshots (With SBI) (Book 2)

Falling Apart (Tommy angst) (2/2)

Tommy POV

An irritating beeping noise steadily beeped in Tommy's ear, causing him to slowly wake up. Reluctantly opening his eyes, a blinding white light poured into them, causing him to groan and shut them once more. Where was he? Why did the light hurt so much?

There were footsteps and then a voice spoke, "The lights are off Toms, you can open your eyes now." The voice was soft, filled with what Tommy guessed was exhaustion. 

Groaning, Tommy opened his eyes once more, grateful for the dimness in the room. Studying his surroundings, he was surprised to find himself in a hospital room with Wilbur beside him. The brunette offered a tired smile, but Tommy could see the unspoken concern behind his eyes. Why was Wilbur here? Didn't he hate him?

"Wilbur? Where am I?" the blonde asked, attempting to rack his memories for answers. Almost immediately he felt the pounding in his head. He winced, reaching up to touch his forehead, where a new scar was forming. What happened?

"You're in the hospital Tommy." Wilbur began, speaking as calmly as he could manage. "You've been here for three days now."

Tommy lifted his arm, confused to find a tube attached to it. Looking up at it, he realized he was connected to an IV. "What happened?" he glanced towards Wilbur, hoping he could provide the answers.

Wilbur took a deep breath, seemingly finding discomfort in the subject. "Do you remember anything? At all?" He met his eyes, searching them for some kind of a hint.

Tommy thought for a moment. "I was home alone. And I-" he stopped abruptly, the realization hitting him. "You know..." he whispered, his eyes wide with panic.

The brunette nodded, a sigh escaping his lips. Fidgeting with his hands, he began to retell the events. "I've been trying to get a hold of you for ages ever since you just stopped talking to me... or anyone else. So when you answered that night, I was ecstatic. What I didn't expect was for you to be drunk." He watched Tommy carefully, still continuing. "Then you somehow managed to cut your head, which nearly gave me a heart attack. Luckily, you only needed a few stitches."

"I-" but Tommy couldn't find the words. What was he supposed to say? Nothing he said would make it better. Wilbur knew.

"What scares me is that you seemed very comfortable with being drunk. Too comfortable for a first time." he crossed his arms, his voice growing stern. "How long have you been drinking Tommy?"

"That was the first time." Tommy quickly lied, hoping it sounded convincing. But this wasn't his parents, this was Wilbur. And Wilbur wasn't so easily fooled.

"Bullshit." Wilbur shook his head, his eyes never leaving Tommy's. "I want the truth Tommy. Or I'll call Phil. and I'm sure he would love to hear all about your first time." Tommy felt the panic sink into his chest at the idea. He knew Wilbur was dead serious. And if Phil found out... he knew he couldn't handle that much disappointment.

"Okay... it wasn't the first time." Tommy admitted. He sighed, staring down at his sweaty palms. He didn't want to tell Wilbur the reason. He didn't want him to see how weak he was. But he knew he had to tell him. Part of him knew that it would help, as much as he didn't want to admit it. "I didn't mean for it to get this bad. I just... I just wanted the pain to stop." His head hung low in shame. 

Wilbur's gaze immediately softened at his words. "What pain?" he asked gently, his heart pounding at the blonde's words.

"The pain of everything! School! Streaming! It's just too much." Tears leaked from his eyes as he continued, he felt like his walls were falling down. "And I-I thought I could make it all stop... But the hate kept coming. It didn't stop." He buried his face in his hands, feeling the guilt weigh down on him. He wished Wilbur didn't have to see him like this.

To his surprise, he felt two arms pull him into a safe hug. His eyes widened, Wilbur wasn't mad at him? He didn't hate him? The older sighed, resting his chin on the blonde's head. That's when he felt tears dripping onto his own shirt. Was Wilbur... crying? "I'm sorry I wasn't there for you." he whispered, holding Tommy closer. "I could have helped you."

"It's not your fault. Please don't blame yourself." Tommy sniffed, melting into the older's touch. "I-I should have called you. I just thought..." he hesitated, unsure of whether or not he should tell him. Shaking his head, he forced himself to continue. "I thought you hated me too."

Wilbur froze at his words, pulling back to meet his eyes. "Please don't ever think that." he paused, his eyes suddenly growing wide. "Is that why would wouldn't answer my calls?" Tommy silently nodded, again melting into the brunette's embrace. "Oh Tommy, you're like a little brother to me. And I love you so much, all of us do. Don't ever listen to those dumb people on the Internet." 

"I'm sorry!" Tommy exclaimed, wiping his tears. "It's just so hard!"

"I know Toms, I know." Wilbur nodded, knowing exactly what it felt like. It wasn't that long ago when he had been going through the same thing. But there was someone that helped him. And that was Tommy. 

And now it was time for Wilbur to help him.

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-Snowy