KNOWING ME KNOWING YOU ⇒ jegulus one shots

LILY, LILY, LILY

James' legs stretch over and onto Regulus' lap and he yawns. "Hey, Lily's coming back tomorrow."

There is a long pause, before;

"Do you still have feelings for her?"

It's so sudden that James nearly chokes. "I-I'm getting the distinct feeling that this is a test, Reg,." He laughs, eyes crinkling, but Regulus just looks at him.

James sighs. "'Course I do. I probably always will." he pauses and then adds, "It was weird before she left, you know, because you came back and I......" He blows out a long, slow breath. "I had feelings for both of you. But there's a reason I chose you, Reg, and it's not because Lil was leaving, alright?"

"What was it then?" Regulus' voice is calm and level but his eyes are calculating.

James realizes he must've taken too long to reply as Regulus unceremoniously pushes James' legs off of him and stands up. He's slipping on a discarded pair of jeans, much too tight for him now, although he doesn't bother zipping up the fly, before James even thinks to react. His lavender satin night gown discarded on the floor.

"Hey! Regulus! Reg, what're you doin',?" James scrabbles off of the couch to stand, but Regulus ignores him, bending down to pull on his shoes. He hesitates next to the door only to grab a jacket, not glancing back at James once.

James slowly approaches him like he's a wild animal. He gets close, but not too close. He doesn't try to make physical contact. Once again, Regulus very purposefully does not look at him.

"Reg, please." The kettle starts whistling and James' mouth opens and closes. "Look, I'll-" He pauses. "I'll make you tea and tell you all about it if you just.......come back to the sofa, alright? Sit down?"

"I need some air," Regulus grits out, and he shoves his keys into his pocket.

James opens his mouth to speak, to protest, to profess his undying feelings for just Regulus, only Regulus, but Regulus opens the door and it slams shut behind him.

James bites his lip and pauses. He turns off the stove and sits down on the sofa. What is he going to tell Regulus? What can he say other than that he loves him, which he's already said, although usually during sex. Has it only been during sex? He rubs his eyes with the heels of his hands. Regulus had never returned the graceful gesture of proclaiming any kind of love for him.

Regulus was simply carrying his baby, he didn't seem to have any feelings attached toward James. But considering he's quite literally left their apartment in an upset haze at the mention of James' ex, James has an idea that maybe it isn't that unrequited between the pair of them.

They'd made a baby. By accident.

Sirius had gone feral, the idea of his brother and his best friend causally sleeping together and his best friend accidentally impregnating his baby brother? The baby has been an accident, but with Regulus well into his fourth month, they had already moved in together into Regulus'' apartment. They'd chosen Regulus' apartment, James felt that he may be more comfortable growing a baby within his own familiar environment.

They wanted to live together just until they figure it all out.

But James already knows what he wants; Regulus, all of Regulus, all the sullen boy has to offer.

Regulus isn't exactly helpless and James knows he'll be pissed if James questions him, but the guy is pregnant and self-destructive so James does what he can; throws on his nearest jacket and heads out the door into the rain.

It takes him a few minutes to find Regulus, who's walking aimlessly with his hands shoved deep into his pockets. Regulus may be angry mostly because he's hormonal, but this is James' fault and he needs to fix it, especially since Regulus' whole reason for being hormonal is pretty much James' fault, too.

It's only when Regulus staggers and trips, his arm going protectively to his belly on instinct, that James makes himself known.

"Reg....." James calls out, Regulus seems to halt. "I think you and I have something to discuss."

"Fuck you," Regulus says, as he turns to face James.

But now that James is up close, he can see how red his eyes are, the tear tracks down his cheeks. It's kind of pathetic and James can't believe Regulus would rather cry in public than just come home. That is, until he remembers how stubborn Regulus is.

James takes a step toward him. "Please, Reg. Just talk to me, the baby's more important to me than an old girlfriend-"

"The baby is, huh?" Regulus returns and James catches his meaning perfectly. "She isn't an old girlfriend! She's-" Regulus shakes his head. "Just leave me alone! God, fuck off and leave me alone!"

James cocks his head at Regulus. "Is that what you want?"

"Yes," Regulus says, shrugging, and James can tell all he wants now is to save face, to be the braver of the two; to protect himself and his heart.

"I'm sorry, but I can't do that," James says firmly. There are a million things he can't say right now, but he knows Regulus needs to hear them.

Regulus stares at him for a very long time, rain droplets decorating his face. He wallows. "Fine."

Regulus let's James grab his wrist and practically drag him back to their apartment building. Once inside and their wet jackets removed, Regulus stays silent even after James has tugged off his jeans and helped him back into his snuggly fitted night gown that shows the curve of his belly perfectly. James loves that curve.

"Okay, I know I did that wrong. I know, I know," James says, pacing before the sofa as Regulus has renestled himself down onto it. He scratches the back of his head. "But you gotta understand.........I'll always have feelings for Lily. She's......she's one of my best friends. And so are you,"

"You don't get one of your best friend's up the duff and move into their apartment," Regulus drawls. He's looking away, but his hurt is betrayed by the way he swipes at his eyes. "Did you think I'd be flattered? You liking the two of us at once?"

James stops, his mouth hanging open. "No. It's not," He sighs. "It's not just that-"

"'Not just that,'" Regulus repeats. "What is it then? Or haven't you thought of a good lie yet, Potter?" He's looking at James now, eyes burning, and James swallows.

"Reg......." James shakes his head and Regulus makes a noise.

"Maybe you should move the fuck out of my apartment then, James. Wouldn't want Lily to think you actually wanted to be with me."

James' own eyes are watering. This has gone so far beyond his control he isn't certain he can fix it, but he needs to try, so he does the one thing he can think of.

"I love you, Regulus." There's a flicker in Regulus' expression, but it's gone as quickly as it appears.

"Why should I believe that?" Regulus says, the words forced through the vice of his throat.

James laughs. "You're the one who's always saying what a terrible liar I am. So......" The corner of his mouth twitches. "Does this sound like a lie?" He drops to his knees in front of Regulus and stares up into his eyes. "I love you, Regulus Arcturus Black. Like." He clenches and unclenches his fists. "I love you."

The sternness of Regulus' expression seems to crumble and he lets James grasp his hands, twine their fingers together. James begins to presses kisses to Regulus' knuckles.

"I'm not apologizing," Regulus tells him.

James presses a kiss to Regulus' rounded belly, the satin fabric soft against his lips. He imagines it feels nice against Regulus' skin. "I know."

"Did you really have to come after me in the rain?" Regulus asks incredulously after a moment.

Jsmes' lips quirk, and he starts to nod enthusiastically. "Uh huh. Yes. Absolutely, I did." He pauses, before, "Did you really have to storm out in the rain?"

"You're an idiot, James Potter," Regulus says, but there's laughter in his voice. "And yes," He pauses. "I did have to leave in the rain. I'm a Black, we tend to do dramatics." He says swiftly.

"I know," James says again, and he's smiling as he let's his hand curl around Regulus' belly even more than it already had been.