(Shattered...) Dreams Fulfilled

Magical Night

The sun had set over the horizon making way for the lingering colors of dusk to illuminate the nighttime sky. Deep orange blended with the ever present clouds cushioning themselves between the intensity of indigo blue as it bled to the blackness of the night, a shiny sliver of moon creating the perfect picture on a night filled with renewed hope and love.

"What are you thinking?"

"How do you know I'm thinking..." she said holding him closer, her head comfortably nestled against his chest, enjoying the slow rhythmic strokes of his hand on her back.

"Uhmmmm...I've told you...I can feel your every emotion...when you're in my arms..."

"I beginning to think you can..."

"So?"

"Right now, I'm just enjoying being in your arms...and look Derek...look at those colors...a portrait of dusk just for us...can you feel it ...the magic of this night..."

He heard the longing in her voice, the wonderment, and emotions of guilt swept over him, realizing he'd never done anything to allow her to express those emotions in the past...those thoughts of romance he knew she was afraid to feel.

"I do..." he said with a catch in his voice, "I can feel it..."

She turned to face him, "Derek, I can feel your emotions too... what's wrong?"

He swallowed hard, and blue met the grey green gaze.

"I have so much," he paused, "so much to make up to you."

"Derek," she whispered as she brought both hands to cup his face, "let's not go back...not with sadness...we'll learn from it...but move forward...ok?"

"What did I do to deserve you?"

"Fate...I think...fate took care of that for us..." she said with tears glistening in her eyes.

"I want...Meredith, I want to give you so much...make up for so much...I took for granted."

"I told you...I'm going to let you...you'll have your chance, Derek, we both will, because, there's things...many things I regret too..."

"You don't...don't have..."

"We're going to do this together...ok?"

"Ok."

"Derek," she said, looking deep into his eyes, his gaze never faltering and allowing her to look deep into his soul, "do you have any idea...how...how...overwhelming my feelings are for you?"

"I can only hope...in my heart...in my soul...I can only hope...that what I think you feel...is what's in my heart and soul."

"You don't have to hope...just feel them...and know...I'm yours...for a lifetime Derek,
if you want me...I'm yours for a lifetime."

"If I want you," he murmured, his voice overcome with emotion, "if I want you..." he said as she kissed the tears on his face, "you...you still doubt that I love you...that I can't live without you."

"No, not after tonight. There's no more doubts, just as I know my life is only truly complete with you."

"Meredith," he choked and captured her lips with his, both lost in the intensity and raw vulnerability of the magic of the night.

They held on to each other as dusk turned into night. "Derek, aren't you hungry?"

"Starving," he told her looking deep into her eyes with the look of lust and longing elicited only by her.

"That's not the kind of hunger we're feeding tonight."

"Uhmmm...bossy tone is back."

"I'm ignoring you...but I'm hungry."

"Let's see what you've got for us," he said as he lifted her from his lap, and left her sitting on the chair while he got up to set up their dinner.

"It's all things you like, and I can help you know, it's not like I'm offering to cook."

"Relax, let me take care of you."

"Ok."

"What no argument?"

"I got the food...I agree, you can set the rest up," she smiled, without revealing how truly exhausted she felt.

"Truly lazy, I can't believe I had not picked up on that trait before."

"What did you get for dessert, you told me you took care of that."

"I did."

"What is it?"

"You'll like it, just wait till after dinner."

"I hate surprises Derek."

"No you don't, what did you think of tonight?"

"Tonight," she whispered, "has been...beyond perfect."

He stopped what he was doing and came to her, leaning down to softly kiss her lips, and murmured against them, "perfect, absolutely perfect."

She held his hand before he walked away, "thank you."

"I'm hoping you'll change your mind about surprises," he teased, and kissed her lips once more.

"Derek, did ...you weren't mad...were you, I mean...that I took the phone from you...and spoke to your sister?"

"No, and she loved it, maybe she'll get off my case for a while."

"Why did you tell her not to say anything? Will you change your mind, I mean...about me coming with you...is that why you want her to wait."

"No, I will not change my mind...I told you days ago, I wanted you to come with me."

"Then, why..."

"Meredith, something's going on with you...I want to find out what it is."

She got up, slowly to avoid any possible repeat of her dizziness, and went to his side, and put her arms around him. "Derek, I'm sure I'm fine, just this is one time that's been odd, I mean it could just be hormones...and they do all sorts of things to mess up your body...and it's probably just that."

"I know...but, your dizziness...exhaustion...I'm worried...and I just want to make sure you're ok."

"If it continues...I'll get it checked out, ok?"

He noticed a hint of hesitation, perhaps even fear in her voice. "Hey, look at me, I'm sure it's nothing serious too, I just want you healthy."

"I know..."

"But?"

"I'm worried too...this...it's...it's not normal."

"You know what," he said kissing her softly and then embracing her, "I'm sure it's just that you've had a very rough year...immune system is affected by stress, and I've been thinking, your symptoms of exhaustion and dizziness are probably a mild case of anemia."

"I didn't think of that."

"Well, you know... two doctors...oblivious to such a simple and obvious diagnosis...we'll draw some blood, and figure it out."

"You know I hate needles...you'll do it? If I'm not better in the next few days, you'll do it?"

"Yes, I'll do it."

"Let me help you..."

"Sit down...I'm almost done."

"Derek, I've been thinking..."

"What?"

"You won't laugh at me?"

He laughed, "oh, you're setting yourself up."

"It's a very important question."

"Ok."

"Are there bears here...on this land...?"

He dropped the container, "you're worried about bears?"

"Yes. I mean...look at this Derek, it's like being in the wild...with not a single soul around...and well, I think there can be bears...I've heard..."

"What have you heard?"

"I saw it...on the news... that they sighted a black bear."

"You're afraid of bears?"

"Of course, I'm afraid of bears...Derek, they are ...they're bears!!!"

"I don't think we have to worry about it."

"You haven't answered my question, so tell me what you know."

"I saw that news clip too."

"Oh my God, you're building a house on a cliff surrounded by bears."

He laughed, a hearty sound he could not contain.

"I told you not to laugh at me," she smiled and smacked his arm.

"Meredith, did you buy out Real Foods?"

"I got everything I know you like."

"We could feed several people with all this."

"Just make sure we don't feed any bears," she joked and got up to hug him.

"I love you Meredith."

She answered with a kiss.

He'd used the table and cooler top to lay out the containers, as they served themselves and each sat to enjoy their dinner.

He'd poured them each a glass of red wine, and looked at her, thinking he'd never loved her as much as he did at that moment, but then, she looked at him and smiled and he knew their world at that moment was perfect.

He raised his glass, "to us."

"To our lifetime..." she responded, and reaching out for his hand brought it to her lips.

They had finished dinner and started to put everything away, when he felt the vibration of his phone and looked at the caller's number.

"Oh, no, I knew she couldn't keep it quiet."

"What?"

"It's my mother."

"Derek, answer it."

"No. Unless you want to talk to her too," he smiled.

"You are being a child, Derek, answer the phone. It's your mother."

"You've never told me to answer the phone before, when she calls."

This is different, answer it."

"Mom."

"Derek Shepherd, you are in so much trouble."

"What did I do? I haven't talked to you in ..."

"That's the whole point, you ungrateful son, you haven't spoken to me.
But, I hear you have spoken to Jenna, and you even let Meredith speak with her."

"Well, Mom... it wasn't so much that I let Meredith speak to her." He felt her swat,
"she took the phone away from me."

"Really...she took the phone way from you, I can only wonder why...you made Jenna cry, Derek, and she's pregnant."

"Mom, you're not going to lay a guilt trip on me over Jenna crying, she's been doing that for years, pregnant or not, to get what she wants from me."

"Well, I'm not Jenna, and I'm not crying, I want you to tell me why in the world you have not told her you're coming home for the baptism."

"Mom, that's months away, I told her, I'd let her know next week."

"Oh. She did not tell me that."

"You really have to talk to your daughters, you know they don't always give you the full story," he joked.

"Don't go there Derek Shepherd, you'll lose on that score."

"Uhm...yes, well. Mom, how are you?"

She laughed, "I'm fine Derek. How are you, and why aren't you calling more often?"

"Just busy Mom, but you know I miss you."

"I miss you too, and I expect I'm going to see you soon, Derek, I want to see you before the baptism, I'm getting old Derek."

"Don't use that line on me. You're not old."

"I am...and that gives me certain prerogatives."

He could hear in her voice, the determination of having made up her mind.

"I'm coming to see you Derek."

"You're what?"

"Does that mean I'm not welcome?"

"No, just you haven't said anything...I've been here almost two years...and well..."

"Long enough...I'm coming to see you...you're time's up Derek, this summer, either you come home, or I'm coming to see you."

"Mom...I'm really busy, I'm not sure."

"You can certainly afford to fly home, even if it's for a weekend, so no more excuses. You come home by summer, or I'm coming to see you."

"I'll let you know... I'll let you know..."

"See that you do... and Derek, I want to meet Meredith."

"You do?"

"Yes, it's time."

"Yes, Mom, it is time you meet Meredith," he said getting up and standing in front of her.

Meredith stared at him and mouthed, "no."

"She's going to love meeting you and you're going to love her," he said smiling and reaching for her hand pulled her from her seat and brought her down to sit on his lap.

"Are you with her now, I mean she was with you earlier."

"Yes, Mom, Meredith is with me now, actually she's in the kitchen," he smiled, knowing she could hear his mother's conversation when she buried her face in his neck and giggled.

"Well, you tell her I'm looking forward to meeting her, and that I don't bite, and that she doesn't have to worry about Nancy, I will keep that girl in line."

"I'll tell her Mom, I know she'll appreciate that."

"I love you son."

"I love you Mom."

"What the hell did you just do?"

"I told my mom it was time you met."

"I could hear that Derek, but... I can't... Derek, I'm not good with Mom's."

"Meredith, you agreed to fly home with me for Jenna's baby..."

"I know... I just didn't think... you know, the mom thing..."

"I had to tell her yes, she threatened to visit."

"Here, to Seattle...Derek, what if she does...what do we do?"

"We take her out to dinner, spend time with her."

"That's not what I mean."

"Relax, I held her off a bit...it will be fine."

"You know what...it will... I can't be like this...and hell, there's therapy, so that will help...right, Derek? That will help me deal with all these things...before I meet your mom."

"Yes, that will help, and I will help..." he said and kissed her softly drawing her close.
"Speaking of which, when is your appointment? I want to make sure I'm free."

"I told you...you don't have to come with me... the first appointment."

"I know I don't, I just want to be available, in case you change your mind, I want to be there for you."

"You'd want to come?"

"Yes...in case you need me."

"I always need you."

"As I do."

They finished cleaning up around them. "Derek, we can't leave any crumbs around."

"No, wouldn't want to attract any bears," he joked and both laughed, ending up in each other's arms.

He sat down and brought her down to sit on his lap.

"Derek, tonight," she said as he heard the emotion in her voice, "tonight, was so special, I'll never forget this... the first time we came to see this site."

"Neither will I... tonight was magic ...not because of the beauty of this place, but because of you...you brought magic to our life tonight."

Before he knew it, she wrapped herself around him and cried, and he held her, letting her emotions touch his soul.

"Derek..."

"Uhmmm..."

"I want dessert."

"I was wondering how long that was going to take."

"What did you get?"

"You'll like it... trust me."

He opened the cooler and brought two containers. One coffee, the other chocolate.

"Derek...you went to Mora's."

"I thought that might be your reaction...though I'm feeling a bit jealous you're more enthused about the ice cream... then feeding other appetites..."

"You'll be well rewarded...for your patience...trust me..."

The both laughed, and he smiled looking at her savoring the ice cream.

"Oh...Derek... these are new flavors," she said looking at the labels, "this chocolate is wonderful... "

"Let me taste..."

"You want chocolate?"

"From the look of your face, I've got to find out what I'm missing..."

"Italian chocolate ...with cognac and walnuts," she said feeding him a spoonful.

"Very good..."

"Swiss with chocolate liqueur and dulce de leche..." she fed him, purposely leaving a trail of ice cream on his lips, and leaned in to lick it off and kiss him.

"Uhmmm...my new favorite flavor..."

They sat without regard for time, content to be holding each other, but as the evening wore on, they made allowances for the dipping temperatures and wrapped themselves around the blanket he'd brought with him.

"Hey, it's getting late, we should go."

"I hate for tonight to end..." she whispered sleepily.

"It's only the begging Meredith... the beginning of many nights like this."

"Derek..."

"Yes..."

"You didn't answer me."

"About what?"

"The bears."

"I know as much as you do," he admitted, "but Meredith I think it was a fluke, they swam over the sound, and when they saw people were scared away and were seen going back to the water."

"Did...did you just say, they... as in more than one?"

"Yes, but, they didn't stay, they're frightened of people."

"Derek, I really love this site, and it can be our special... magical place..."

"I hear a but..."

"You do... because, we can't live here, it's not safe... Derek... a cliff and bears...it's not safe...not for my babies," she smiled and kissed him lightly, "our babies Derek...all three of them...have to be safe."

"Three...huh...look at that...how far we've come tonight...."

"Oh... it's not tonight, I told you Derek...my dream...in my dream...our family...it's three kids...are you up to it?"

"That's a rather unfair way to phrase things right now, don't you think?"

"Gutter brain Derek...I really need to limit the time you spend with Mark, " she teased.

"Your new best friend."

"My new best friend."

"Meredith...I'm up to the challenge...to make that dream come true."

"I'm counting on it."

"Ready to go home? "

"Let's go."

"Stay here for a few minutes, while I carry things to the car."

"You're going to leave me here alone...Derek, in the dark... with bears roaming around?"

"I can always come back and get everything tomorrow."

"That's a very good idea...let's just take the cooler, so they can't find any food."

He laughed, and reaching for her hand walked with her to the car, a flashlight on the other hand.

"I'm going to get the cooler, think you'll be ok."

"I can manage... in the car with the doors locked."

"I love you."

"Derek," she said softly, "thank you for tonight...our magical night."