(Shattered...) Dreams Fulfilled

Hope Restored

Derek had not been able to get much sleep at the trailer, and at five o'clock decided to give in and driven to Meredith's as he'd wanted to since he'd spoken to her. Now, as he held her close, he smiled and marveled at the changes that had taken place in the last few hours.

She'd told him she was going to let him take care of her, of them, and that as well as so many other heartfelt confessions and tiny miracles had restored his hope.

Kathleen was going to kill him, was his first thought. She'd emailed him with the flight information, telling him she did not want to call, hoping he was getting some sleep. He'd made her fly out across the country at a moment's notice, and now he felt he was on top of the world. However, he did not allow himself to become complacent, and acknowledged that the reasons for his call, for seeking her out in his moment of desperation still remained, and she would understand. He and Meredith may have reached an understanding, an acceptance of the need and desire to make their relationship work, but the facts of their deep rooted doubts and fears urgently required to be addressed.

Meredith had taken the first step and would be going to therapy. Now, it was his turn to delve deep within and confront his own long buried emotions.

Her snoring was a source of comfort, knowing she was sound asleep and getting much needed rest, but he'd have to wake her soon. She stirred slightly, and he felt her tighten her hold around his waist snuggling closer, and he kissed her forehead lightly trying not to wake her just yet, but unable to keep himself from expressing his love for her in every way, every time he could.

"Uhmmm...so tired...so sleepy."

"You don't have to get up yet," he whispered.

"I do."

"You can sleep another fifteen minutes."

"Can't," she said and began to pull away from his embrace, "your son is making his presence felt already...I have to go to the bathroom."

"My son..."

"Yeah...he's yours only right now..." she said getting out of bed and walking away to return a few minutes later.

"So...he's my son when he's giving you a hard time," he teased her, as he reached out for her hand and pulled her softly into his embrace.

"I'm kidding, he's my baby...our baby Derek, and I love him...or her...so much already."

"I love our baby too...him or her...and their mommy."

"I love you Derek."

"Thank you...for last night, and this morning..."

She met his gaze, "you're thanking me for the awful things I said and made you feel."

"I'm thanking you for all that happened later," he told her while lacing their fingers together, "for reaching out to me...for letting me know you needed me," he paused and brushed her lips, "for all you've said...all you've given me...for wanting to make our relationship work, for believing in me, even when you did not what happened..." he leaned in kissing her and caressing her face, "for trusting me with your heart again...for loving our very unexpected baby...for loving me...for restoring my hope for us," he ended, unable to keep the raw emotion hidden from his voice.

"Derek," she whispered against his lips, "you've done all those things for me too...and I promised you...I do...I'd make up for hurting you last night...and I will."

"Hey...enough of that talk...we're going to do this together."

"I love you...well, actually..." she said as she placed his hand on her abdomen and covered it with hers, "we love you Derek."

"I love you too...both of you."

They soon heard the commotion of the house coming alive with the early morning rush to get to the hospital.

"I wish I had a whole day to sleep..."

"Are you feeling ok?"

"Yes, I am...but I never realized what was happening..." she said, and stopped talking to punch him gently, "and wipe that smirk of your face...I've already accepted that you knew before I did..."

"I didn't say anything..."

"You didn't have to...I can read the look in your eyes."

"Answer my question, do you think you need to stay home and get some rest...you could come back after we..."

"I'm fine...rather, I'm great...ok," she kissed him, " except now I know why I've been walking around exhausted for over a week and my bladder feels the way it does and I'm running to the bathroom all the time."

"At least there's been no morning sickness..."

"You're right...not much of that..."

"Are you ready?"

"You mean for me to start getting fat..." she said as she placed her hand on her protectively over her abdomen.

"I told you...I can't wait till our baby starts growing...and I can see the changes in your body."

"Derek...I've a confession to make..."

"A confession..." he said as he raised his eyebrow.

"Are you making fun of me...cause I won't ell you..."

"I'm not...but you have to admit...a confession..."

"Well, sort of...you know...I've already noticed changes in my body..."

"You have..." he asked with a sense of excitement in his voice, "I haven't..."

"I know...I'm sorry...I think it's just that...well, you know...since we haven't really...well, lately...we haven't..."

"Had sex."

"Yes...and if we had been...you'd probably have noticed too... cause, it's not like...well, Derek, when we make love...you do pay attention to every inch of my body."

"Then I guess you're going to be late this morning..."

"Derek...I can't be late..."

"I'm not leaving here till I discover those changes for myself..."

"We can't... you know we can't...the cramping, Derek...we have to wait...just till we know...that everything is ok."

"I know that, but that does not mean I can't pay attention to every inch of your body right now..."

"Dr. Shepherd...I'd love to stay in bed with you right now...but, honestly, I have to get to the hospital, and we need to get there earlier so we can get my blood work..."

"You... Dr. Grey...are a tease...and you're really going to have to make up for that...for the past ten days or so..."

"I will...I will make it worth your while..." she said kissing him lightly at first, then deepening the kiss, leaving them both breathless, "I promise you...all of your favorite things."

"Oh God..." he groaned, "you are definitely trying to kill me, but payback Meredith...payback is going to be hell..."

"I can't wait," she teased and quickly got out of bed to get dressed.

Derek went downstairs determined to make her eat a healthy breakfast and found Lexie in the kitchen.

"Derek, is something wrong, is Mer ok?"

"Yes, she's ok. I drove here early this morning."

"Oh thank God, I know she was very upset last night, but I'm so glad you're here."

"Hey, Lexie, thank you for being with her last night. She told me you talked, and you told her what happened at Joe's, and you being there, it means a lot to her."

"It means a lot to me too. Derek, do you really think...I mean...I think she's ok...with me...and we're getting closer...more like sisters..."

"She is...just like I told you a long while ago...the two of you would be fine."

"I don't mean to pry...but...well...things last night...they were kind of...not ok...and now you're here...so everything worked out...you talked..."

"Yes, everything worked out. We have a lot to work through, but we're going to make it...you'll see," he said and went over to her and kissed her on the cheek, "thank you, again, for being there for her."

Meredith walked in and smiled, "Derek! Lexie! I thought you two assured me there was nothing between you, and here I walk in the kitchen and what...the two of you kissing...how am I supposed to trust either one of you," she continued as she made her way to stand next to them.

"Meredith, there's nothing..."

"Mer...really... he was just saying..."

Meredith stood in front of them and smiled, while reaching to grasp each of their hands in hers. Surprising and actually shocking them both, she gave her sister a kiss on the cheek, "thank you, for being there for me, for caring..." and then, kissed him on the lips, "thank you for caring and loving me so much."

"Meredith Grey, that was mean and not nice...and well, you don't to that...I thought...you were serious...and not nice Mer..."

"Lexie, I think you better get used to the tease in your sister...it's a recent discovery...and I can guarantee it's not going to go away anytime soon, since she's determined to kill me...and her new method was a heart attack."

"If I thought for one minute there was anything going on, I'd wouldn't have waited for a heart attack...you'd both..."

"Yeah, well you did pretty well this morning..." he muttered.

"Derek did you say something?"

"What would you like to eat this morning?"

She laughed and embraced him. "I love you."

"Somehow...I know I missed something...guys, I have to go, see you at the hospital."

"Lex, did you find the apartment, did you take it?"

"Yeah...we did, it needs a lot of work."

"Ok...maybe I can go with you to see it on my day off."

"That sounds good."

"Thanks again Lexie, for last night."

"You're welcome Derek, glad you talked some sense into her."

"Hey, wait a minute, who says it wasn't the other way around?"

"Mer...I saw you...talked to you last night...Derek wasn't irrational, you were."

"Still, I thought you were on my side."

"I am...that's why I'm glad he's going to be my brother in law...one day..."

"Oh... shut up...and go away..." she teased her, but realized Lexie did not know she was joking when she saw the slightly disappointed look on her sister's face.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to ...I'll see you later..."

"Lexie," she said walking over to her and stopped her from leaving, "I'm just kidding...I'm happy, really happy...that you and Derek have this ...this whatever you call it...and he is going to be your brother in law...maybe...sooner than you think..."

"We're ok?"

"We're more than ok...you're my sister...and I think...we're going to be very good friends."

"I don't have many friends here you know..."

"You have me now..."

Derek watched the exchange, not hearing all they said, as they both spoke in low tones and the similarities were striking, the rambling, the doubts he just witnessed in accepting each other, even in the way they reflected their emotions in their eyes. He was amazed at the change in Meredith towards Lexie, and knew that familial bond was something Meredith longed for unknowingly.

"Xena...one and two...I think...you both need to get to work..."

"Oh shut up..." they both said simultaneously.

"That's right... what do I know...Meredith, come have breakfast. Lexie, get to work."

"Bye Lex, your brother in law is being bossy."

"See you guys at the hospital."

"Hope you fixed something good for breakfast."

"Cereal & fruit, you need that."

"Derek, I really would like a grilled cheese sandwich."

"Forget it, your eating healthy this morning."

"I can't believe it," she said as she slipped into his arms, "barely pregnant, and already you won't satisfy my cravings."

"Your unhealthy food cravings...but I'm ready to satisfy all others..."

"Who's being a tease now..." she said, nibbling at his lower lip...

"Quit while you're ahead, let's eat breakfast."

The ride to the hospital gave them an opportunity to continue talking, and both were unable to disguise their excitement about their baby.

"Derek, I think I want to tell Lexie pretty soon about the baby."

"You do...what about the others? You're not going to tell Cristina, Mer I thought that two of you were ok."

"The minute I tell Cristina, I know what here reaction will be, and I don't want that, Derek, I don't want anybody telling me I'm making a mistake...or that I should consider my options, because there are no options...you already now this...how I feel, how I felt even when I thought you had gone crazy, asking me if I was pregnant...I don't want an option...other than having our baby."

"And you think Lexie won't say that...that same advise?"

"Of course not, and we've talked about it...babies that is...and she already suspects, so once we know for sure...I want to tell her, but not everybody, not right away, you know," she said reaching for his hand, "until we know there's nothing wrong."

"She suspects...and you didn't tell me...and you talked about babies..."

"I wasn't necessarily admitting it till yesterday, so I wasn't about to tell you she thought I was pregnant too, and we talked about lots of things including future babies."

"Really, so your sister and...boyfr..." he stopped, and pulled his hand from hers.

"Derek, don't you dare pull a Meredith on me..."

"What are you talking about...pull a Meredith," he had to laugh, though he knew it was no laughing matter.

"Yes, you just started to say something, and you didn't know how I was going to react, so you pulled your hand away...and are trying to avoid the subject."

"You got all of that from me pulling my hand away."

"Yes."

"Amazing."

"Don't you dare mock me...Derek...you...we promised no avoiding...no pulling away."

"Yes, yes we did."

"Why did you stop...you started to say you were my boyfriend..."

"I did."

"Why?"

"Because we haven't really talked about it, and it may get a bit awkward now...once you start to show...just thinking ahead."

"What would you like to say?"

"I'm perfectly fine just saying you're the woman I love."

"Do we have to decide right now?"

"No, we don't, we can take all the time in the world to figure it out," he reassured her by taking her hand and bringing it to his lips.

"We won't take long...I mean, you and Lexie seem to have some insight into you being her brother in law."

"Yes, we absolutely do," he laughed.

"Derek..."

"Meredith..."

"You're both right..."

He roared, "you are going to pay for every time you teased, and every time you chose the moments I'm driving to render me speechless."

"I love you Derek."

"And now she copies my tactics."

She laughed, "in fact, I love you very much. Right, baby, we love your daddy."

He placed his hand on her belly and gently caressed her, "I love you very much too."

They walked from the parking lot to an exam room holding hands until he locked the door behind him.

"This is it," he said, "are you ready?"

"I'm ready," she said biting her lower lip, "ready for the rest of our lives."

He brought her close to him and held her for several minutes in his embrace, then walked her over to sit at the patient's examination table, and he gathered what he needed and sat on the lower stool.

Putting on gloves he then wiped her arm and smiled, "I know you hate this, but I'll be gentle, you won't feel a thing."

"Right..."

"I can be gentle, don't look," he said before locating her vein, and continued to talk to her, "you really should know better by now, I'm excellent at doing this."

"Derek, I don't care for chit chat right now..."

"You don't have to. We're done."

"We're done?"

"Yes...now keep your arm bent."

"I know that."

"Of course you do, you're a doctor...a doctor who had no idea she was pregnant."

"Derek, that is not fair," she said, watching as he capped the tube, and started to write the label, M.Grey.

"No, don't use my name, the entire hospital will know before even we find out."

"You want to use my name..." he teased.

"They'll figure that out, give me a minute," she said as he rose from the chair, holding the glass tube, and as she looked up to him, their gazes locked, neither willing to break the spell that bound them, recognizing that the information to be confirmed from that small vial, would change their lives forever.

She leaned in and gathered him close. "I love you Derek...now that I've said it, I can't say it enough."

"I can't hear it enough...I love you too, Meredith. I'm here...I'll be here for you, always."

"I know...I have no doubts...and so will I."

She pulled out of his embrace, and reached for the pen and label, and began to write, as she saw him smile. D.C. Maloney.

Both laughed, as he said, "they will never know."

"Not till we're ready to tell them."

"I'll drop it off, they won't question my orders."

"Maybe you shouldn't rush it, you know...since there's no patient with that name."

"I'll take care of it...I'll be back after I get Kathleen."

"You...you're going to bring her by here...I have to meet her, here...at the hospital."

"You don't have to... I could pass you in the hall, and avoid you, and wait till tonight to give you the test results."

"Don't you dare..."

"You made me wait...to explore....the changes in your body, it's only fair."

"Derek..."

"Meredith..."

"You're going to make me wait..." she said, pouting slightly.

"Not for a minute, I'll be back as soon as I can."

"Promise."

"You won't even have to meet Kathleen if you don't want, not till tonight."

"Derek..."

"Yes..."

"She's going to be my sister in law...just make sure she knows...not like Nancy."

"She will know...she certainly will know..."

"I love you."

"I love you too...but Meredith...my whole family...and even the hospital...thanks to your bonding session with Mark in the OR...they already know..."