Classic Rock Bands One-shots

Queen: Wisdom Removal⭐

vampiregirl2131890 Here's Your Request. Hope It's Silly Enough For You.

They arrive home Roger has just gotten back from getting his wisdom teeth taken out, and he was still on the drugs they gave him. Brian yelps as Roger yanks on his man-bun when he tries to get the blond out of the car, “I-If you aren’t a Samurai why would you have a man-bun?” Roger slurs, “You’re not even Asian, you’re racist.” he tugs on it harder, “Is this a weave?”

John gets Roger out since John had a hat on and it hides his long hair, “I’m flying!” Roger shouts as John carries him inside.

“John’s carrying you.” Freddie informs him,

Roger blinks at him, “I put my dick in a pickle jar and got an infection.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.” Freddie laughs opening the bedroom door for them.

“I got an infection down there, do you think the pickle jar caused it?”

Freddie looks to John who’s trying to tuck him in, “Most likely.”

Roger screams when John removes the gauze out of his mouth, “He took my tongue! The twat took my tongue!”

“It’s gauze.”

Roger cries even as John replaces it with fresh gauze, “My tongue.” Roger sobs, “She was too young!”

John shakes his head and grabs Freddie’s wrist, “Lets go.” as they shut the door Roger wails, 

“I don’t want to be an orphan!”

John and Freddie go downstairs, and meet up with Brian. They sat down on the couch watching tv, none of the men saw Roger stumble out the back door into the backyard until they heard the potted plants being broken before they could rush out there Roger came back in with something behind his back.

“I found a dog in the backyard!”

“A dog?” Freddie questions trying to peek around him,

“Yes, a very handsome doggy.” Roger nods his head hard.

“Whose dog?” John asks, also trying to see.

“Well it doesn’t matter.” Roger states, “It doesn’t have a collar, he was by himself in the yard looking for a hike. I picked him up and he’s a little greasy.” Roger says proudly.

“Well where’s the dog?” Brian asks, getting kinda fed up.

Roger shows them what was behind his back, “He’s still in my hands.” he tells them, “He was afraid and peed on me but has calmed down, I think he wants a bath.”

“Ribbit.” says the “dog” in Roger’s hands,

“That’s not a dog.” the three boys inform him.

Roger begins crying bloody gauze leaves his mouth, “Doggy!”

Brian takes the frog out of his hands, “I’m going to take the doggy to the vet, why don’t you go take a nap?”

Roger sniffles and goes to head upstairs as Brian leaves out the back door. Roger goes up the stairs on all fours like a bear he drools and keeps crawling. He peers over the balcony and sees the pretty chandelier. He backs up and leaps over the railing and straddles the chandelier,

 “I’m going to swing from the chandelier!” Roger bellows out.

John screams and tries to get him down safely but Roger decides to jump off the chandelier. The thing is very high up, maybe twenty feet? I am not good with numbers or big houses.

“Catch him!” John yells,

Freddie got a face full of Roger’s crotch when he landed. Freddie could feel his nose break on the impact, blood was everywhere and Roger was loudly singing, “Strawberry Fields Forever” at the top of his lungs, while Brian attended to Freddie’s nose.

“I’m going to kiss George.” Roger slurs spitting out the gauze in his mouth, “I want his fangs to pierce me.”

“George Harrison?” John asks, throwing the gauze away and getting Roger a sippy cup of water.

Roger nods, “Harrison,” Roger sips his water, “I want him biting me and R-Ringo pounding into me.”

John snickers, “Uh-huh, that’s nice.”

“I found Paul on Grinder.” Roger states pulling out his phone, “Lookie!”

John looks at it, “Holy shit. Look at his profile picture.” his jaw drops.

Freddie and Brian look at it, “He’s showing off his ass in lacy lingerie.” Freddie points out,

“A mirror selfie though, really?” Brian giggles, “Tacky.”

“Look at the heels he’s wearing.” Freddie chuckles, “They’re like six inch.”

Roger jumps off the counter and yanks his shorts down, “Look I’m wearing panties!”

“At least yours is tasteful.” Freddie chuckles.

Roger twirls around trying to grab his pants, “Does it say ‘Daddy’s Boy’ on the ass of it?” John questions,

“Who’s your daddy?” Freddie asks.

Roger looks up and blood dribbles down his chin, “You are.”

Freddie blushes red, “I’m not into dudes. I have Mary.”

Brian laughs, “Good one, Freddie. We all caught you sucking Elton’s dick at the Beach’s Christmas party.” 

Freddie blushes and looks away, “Elton’s your daddy!” Roger chants.

“Shut up!” Freddie yells,

“Daddy! Daddy!” Roger shouts.

Freddie storms out of the room the door slams and it’s loud. John looks at Roger, “Brian try and help get the drugs out of his system. I’m going to talk to Freddie.”

Brian got water down Roger and some food which he threw up a pretty rainbow all over the counter and floor, “Look my vomit is gay!”

Brian groans and cleans it up leaving Roger alone for a moment. Roger bounces on the couch, “I’m Tarzan! I’m Tarzan!l the couch flips backwards and Roger goes toppling over with a bang.

He cries, “Mum! Mummy!”

Brian scoops him up and holds him up like a baby. Kissing and loving on him, “Hey you’re okay. You’re okay.”

Roger sniffles snuggling into him, “Thank you Mr. Samurai.” 

“Whatever.” Brian gets him back in bed, “Sleep well.”

“Goodnight, Samurai.” Roger tugs on Brian’s hair, “Good luck hair pull.”

Brian chuckles, “Yeah goodnight.”

Roger sits up and kisses him, “I’m not gay.”

“What?” Brian was stunned, 

“I’m bisexual.” Roger sits back, “I’m going to have a vampire boyfriend and a boyfriend with a big nose.”

Brian tucks him in with a sigh, “Goodnight.”

He shuts off the lights and leaves shaking his head, he didn’t think Roger would react like that with the dentist’s drugs. Brian couldn’t wait to tease Roger once he’s sober.