Ask Alex ~A wattpad Advice Column~

Too much on the plate

I don't know If you you are still doing the advice column but if you are I have a few questions for you...

I looked into a few of these kind of columns and yours was by far the most helpful I could find.

1) I just recently broke up with my boyfriend. three days ago to be accurate. through I need to explain this a bit more.

he and I dated off and on for the past two years. I care for him a lot. but he could be an idiot. let me explain.

I spent the summer I was in crutches talking to him over Facebook. we are both complete and total nerds or geeks. well we kinda fell for eachother.

when school came back around I met this girl in the grade below us. she was okay... well she got a crush on him the moment I introduced the two. I figured I would let her have her chance with him. no one knew I liked him so I stepped back. turned out he didn't like her that way or so he said.to prove it to her he came up with the idea of kissing her. he asked me if I was okay with it and I said I didn't care. I did but it was his choice not mine. so he went through it. long story short he said he felt nothing. though I can't say the same about her. he asked me out about two weeks later. after a few months they start acting weird. so I ask around our small group of friends but no ones saying anything. they're all kinda unable to look me in the eye. well someone stepped into the plate and fessed up but it wasn't them it was a mutual friend. she told me everything she knew about it. pretty much over the Christmas break they told eachother that they loved eachother. so we broke it off. well what my ex didn't know was she and her ex planned it all so her ex James could be the knight in shining armor and come in to comfort me while she got Dylan. James liked me since I transferred here. well their plan didn't work.

later on Dylan and I eventually agreed to get back together. well summer came along and after that freshman orentation. he avoided me the whole event. nothing New. I kinda saw it coming. i guess its when he did it that pissed me off. I had marching band practice an hour after orentation and he comes up during this hour gap and breaks it off. saying he didn't see himself liking me at the end of high school. well after a while as stupid as it may seem I got back together with him. and well the cycle started again. he was avoiding me. so instead of waiting... mind you during all of this our mutual best friend Noah was on my side... like I always would I demanded he tell me what was going on. I was getting tired of it. this occured over this spring break. well I had missed two weeks of school something I will ask about later and during that time his feeling for me decreased. I asked if that meant we were over and he said he want ed to give past it. how you do that is beyond me but I agreed. I was willing to give that final chance. well to him movie past it is acting like it never happened. so for my sanity I broke it off kinda for the closer I needed.

problem is he and I are best friends and Noah the guy that has always been there for me is my other best friend...I have with a lot of guys... well Noah is also Dylans best friend... okay we are pathetic and we are pretty much eachothers only real friends... anyways. Noah is really pissed at Dylan because of what he did. and secretly I have had this huge crush on Noah. for a while now. before I got back with Dylan. I honestly feel bad for Noah too because Dylan takes like everythng from him. I didn't know this at first but Dylan has dated every girl or crushed on every girl Noah has liked. turns out I am included in that number.

I don't know if he feels the same way. we flirt a lot but we have always done that. I don't know if I should tell him or try to move past it... we are really close and I dont want to ruin that. I also worry about the fact that it could be awkward with the Dylan situation. what should I do?

2) my dad just deployed. that is why I missed two weeks. we got to see him before he left. well this is kinda why it hurt to know what was going on because It was bad timing. anyway. I'm struggling with this. I can't focus in school or out of school. I'm kinda like blah all day.my grades are slipping and I'm a straight a student. and I mean slipping to fs. not exaggerating. I don't know how to focus more. and all this other crop doesn't help. what would you recommend?

also what would you suggest for sleeping. I haven't slept more than two hours a night in forever and I think that might be effecting some of the other stuff as well. any ideas?

I know this is a lot and I'm not sure if you are still doing advice but if you could just write me back.

sincerly,

falling at the seams

__________

Dear falling at the seams,

Wow Hun that is a lot to take in. Not only for me but for you too. D: but okay let me try my best to give you some advice. I just firstly have to say that you and your ex relationship was not healthy at all and I'm glad that you guys are now just being friends. Yes I put those words in the nicest way I could. But anyways so you told me this whole story with you and him only to ask about Noah. But my question is why did you stay with Dylan if you had a crush on Noah?! I don't think if you really were serious with Dylan that you would have a crush on another but it's also understandable since you all are really close but that makes me wonder, since you said that Dylan takes everything from Noah... Does that mean Noah still has a thing for you? Well that is the big question there and if it what I think it is I feel like it's a good time than any to make some happy memories but Noah has to step to the plate. I think you deserve to be happy and not be stuck on some guy, that in my opinion, is a idiot and a jerk. No offense. But I feel like the guy got plenty of skrew ups and him avoiding you? Yeah childish. I don't think he was being serious with the relationship and he even said he didn't see if lasting, well I wonder why buddy. You did that to yourself. You could have had a great girl but no you just letting her go because of your idiocy. Okay let me stop lol but anyways getting back on point here, I think you should bring this up to Noah. Ask him how he feels but be sneaky about it. Ask him if it's true that Dylan dates every guy he likes and if you were one of them then if he does say it's true ask him if he still feels the same way and to be completely honest about it. If he does then tell him how you feel and go from there. But if he doesn't admit it then you can choose what's best for you. Listen to what your heart is telling you at that moment. I understand you don't want to ruin your closeness but if you guys were really close then telling him or dating each other shouldn't ruin that. And he was with you through the Dylan situation right? Then why should it be awkward? Sometimes the best relationships are founded on things that you two have already gone through, this situation is no different.

I'm sorry about your dad but this should only make you stronger. I may not know what it feels like to have a dad get deployed but I do understand what it's like to have a million things dumped on you and then I know what it feels like to miss your dad. See I don't live with my dad. My dad is in a different country. There's a lot of hurt and miss there but you have to be strong. My grades were slipping when things started to happen. I understand the feeling but sometimes to raise those grades you got to push everything to the side and focus. Get lost in your work and do things that make you happy. Surround yourself with people that make you laugh and smile because that's how you get through things, especially this.

As for sleeping I would say that you have insomnia.. Which is due to all that is happening to you right now. I talked to my grandma who is a nurse and she recommends to go to a doctor who will prescribe you medicine to help you sleep because it isn't healthy for that. It messes with your health. That is from some one in the medical field and I would listen to them.

See if I didn't ask my grandma I would have just told you that maybe listening to music while sleeping or even doing something before you sleep could help you get tired enough to get more sleep but in your case of two hours only I would listen to what my grandma had to say.. It's really the only way and please do not self medicate yourself. I don't want you to over dose.

I hope this helps Hun! I hope you feel better and sleep well! <3

Concerned,

Alex