"Hi girls," Meredith said as she walked in the nursery and Jennifer was sitting in the rocking chair holding the baby, with a couple of the girls standing around talking to her, and the others sitting on the floor playing with Katies's paper doll stage. "I was wondering if you'd share her with me a little bit," she said, and as her voice got closer the baby turned her face.
"Aunt Meredith," Jennifer smiled, "it's really true, Mom was saying how she seems to know your voice, which is really unusually babies this small normally recognize their parents voices...but she really looks for you..."
"That's cause she the godmother," Meghan said, "right Aunty M...and see I got it right...I know the name now..."
"Meggie," Meredith smiled, "you did get it right...I'm her godmother," and she reached to take the baby from Jennifer, and then sat on the rocking chair and spoke to the baby as well as having a conversation with the rest of the girls.
"Aunt Meredith," Amanda, Nancy's ten year old said, "I told Mom I really want to visit, and she said we were going to, but that we have to wait till summer and that is not fair...will you tell her it's ok...that we can visit sooner...please..."
"It's not fair," Emma said, "if you get to visit first...Mom got to meet Aunt Meredith first so I should get to go first...isn't that right Aunt Meredith?"
"No," Rebecca, Nancy's eight year old said, "that's not true, my Mom met her first...she went to Seattle to see Uncle Derek when he didn't show up Thanksgiving or Christmas."
"Stop being silly," Caroline, Nancy's twelve year old said, "it doesn't matter who got to meet her first. You can visit whenever it works for the adults, not the little kids."
"Yes, it does matter," Emma said, "because...my Mommy loves Aunt Meredith right from the first day she met her ...and Aunt Nancy was mean when she visited, and I heard Mommy say to stop being..." and complete silence followed, "she used the bad word."
"Emma," Meredith said, wanting to kill Derek for not being there and get out of this predicament, "sweetie...your Aunt Nancy did come to visit first, because she was concerned about your Uncle Derek, that she had not seen him in a long time, and she was only there for one day, so we didn't spend a lot of time together. Your mommy and I had a lot of days to spend together and we got to know each other first, but I also had time to spend with your Aunt Nancy and Maggie and Jenna when we visited a few months ago, and you are all going to get to come visit us in Seattle."
"But," Emma said, "my Mommy and Daddy...they visited and went camping...and..."
"Honey," Meredith reached to touch the little girl's face, "it doesn't matter who visited already, ok...you'll get to visit, all of you will."
"I goes with Emma," Meghan said, "and Katie...cause we're the little ones...we gets to go first," she said, and Meredith knew she was way in over her head.
"Girls," Jennifer said, "how about we go see what Mrs. Jane is making for dinner."
"No," Katie said, "I like being here with my sisters and Aunt Merdith."
"It's ok," Meredith smiled at Jennifer, "I think," she laughed.
"It's not easy," Nancy oldest daughter smiled at her, "believe me."
"You've got eleven younger ones to deal with," Meredith smiled at her.
"Aunt Meredith," Caroline interrupted, "I haven't played with dolls in a long time, but the one you brought for Kerry is really beautiful," she smiled, "I have a doll collection, from different countries...and this one has one of the prettiest faces."
"I'm glad you liked her," Meredith said, "it reminded me of Kerry's chubby cheeks and I wanted the first doll to be from her godparents."
"She's going to love her," Caroline said, "I bet it's going to be her favorite gift."
"Thank you Caroline," Meredith told her, "that means a lot to me, especially since you used to collect dolls," careful not to suggest she may still be interested in them.
"I still collect them," Caroline smiled, "just don't play with them anymore."
"I'll keep that in mind," Meredith told her.
"Need help in here," Carolyn appeared in the doorway.
"Granma," Amanda said, "we're trying to figure out who gets to visit Seattle first and stay at the trailer."
"You need help," Carolyn sighed, and walked over to Meredith and rested her hand on her shoulder, and said quietly, "you ok?"
"Yes," Meredith said and smiled, "Mom, we're just getting to know each other better."
"Your husband just got here," Carolyn told her, "and was instructed to freshen up before he could go near Kerry, the others already knew they'd have to do that," she smiled, "that will last another week...then...her philosophy will be that any germs near her will only help her immune system."
"But," Meredith said, "that's not really true...I mean...I was reading..."
"You can't protect them from everything," Carolyn squeezed her shoulder, "trust me...I raised five healthy children that were passed on from relative to relative since the day they were born...taking natural precautions of course, washing hands and the obvious...but...thank God they've been healthy as horses all their lives."
"Granma," Amanda asked, "does that mean we don't have to worry about coming in all sweaty and grimy from school...and have to wash up before holding the baby?"
"No," Carolyn said, "it does not mean that at all. Now, go on all of you. I want to spend time with your Aunt Meredith," and echo of protests followed until they had just one word of warning from their grandmother, "girls...Jenni dear, would you take them to the play room, pick a movie for them?"
"Yes," the young girl smiled at her, "Granma," and hugged her. "I love you."
"Me too sweetheart," and smiled at her lovely granddaughter.
"Is everything ok?" Meredith questioned, a hint of concern in her voice.
"I have not had a chance to talk to you," she said, "since you've been here."
"I'm ok," Meredith told her, "let's go sit at the window seat."
"You're ok," Carolyn smiled at her daughter in law, "and you're going to spoil this one...even worse than a grandmother does...Kerry Beatrice...you are a very lucky little girl," her grandmother kissed the top of her head, and the baby turned toward the voice, which she tended to do now with most sounds, but her godmother was indeed special.
"She is going to be very spoiled," Meredith said, "aren't you princess...because it's not just your godfather and I...it's everyone in the family," the baby focused intently on her godmother's face, "but...you are the most special baby to us...and you know what," she spoke tenderly to her, "I am so very certain that you have a baby angel watching over you, and her name is Brianna..."
"Oh, sweetheart," Carolyn said, once she got past the lump in her throat, "I believe she does, a beautiful baby cousin who will always be her angel," and both women smiled through the inevitable tears.
"Mom," Meredith said, "I told Kathleen...about my day with Kelly...earlier..."
"That was the reason for the long walk," Carolyn said and Meredith nodded. "Meredith, do you know how much it means to her...to me...that you can share those moments with us..."
"I do," Meredith said, "because it means everything to me...to have you...both of you."
Carolyn put her arm around her daughter in law, and Meredith rested her head on her shoulder, "I love you sweetheart."
"I love you too Mom," Meredith said, and she knew that this woman, the one she'd once feared meeting, would never let her down; would never allow her to doubt the meaning of a mother's unconditional love.
"I think," Carolyn smiled at her, "you should know...I won't be at all offended if you decide to stay here tonight."
"Mom...I ...we...plan on staying with you..."
"I know, but you'd rather spend time here...with her...and I think that is where you need to be. They have a way," Carolyn told her, "these tiny miracles that come into our lives...of healing our hearts...and making us love them so completely..."
"I am totally in love with her," Meredith sniffled, "and I think...in his own way...God has talked to us...touched our hearts...through her...and she has made the sadness in so many ways go away...because I know...one day...we'll have our own Mom...like Derek told me...our own little miracles..."
"Sweetheart," Carolyn met her gaze, "I have no doubts...about that...and I'm going to be there...right beside you...for each one of them."
"That's what Kathleen said," Meredith laughed softly.
"She will be," Carolyn said, "and I think you may have a hard time keeping the others away, especially the first time you give birth."
"Derek's first born," Meredith smiled, "welcomed by his grandmother and all his aunts."
"They'll be there...for their brother and their sister...you've become that, I hope you realize that's what you are to all of them."
"I know," Meredith smiled, "and I'm learning...all about family," she said and recounted the earlier conversation with her nieces and they were laughing when Jenna walked in.
"You are just like your aunts," Jenna walked over and kissed the baby, who was focused on her godmother's face and apparently listening very attentively, "aren't you...nosy and not wanting to be left out of any conversation," the baby made some involuntary gurgling noise as the three women watched smiling, "and...your Aunt Meredith is being very territorial isn't she sweetie..." the baby was listening to her mother's every word, "and you've been too content here...with your cousins and godmother...and Granma, forgetting all about your Mommy...who is hoping you're hungry..."
"She's been very quiet," Meredith said, "that's unusual...it's been almost three hours since she ate."
"Yes," Jenna said, "and she had a bottle with her last feeding so it's been almost five hours...I'm going to see if she wants to eat now," she reached for the baby, who immediately turned her head to her mother's breast and opened her mouth. "Mom," do you mind getting me the bunny blanket," she asked, and made herself comfortable against the pillows, surprising Meredith when she unclasped her nursing bra and put the baby to her breast and the baby latched on immediately.
"She is a little piglet," Meredith said, and then a bit shy, "you don't mind...that I'm here...and Mom..."
"I don't do this in public," Jenna told her, "or in front of everyone, but you're a doctor...and you're my sister...and it's the most natural thing in the world...and her godmother," she smiled, "that didn't want her being called a little piglet," the baby was not stopping to listen to any voices at this time, "until you saw for yourself."
"It is better for them," Meredith said, "they should be breast fed...if I have kids..."
"I thought," Jenna said, "you were on board to help with some of those six grandkids..."
"I am," Meredith smiled, "just...have to get used to the idea. I didn't really think I'd have kids before your brother came into my life."
"I promise you," Jenna said, "when you are pregnant the first time...you'll probably freak out a little...I did, and then you feel the baby for the first time...and then...when you hold them...and the first time they do this," she smiled at the baby, her hand gently caressing her daughter's head, "you know what love and life are truly all about."
"The first time," Meredith said, and her mother in law discreetly put her arm around her waist letting her know she was there, offering comfort and understanding, "you're probably right."
Jenna detected a hint of sadness in Meredith, and didn't quite understand, but she said, "Mer...before you leave tonight, you should feed her, spend time with her."
"I'd like that," Meredith told her sister in law, "but...I was thinking...if you don't mind...we'll stay here again tonight..."
"Mom," Jenna looked at her mother's reaction.
"She already asked me, if my feelings would be hurt...they won't be...and I'm going to mass at five thirty so I can bring the rest of your things over."
"You can't do that," Meredith said, "you can't pack for us, or clean up our room...and..."
"Is there something embarrassing amongst your things...that I can't pack for you," Carolyn asked with a deadpan expression.
"What," Meredith turned to her, "no...of course not...but..."
Jenna smiled, "I can't laugh right now, but Mom...that is just too damn embarrassing."
"Stop being a tease Jenna," Carolyn said. "Meredith, I will bring your things over tonight."
They heard Derek's laughter in the room next door, one of the girl's bedrooms.
"I guess," Meredith giggled, "I should tell him."
Carolyn and half a dozen kids went to mass along with Maggie and her husband.
The sisters and their families who had begun to arrive shortly before lunch and would stay late into the evening hours; the kids keeping themselves entertained, including several hours at the nearby park with their fathers, who would also be responsible for the evening barbecue.
Meredith joined Derek in the girl's bedroom where Emma was having a serious conversation with him and Nancy was trying not to laugh. Then, Kathleen interrupted, "Emma and Katie, go with Granma and your brothers, she's going to mass today."
"I don't want to," Emma pouted, "Mommy I want to spend time with Uncle Derek."
"Go on sweetie," Kathleen encouraged, "just think...you don't have to get up early to go with us, and your Uncle Derek is going to be here for dinner and you'll see him tomorrow before they go back home."
"Ok...Mommy," she said, "Aunt Meredith," she whispered as she stood next to her, "you promised we'd spend time together on your next trip."
"I know Emma...and I didn't know we'd be here before the baptisms, but...when we're here for that...we'll spend some time together...just the two of us...ok?"
"Uncle Derek can be there," the little girl smiled, "if you want him to."
"Let's see," Meredith hugged her, "when we come back...if we want him to go with us...or just have a girl's day out."
"Ok," Emma smiled, "bye Mommy..."
"I'm so confused," Meredith said, "I thought Catholics had mass on Sundays."
"Yes," Nancy laughed, "but years ago, I don't even remember how long ago, if you go to a vigil mass, that's the evening before, it counts as your Sunday obligation."
"Sunday obligation," Meredith repeated.
"Aunt Meredith," Jennifer said, "that's so we can avoid having to go to confession," she joked and the girls in their inimitable fashion explained the weekly ritual.
"Mom," Amanda said, "can we go with Granma too, get it over with."
"Amanda," Nancy said, "you know better than that."
"Mom," Amanda said, "just because Nicole has to sing in the choir doesn't mean we should be stuck going to the same mass every Sunday."
"Amanda," her mother warned.
"Fine," she sighed dramatically and turned to her sister. "I love you Nikki but it gets pretty boring sometimes...except when you sing solo."
"Girls go ask your father if you can help with anything," Nancy said, "and take Meggie with you."
"That means," Nicole said, "she wants us out of here."
"Aunty M," Meghan said, "you gots to stand there," she pulled on her hand, "and see if you are taller than a princess...Uncle D is way way bigger."
"I found out," Derek said, "about growth charts and the heights of princesses," he said, referring to the conversation upon their arrival and the girls comments about their height, as Meredith smiled at the growth chart on the wall depicting Disney princesses.
"You're way way bigger too Aunty M, bigger than all the princesses," she said and raised her hands to be picked up, and wrapped her hands around Meredith's waist, and then cupped her face in her small hands and smiled at her, "but you're prettier than Snow White and Cinderella."
"Thank you sweetie," I think you're prettier than all of them as well," Meredith hugged her and laughed when the little girl spoke again.
"That's silly Aunty M...cause I just a little girl."
"But," Meredith whispered, "little girls grow up and some are very special because they are beautiful inside and out...and that's what you are."
"Inside," Meghan said, "but you can't see that..."
"You can Meggie," Meredith told her, "you see with your heart...just like Princess Bella."
"Cause she saw the Beast was not ugly..." the little girl smiled in comprehension.
"Yes," Meredith said as the little girl threw her arms around her neck and hugged her tight. "I love you Aunty M."
"I love you too Meggie," Meredith said.
"I gots to go now," Meghan said, "Aunt Nancy told us..."
"I take it," Nancy said, "those late night Google searches included Disney movies," and they all laughed.
"You've told everyone," Meredith looked over to Derek.
"No," he smiled sheepishly, "just Jenna but she spreads news fast."
"Meredith," Nancy said more seriously, "I was worried about you...these days here...but..." she smiled at her, "you amaze me...how you've handled it all."
"It helped...helps...knowing all of you were there to support us, thank you, it's meant a lot to me...and Derek."
"Thank you for accepting my help and for being so forgiving...I heard about this afternoon..."
"What's going on," Derek said, not liking the comments
"Your wife," Nancy placed her hand on Meredith's arm, "of six months has earned the love and loyalty of our entire family...and my respect and admiration...and the kids are fighting to see who gets to visit first and spend time with you..."
"Thank you," Meredith said, and surprising brother and sister hugged Nancy.
"Meredith," Nancy returned the brief moment of affection, "if you need me...for anything...anytime...I'll be here."
"Can you tell me what that was all about," Derek said again, and Nancy told him how Meredith had handled the earlier disagreement with the girls.
"Jen told me her Aunt Meredith knew just the right thing to say," Nancy said, and talked of her oldest daughter with obvious pride, and Meredith smiled at having the opportunity to see the doting mother, as it continued to erase the first impression of her sister in law.
"Mom," Meredith said as they were getting ready for dinner, "where's Aunt Pat, I expected she'd be here."
"Mad as hell," Kevin commented, "that she had a retreat."
"Kevin," his mother in law said, "that is not..."
"Mom," Kevin laughed, "didn't you just come from mass..."
"Meredith did I tell you the story," Carolyn winked at her, "when my son in law Kevin first married Kathleen and..."
"Old meddling woman," Kevin retorted, "if she'd minded her own business..."
"Are you at it again," Rob laughed, "I'd be careful old man, Kat doesn't know about..."
"What don't I know about," Kathleen strolled in holding her newborn niece.
"Nothing dear," Carolyn said, "Rob's just making trouble."
Rob roared with laughter, "I'm making trouble."
"If you must know Kathleen," Carolyn said, "your husband was maligning your aunt."
"The cheating nun?" Kathleen said.
"The very same," her mother smiled, "and used the word hell in the same sentence as her retreat."
Maggie walked in at that moment, "are we talking about Aunt Pat being mad as hell she had to be at the weekend retreat?"
"The very same," Carolyn said, "but I have to say she is right, you are all very impertinent and disrespectful, she's at a spiritual retreat and somehow referring to it as hell does not seem like the right thing at all," their mother commented, and the kitchen roared with laughter as the final preparations for dinner took place.
The kids had been fed earlier and Kyle and Jennifer as the oldest of the twelve in residence, without counting Kerry, had been put in charge of watching the younger ones.
"I have to tell you, Kevin," Meredith told him as she peeked at the baby his arms, "Derek told me the story about Still Hunt, and you were an A-S-S."
"You're calling me an ..."
"I am, and don't say the word...you're holding my goddaughter..."
"Kev," Derek laughed and pulled on Meredith's hand so she was sitting on his lap, "you would have loved her reaction...she laughed."
"I figured you would," Kathleen chuckled, "especially as you two have become synonymous with roaring...and...enticing certain people to betting games..."
"Kat," Rob taunted, "you know he bet...heck...he's been bragging about it..."
"Of course I know, and Mom...made a killing as well."
"She what," several voices echoed, including Derek, Jenna and John.
"Of course she was," Kevin said and went to stand by his mother in law, who took the baby from him, "this old wily fox was right on the money..."
"You..." Derek said, "my mother...bet on ..."
"That Meredith had made the lion roar in silence," Kevin said.
"Oh my God," Meredith buried her face in his neck, and her body trembled with laugher, "Derek...do something..."
"Here..." he teased, "and now...in front of everyone..."
Meredith looked at him and laughed again, "why the hell not..." she raised an eyebrow at him suggestively, "they all seemed to bet on our sex life as well...so..." she smiled right before she captured his mouth and pretended they forgot they had any audience at all.
"Bets," Jenna said, "anyone..." and the entire room erupted in good natured laughter, and the littlest member of the family protested as she let out a loud impressive cry and her godmother rose immediately to get her.
"Kerry...sweetie, are all these loud people ignoring you," she soothed, and the baby continued to cry, "don't pay any attention to them," she snuggled her, "I'm not giving you up anymore...you can stay with me..." the baby's cries became soft whimpers as she listened to Meredith's voice, and before she put her thumb in her mouth Meredith gave her the pacifier and she settled contentedly in her godmother's arms until it was time for her next feeding.
"Mom," Maggie said, "I think you should do like Mark did...and put the money into an allowance for the future grandchildren...of course he said he's waiting to be a godfather, so Meredith and Derek..."
"You know about that?" Derek asked.
"Derek," Maggie said, "have you ever known Mark to keep a secret?"
"Yes," Meredith said without thinking. "He has. He can, if it's important enough."
"Do tell," John commented, as he and Maggie held hands.
Meredith realized what she'd said, "he won't say anything. It was that important to him...and the people he cared about, I just happened to be there, when it happened."
"Mom," Nancy changed the subject, "exactly how much money did you make?"
"Kevin dear," Carolyn said, "how much was it?"
"Few hundred dollars," he mumbled.
"A few hundred dollars," Jenna said, "are you kidding?"
"No," Kevin said, "we are not," and the family of eleven adults spent the rest of the evening relating years of anecdotes that filled the house with laughter.
"I'm going to check on the kids, it's been too quiet for comfort." Kathleen said, and it was a good twenty minutes before she came back.
"You...absolutely moron," Kathleen walked right up to Derek and smacked the back of his head, "are you out of your mind? What in the world possessed you to tell my daughter..."
"What," Derek rubbed the back of his head, "Ma...tell her she can't do that...and don't I get a chance to know what I did..."
"Fine..." Kathleen said, "you brainless idiotic moron..."
"Kathleen," her mother said, "stop calling him names..."
"Mom," she said, "I get downstairs and Emma comes up to me with a sad face and teary eyes, and wants to know why can't Mommy have another baby like Aunt Jenna...so Uncle Derek and Aunt Meredith will come stay with us...because they stayed here last night and Katie and Meghan got to wake up and cuddle...and he told her," she glared at him, "the moron...that maybe if her Mommy had a baby they'd come and stay with us too..."
"Derek," Carolyn said, "son, what in the world would possess you to say that?"
"Kat," Jenna said, "you're absolutely right...he's a moron...and brainless..."
"Derek," Maggie said, "you really are going to need a lot of kids lessons, you would think with the fourteen nieces and nephews...you'd have learned something."
"Hey," Jenna said, "it's fifteen..."
"Kerry's too young," Maggie said, "it's the others he should have learned from."
"Derek," Nancy said, "if you'd said that to Rebecca...and if by any chance I were to get pregnant...with one of those six grandkids...we'd have to pay you back..."
"Good idea," Maggie said, "we could hit him where it hurts..."
"His hair," Meredith said teasingly, "you could threaten his hair."
"I knew it," he mumbled, "completely doomed...never have a biased argument again in my life. Fine wife you are," he told her, but reached for her hand and caressed it softly, "taking their side."
"What are you mumbling about Derek," his mother said.
"Nothing."
"I'll let you win some arguments," Meredith leaned over and whispered, "as long as you..."
"I suppose," he whispered, "I can be your sex slave...anytime..."
"We both win," she kissed him softly.
"Knock it off you two," Jenna said, "I don't need to be reminded how long I have to wait, while you two enjoy..." she teased, "silent roaring...in my home.."
"Oh," Kathleen said smugly, "don't worry about that...you can bet money it won't happen tonight."
"What are you going to do honey?" Kevin nuzzled her neck, "put them in separate rooms?"
"No," she said, and as Meredith had done earlier, kissed her husband hard on the mouth, "they have Emma for the night. I told her Mommy didn't need to have another baby for her to spend the night cuddling with Uncle Derek and Aunt Meredith, she's spending the night with them tonight."
"She's what?" Derek said.
"You heard me," Kathleen told him. "I told her Uncle Derek wanted her to stay here tonight, and she could cuddle with them all night long."
Derek's expression was priceless, "you're joking?"
"I'm not," Kathleen said.
Meredith giggled, and whispered, "don't worry...I'll make it up to you...trust me..."
"Meredith," Kathleen winked at her before she spoke more seriously, "you are going to have my daughter in that room, don't you dare do anything that will scar her for life, and you should know," she teased, "she's a very light sleeper," and the room was filled with laughter again, but by this time, Kerry Beatrice was used to the increasing decibels and slept right through it.
"You know I love you," Kathleen said as she hugged her brother before the end of the evening.
"I do know," Derek said, "even if you are mean and nasty and interfering..."
"Wanna bet," she teased him.
"You are, aren't you?" he chuckled.
"Emma adores you Derek, she always did...and I didn't want her feeling left out, she's only seven...and she doesn't understand why you can be here and not with us...and you know what," she rested her head on her brother's shoulder.
"Share your secret," he hugged his sister, his confidant.
"If Kevin hadn't had a vasectomy...I know you'll think I'm crazy...but if it were possible for me to get pregnant, even now, at my age...I wouldn't mind..."
"I know Kathleen," he smiled at her.
"I talked to Mer today," she told him, "she's fine Derek...she's grown so much, emotionally she's healed so much," she told him of their conversation, knowing she was not betraying her sister in law's confidence, as Meredith had told her she hoped she and Derek would have a chance to talk as well and he could confide in her.
"Kathleen," Derek told her, "just when I think there's no way I could possibly love her more...I discover that I do...and we're going to be just fine...this trip, I was against it, but it was a blessing...for us both, and the baby..." he shook his head, sentimental tears in his eyes, "Kerry Beatrice...a fitting name, she's has truly brought such joy to our lives."
"I told her," Kathleen said, "I will be there...for your firstborn...whenever that happens...she will have her family there," she said, "count on it," she smiled.
"I am," Derek told her, and hugged her tight, "I am."
It was after ten when everyone went home, except Emma who was thrilled to be spending the night, and over an hour ago had succumbed to sleep and was sprawled in the middle of the guest bedroom's queen size bed.
Derek and Rob were outside, smoking a cigar; Meredith and Jenna were sitting in the living room, for once Kerry was not in someone's arms, but had been asleep in the moses basket for over an hour and now began to whimper and then somehow managed to have her whole hand in her mouth and began to make suckling sounds.
"Mer," Jenna said as she lifted the baby from the basket, "do you mind...if I feed her here?"
"No," Meredith told her, "should I get you a burp cloth and a blanket?"
"Please," Jenna said, as her daughter latched on as though she hadn't been fed in days, "ouch..."
"Does it hurt?" Meredith asked when she heard her.
"Not really," Jenna smiled at her, and when Meredith returned the two sisters in law sat and spoke as they did every night while the little one kept her mother up.
"Honey," Rob said, as he bent down and kissed his wife, "you've had two long tiring days...we should go up to bed, they'll be here most of tomorrow."
Derek sat on the other side of Meredith and put his arm around her, "hey...we should call it an early night, of sorts," he said, as it was after eleven, "we have a long flight tomorrow and early morning shift on Monday."
"We'll be gaining three hours," she kissed him back, "on the way home."
"True," he whispered, "but I don't plan on sleeping when we get home," she smiled, "make up for tonight."
"Derek," Jenna laughed, "I can hear you."
"So what," Derek chuckled, "you know about sex."
"Not for a while," she sighed, and smiled at her husband, "but she's worth the wait."
"Jenna," Meredith said, "she'll wake up in about two hours...and eat again?"
"Yeah," Jenna smiled, "you know her schedule...she's had you up lots of nights."
"Then," Meredith said, "she'll sleep about four hours...till six or so..."
"Yes," Jenna looked at her with an odd expression.
"I was thinking," Meredith said, "if you want... you can get a full night's sleep...I mean...you can put her bassinet in our room...and I can give her a bottle tonight...and then bring her to you in the morning...but you can sleep at least six or seven hours...if you want I can watch her...I mean I understand you may not...I don't have too much experience...but I can feed her and I've changed her plenty of times now..."
"She's yours," Jenna said, "yes...of course you can watch her...Mer...I haven't had a full night's sleep in about a week...because even when Rob feeds her at night...I can hear her...but...that would be heavenly."
"You're going to let her sleep in another room," Rob asked incredulously, "out of your sight?"
"She's with her godmother," Jenna told him, "I trust her...completely."
"What am I?" Derek said, "I've had more experience with kids..."
"You," Jenna said, "are clueless...Mer has more sense about this...and she's the one I'm trusting with my baby," then she smoothed it over a bit, "and I'm trusting you will help her," she said, and somehow she sensed, even before Meredith has asked, that the bonding between her daughter and her godparents had been fated long before.
"I'm not sure," Derek told her, "that's reassuring."
"I'm trusting you with my baby...she has not spent a night away from my presence...ever," Jenna told him, and he saw the tears in her eyes, and as the siblings gaze met, they knew it was the first of many times she would entrust her precious child to their care.
The bassinet was placed right next to Meredith's side of the bed and Jenna changed and dressed the baby before she hugged and kissed her daughter repeatedly and put her down to sleep. "You'll hear her whimper just a bit," Jenna told Meredith, "and she may cry...it depends...but don't worry about it, it's ok...you already know if the hands or thumb make it to her mouth she's about ready to eat, and once you feed her and burp her, you'll want to change her and then...just hold her for a little while...she'll take the pacifier and she'll go right to sleep for at least four hours. When she wakes up in the morning...just bring her to us...and you can go back to sleep."
"I think we can manage," Meredith said, " go get some rest," she met her sister in law's glimmering eyes, "I'm going to take care of her...just as if she were my own..."
"I know you will," Jenna said and gave her daughter one more kiss goodnight.
Derek wrapped his arms around his wife's waist, his chin on the crook of her neck as they watched the sleeping baby. "I love you."
"I love you too," she said as she wrapped his arms tighter around her.
"Meredith," he whispered, "are you ok?"
"I'm perfect," she said, "right at this moment everything is just perfect...can you feel it Derek...the sense of peacefulness around us...Kerry Beatrice...a beautiful blessing in our life. I told your Mother, I believe she has a baby angel...watching over her...I believe she's watching over her right now..."
"Our baby," Derek said, "her cousin's angel..."
"Yes," Meredith said.
"I can feel it," Derek said, "the peacefulness of it all," and he hugged her to him before turning her to face him and kissing her softly, tenderly, as they sealed, yet once more, the commitment of their love for a lifetime.
Meredith was up before Kerry's first whimper and stood over the bassinet smiling as the baby's routine was executed perfectly, one tiny fist against the mouth, a little whimper, a little louder one...almost like a soft whine...then the thumb in the mouth...and the tiny suckling motion of her mouth, and she picked her up and held her close to her, and sat back against the headboard and waited for her to open her eyes and try to focus in the barely lit room, "hey baby...I'm not supposed to talk to you too much...just feed you...and then we can get you back to sleep," the baby snuggled closer to her, the little mouth open and turning to her breast, and this time, it didn't feel as though a million pins were pricking at her heart, and she smiled in anticipation of the day she'd have her own baby at her breast, "we have a bottle for you Kerry Beatrice, that's such a beautiful name...and it suits you," she said, as she settled the baby and placed the bottle in her mouth, and she smiled as the baby latched on to the nipple and drank.
"Mer," Derek mumbled, "you ok?"
"Feeding Kerry," she whispered.
Derek immediately became alert, and marveled at the sight of his wife feeding their goddaughter, and offered a silent prayer, "God, thank you...for helping her to heal...for giving us this opportunity to have a baby in our lives...and not feel the pain of our loss...for allowing us to feel the hope that we will have our own. Hey, Dad...this little one...Kerry Beatrice...she's a beauty...a true dark Irish...like you...she has your hair and eyes...and dad...I don't know how it works up there...where you are...but I'm trusting Meredith's dream, that you are watching our little one," and he swore he heard his father's voice..."I am...we are..." and then Derek continued his silent conversation as he turned on his side and watched over the woman he adored. "Dad, if Ellis is there...I hope she knows her daughter is truly extraordinary..." and again his father's voice penetrated his mind, "she knows..." and then, "daddy...I love you lots and lots," and he felt the sting of tears.
"Derek...are you ok?" Meredith asked.
"I am..." he said, "because I have you in my life..."
"Do not," she said, as she sniffled, "make me cry," and he leaned over the sleeping seven year old and kissed his wife's lone tear away.
"I adore you Meredith," he said.
"So do I," she smiled at him, and turned to the baby, "yes little one, we love you too."
Derek burped the baby and began to feed her, but she was fussy and Meredith took her back and she settled against her godmother and ate.
"She is already spoiled," Derek teased quietly, "and has her preference..."
"She's just a baby," Meredith told him, "and I have boobs...like her Mommy...I understand they prefer to snuggle that way..."
"I'm sure they do," Derek teased her.
"You can't do that," Meredith said, "when I'm holding a baby," she smiled.
"Because..." Derek taunted.
"It's inappropriate..."
"Really," he said, "inappropriate..."
"Be quiet..." she giggled.
The baby was fed, burped and changed and when Meredith watched over her for fifteen minutes and was certain she was safe and sound, turned to her husband.
"Derek," she whispered, as she reached for his hand and entwined their fingers, "you know what..."
"What?"
"I think Kat was taking bets that we'd have a roaring night..."
"I believe that sounds like my sister...she practically issued a challenge," he whispered.
"Care to..." Meredith smiled.
"A quickie..." Derek grinned.
"A shower quickie..." she smiled, and jumped out of bed, and he followed quickly.
"Mer..." he said, as the warm water continued flowing, "we've become silent experts..."
"We have," she said breathlessly, and pressed her lips together to keep from crying out as she felt the first thrust as he joined their bodies, and then he would silence her moans with his mouth as they repeatedly reached fulfillment, the running water the only witness to their silent sounds of ecstasy.
"I could kill you," she giggled, "for getting my hair wet...now I have to use the dryer."
"It's not my fault," he turned on the dryer so she could dry her hair, though she'd insisted in throwing on her bathrobe as soon as they got out of the shower and first went to check on the baby. "That you are ...shit...wait..." he said, and turned of the dryer, there was a gentle knock on the door, and he knew who it was.
"Emma, sweetie," Derek said, "what are you doing up?"
The little girl rubbed her eyes, "there was a noise...like Mommy's hair dryer...and it woke me up...and now I got to go to the bathroom," she said.
"Ok," he said, relieved that they were both dressed in pajamas.
"Uncle Derek," the little girl asked, "why are you in the bathroom with Aunt Meredith, it's the middle of the night?"
"Why don't you go to the bathroom," he said, and pulled Meredith out.
"We are dead," Meredith started to ramble, "she will never trust me again...she leaves the baby with me and I'm having sex...in the bathroom...Derek...she's never..."
"She knows we would have sex," Derek told her, "she said as much," he reminded her of Jenna's comment earlier, "and you now Kathleen bet on it...and hell...Mer...you checked on the baby...and she's fine...and we weren't in there...but ...well...it wasn't long."
"I'm going back to sleep now," Emma told them. "Will you cuddle with me?"
"Yes, sweetie," Meredith said, "I'll be right there, as soon as I dry my hair," and went to the bathroom and shut the door behind her.
"Aunt Meredith," the little girl cuddled into her as soon as she got in bed, "why was your hair wet?"
"Kerry woke up," Derek said, "and when Aunt Meredith fed her, she got spit all over her hair...so she got in the shower and washed her hair."
"That's funny," Emma said, "cause Aunt Jenna said Kerry hardly ever spits up," and she cuddled back into Meredith, and went to sleep.
"You are dead," Meredith mouthed, "why can't you just shut up?"
Sunday morning dawned and two little ones joined their aunt and uncle in bed, and it was seven in the morning when Jenna walked through the door that was ajar and smiled, as she saw three little girls sleeping on the middle of the bed in between her brother and sister in law, with Meghan clinging to Meredith, while her newborn daughter was blissfully sleeping in her bassinet.
"Aunt Jenna," Emma said in a whisper, "Kerry is a really good baby...she sleeps through everything." Meredith had opened her eyes immediately when Jenna had walked in the room, and their eyes had met and smiled, "except she spit up all over Aunt Meredith's hair."
"She spit up," Jenna went on full mother alert, "she never spits up..." and looked at Meredith who covered her eyes with her hand and shook her head. "Emma," Jenna sat on the edge of the bed and removed Meredith's hand from her face, and said with amusement, "why do you think she did that?"
"Uncle Derek told me," Emma said, "cause I woke up cause of the noise."
Jenna's eyes were wide open as she said to Meredith, "you didn't..." and Meredith shook her head again.
"Uncle Derek told me Aunt Meredith's hair was wet cause after Kerry ate, she got burped and she spit up on her hair so she had to wash it and she had to dry her hair, so the noise woke me, just like Mommy's hair dryer is really loud."
Jenna smiled at Meredith, "did she spit up a lot?"
"About as much as you are imagining," Meredith said as she rolled her eyes.
"Did she sleep all night?" She looked down at her daughter.
"She woke up around one thirty and I fed her, she took about thirty minutes, and I burped her and changed her...and watched her for about 15 minutes you know make sure she was ok and no spit up or anything...and she was sleeping quietly..."
"And...she slept through the night," Jenna asked.
"I checked on her...almost every hour..."
"You didn't have to do that, Mer...once she has that feeding she's good for at least four hours...longer today..."
"I know...but...you trusted me with her...so I wanted to make sure...every hour...I was up...and checking on her..."
"I would trust you again," Jenna squeezed her hand gently.
"I'm sorry," Meredith mouthed to her.
"Whatever for?"
"You know..."
"Mer..." Jenna hugged her and whispered, "I took on Kathleen's bet...and Rob and I are very good...at being silent...when we have kids in our room..."
"Oh God..." Meredith buried her face in her hands.
"Don't be an idiot," Jenna said.
"Aunt Jenna," Emma who was following the conversation closely told her, "that's not a nice word."
"No sweetie it's not...but we're just kidding..."
"Is Uncle Rob cooking breakfast," Emma asked, "he makes the best pancakes."
"Yes, I'm sure he will, but not for a couple hours, are you hungry?"
"Yes," Emma told her.
"Why don't you go to the kitchen and get some cereal from the counter, I know you like to eat it without milk or there are donuts."
"Ok," the little girl said and got out of bed and went to the kitchen.
"I'm sorry," Meredith said again, "I did not neglect the baby...I swear...we weren't in the shower long..."
"Meredith," Jenna stopped her, "I already knew that would happen, and you don't have to watch over the baby every single second. I expected you would sleep, just as I do...so the fact that you and my brother..." she smiled, "had s-e-x," she said and pointed to her sleeping daughters, "just in case...that was expected by all of us..."
"At least," Meredith said, "did you have a good night sleep?"
"I fell asleep the minute my head hit the pillow and slept till just a few minute ago. Thanks again for offering to watch Kerry last night."
"You're really not mad," Meredith said.
"I'm jealous," Jenna smiled. "She's sound asleep, I'm going to check on Emma, make sure she eats something now, and I'll come get her."
Kerry woke as soon as her mother walked out and Meredith lifted her from the bassinet and kissed her good morning, "hello little one, you must be starving," she spoke softly, and probably wet...so let's get you ready for when Mommy comes back," and she changed her and snuggled her and brought her back to bed with her, and Derek woke to the sight of his wife and goddaughter staring into each other's eyes, and his heart once again knew joy.
"Did she just wake up?"
"Few minutes ago," Meredith smiled at him, he popped a breath mint, "and I just changed her and she's waiting for her mommy to come and feed her.
"She slept through the night?"
"She did," Meredith told him, "I didn't...I was up every hour...make sure she was ok."
"Why didn't you wake me," he said.
"No sense two of us losing sleep..." she smiled, and they both sat against the headboard, and he leaned in to kiss her, and she handed him the baby, and it was at that moment Jenna stood at the door and walked away and got her camera, and captured a beautiful moment between them, as they glanced lovingly at her daughter while her two other little ones slept between them. The photo would grace Meredith and Derek's home as one of their many family favorites.
Meredith smiled as she leaned back into her husband's arms watching her brother in law cook pancakes and genuinely have fun with the giggling little girls sitting in front of him on the three bar stools, while she held Kerry in her arms.
"Ok...I think we're ready," he said and looked over at his wife at the table, and winked, "we have a bunny...for Emma, a bear for Katie..."
"Daddy," Meghan said excitedly, "I be the piglet...cause of Kerry...she can't have one."
"Hard to remember," Derek said to his sister, "the race car driver."
"I know," she smiled, "gave up the fast life...and now makes pancake cutouts for his daughters and niece."
"And," Derek smiled at his sister, "adores my little sister."
"I cannot imagine," Jenna got teary eyed, "my life...without him."
"Like us," Derek nuzzled Meredith's neck, "the love of my life."
"You two have got to be," Jenna sniffled, "the two sappiest Shepherds..."
"We're kind of the only Shepherds," Derek pointed out, "since all of you are technically not...Shepherds anymore."
"Like hell we're not," Jenna told him, and her daughter turned toward her voice.
"Mommy," Meghan said, "that's not a nice word...Aunt Pat would be really mad."
"I'm sorry sweetie," Jenna looked at her brother and Meredith, "please don't tell her."
"Secrets are not good Mommy," Katie told her, "we learned that in school..."
"You're right, Katie I will tell Aunt Pat that I'm sorry."
"Ok, Mommy," Katie said. "Daddy...make Mommy's..." the three girls giggled.
"I don't think Mommy wants a cut out for pancakes..."
"Please Daddy...it's so cute..." Meghan said, and her father obliged.
"Oh Daddy..." Katie said, "it's adorable..."
"God help him," Jenna mumbled, "if he makes an elephant," and Meredith and Derek laughed.
"Mommy...mommy...look..." Meghan called out to her, and Jenna walked up to the counter. "It's a mommy penguin...cause of you...walked like a penguin before my baby sister was born..."
"It's very cute...thanks honey," Jenna kissed her husband, and he whispered, "I'm not stupid, I wouldn't make an elephant," and she laughed delightedly. "You heard?"
"I heard," he kissed her back.
"It's the same everywhere..." Emma said dramatically, "everybody always kissing."
"Uncle D and Aunty M...kissed in bed this morning...cause I see them," Meghan said, "when I opened my eyes...they was kissing and smiling at my baby sister."
"Yes," Jenna said, "they were...and I've got proof..."
"You what?" Derek said.
"Relax... it's an adorable photo...I took when I walked by..." and she showed them, and they agreed that it was.
"Uncle Rob," Emma told him, "you should make two more penguins...one for Mommy and Aunt Meredith."
"Why?" Rob asked instinctively.
"Cause, Aunt Jenna got a penguin cause she had a baby...and I want my mommy to have another baby..."
"Yes Daddy," Katie chimed in, "and for Aunt Merdith cause she needs to have a baby cause she doesn't have one."
"Why..." Rob mumbled, "do I ask these things..."
"Honey," Jenna put hear arm around him, "it's ok...it's not your fault...it's contagious being around Derek."
"You're calling me a brainless...mor..."
"No honey," Jenna teased, "just brainless," and he laughed and kissed her.
"Oh no," they heard from the kitchen doorway, "not here too," Amanda said, "Mommy and Daddy were kissing in the kitchen this morning."
The chaos had only just begun, and Meredith smiled, this had become her family, and she couldn't wait till the day their own kids made the same comments, in their kitchen overlooking the beautiful view from their cliff.
They were all enjoying dessert after lunch; the kids spread out throughout the house, the older ones in charge of the little ones, allowing grown up time and conversation.
"Shep," Kevin commented, "I understand...you may like being a hairdresser," and Derek choked on the coffee he was drinking, as the rest of their family laughed.
"Meredith," Maggie joked, "promise me...before you have kids...you'll agree to take the younger girls...all five of them for a week...see if it clicks for him...that they tell everything."
"Not only that," Nancy teased, "they tell each other everything...and according to Rebecca...if you and Meredith ever stay over...it must be because we have a new baby...and let me tell you...if that happens...you are getting the older ones for the summer...while I only take care of the little one."
"Nancy," Mike said, "are you seriously considering we should have another kid?"
"Relax," she joked, "I'm just making sure I'm not like Maggie...remember the last time we said no more kids...I got two in a row, so I'm not tempting fate like she is..."
"I'm not tempting fate," Maggie said, "are we honey..." she turned to John.
"Not at all," John caressed her shoulder, "and we don't even have to be silent about it," he joked as her siblings and in laws exchanged smiles with each other.
"Ok," Mike said, "time to settle the bets..."
"Big mouth," Kathleen joked with her brother in law, "I was going to do it..."
"Time's running out," Mike told her, "they have to leave for the airport by 4:30, latest."
"We don't know what you're talking about," Meredith said, and felt Derek's breath on her neck and smiled.
"We can always call Emma in here," Kevin joked, "and have her tell us why she thinks Uncle Derek may like to be a hairdresser."
"Ass," Meredith mouthed to him, but ruined the effect by smiling.
"What was the bet...exactly?" Derek asked.
"If Meredith could make the lion roar," Kathleen said, "in silence..."
"Who won?" Meredith asked.
"We don't know," Jenna laughed, "Ma...you have the..."
"Mom bet on this...again..." Derek asked incredulously.
"Let's see," Carolyn walked in with a handful of papers, and began to open them one by one and separate into two piles, yes and no; "well," Carolyn smiled, "it looks like nobody's a winner."
"Mom," Kathleen said, "that's impossible...we all bet...that..."
"Yes," Carolyn said, "you all bet...yes...all 9 of us...bet the same way...so technically nobody wins..."
"Or," Mike said, "we pull the money together and split it nine ways..."
"I have a better idea," Maggie said, "do like Mark did...everybody pays up their gambling debt...and we start the East coast allowance reserve."
"That's well over seven hundred dollars," Carolyn added quickly.
"That's ok," Mike said, "there's six more grandkids...it should be for them."
"I agree," Maggie smiled.
"Of course you do," Nancy teased her, "you have two of them..."
"Not yet," Maggie smiled, "but who knows," she agreed, once again surprising her family.
"I think it's a great idea," Meredith smiled. "Derek, we'll have some of the kids allowances covered."
"I guess," Carolyn said, "that should teach you all not to bet."
"Are you kidding," Mike joked, "Ma...half the fun was putting them on the spot."
"Dear," Carolyn joked back, "I don't think your bets had anything to do with the outcome. They'd decided long before how they'd spend the evening."
"On that note," Derek said, "Mer...I'm going to get our things together. We need to leave here in two hours exactly, and it will take that long to talk to the kids a few minutes."
"I can do it," she started to get up.
"It won't take me long," he said, and kissed the top of her head.
"Mer," Jenna said, "the baby will want to eat around three...I thought you might want to feed her and spend the time with her."
"Yes," Meredith told her, as three of the women exchanged smiles, "I'd like that a lot."
The hour flew by quickly as they spent time with the kids and then she followed Jenna to the nursery and changed the baby into one of the outfits of organic cotton she'd bought and had already been washed, then Jenna left her in the nursery, and walked to her room when suddenly she heard Meredith's voice and knew she was unaware there was a baby monitor in the room, and she sat on the bed unable to move.
"Kerry Beatrice," Meredith said, "you know, I never would have thought of that name, but I am so glad I had a chance to pick it, because...oh...here's your Uncle Derek...it made us happy to pick it because when we heard it, we knew it was true...and it fit you perfectly...you do bring joy to everyone but for us especially...because we were very sad...baby, we were going to have a baby, she would have been your cousin...and just a few weeks younger, but...she wasn't able to stay with us...and that made us very sad...but we know she's a little angel, because...there was a little girl...that was very sick...the very same day we lost her...and she told us of the little angel that visited her...and she told us her name was Brianna...just like your little cousin...and you see...even though we don't have her...we were able to have you...and be your godparents...and we love you so much...and one day...we hope you have other little cousins to play with...and you can come visit us...and be the older cousin, but not be too bossy..."
"Meredith," Jenna heard Derek say softly, the tenderness in his voice unmistakable, "don't cry...please...not any more," he said, and Jenna could only let her own silent tears continue to fall.
Meredith continued to talk, and as she did, Jenna brought a hand to her mouth and began to cry, and that was how her mother found her.
"Jenna," Carolyn said, as she closed the door behind her, "sweetheart, what's wrong..."
"Mom," Jenna said in between crying breaths, "she...Mom...she..."
"What are you talking about, Jenna, you're worrying me..."
"Listen..." she said, "Meredith ...Mom...she lost a baby..."
"Derek," Meredith said, her voice laced with tears, "they're happy tears...I swear they are...I'm not sad anymore...and she's helped...she has...so much Derek...to have been here this weekend and hold this precious little one...it helps Derek...it does..."
"I love you," he said, and there was a moment of silence, as he kissed her lips softly.
"I love you too," she said, "you have no idea how much...don't ever let me forget it."
"You won't," he said, and leaned in to kiss her again.
Carolyn took a deep breath and listened, "well, you already heard part of the story...and one day...when you're old enough to understand...maybe I can tell you that I knew from the moment I held you that you would always have your very own angel watching over you...she's your little cousin...her name was Brianna...and I have to tell your Mommy...one day...but not now...because it was all about you...and waiting to welcome you...without anything but happiness...no sadness at all...only the joy of you coming into her life and ours..."
"Mom," Jenna turned to her, a bit accusingly, "you knew...you knew...and didn't stop me...all the times...Mom...it had to be heartbreaking for her...how I went on and on...oh my God...the baby shower...that's why you kept insisting...I have to talk to them, before they leave," she started to get up, and Carolyn stopped her.
"No," Carolyn said, "you have to let her tell you...when she's ready...she did not want you to know...she made us promise her you would not know...she wanted nothing to bring sadness as you waited for the baby's birth...that was her wish...and she was adamant...so now, you will let her enjoy those moments with her godchild, and know that you have given her a gift...a gift that helped her begin to heal her sadness from the moment you took her hand and she felt the baby move, and you trusted her to be the godmother...you will let her tell you when she is ready...not before..."
"Mom...she's...how can she be this strong...I don't think I could do it..."
"She had your brother," Carolyn said simply. "They had each other."
Meredith finished feeding the baby and gave her to Derek to burp, and then they both sat at the window seat, Derek with his back against the cushions as he put his arms round Meredith and the baby, and they marveled at the tiny miracle in her arms, and the healing power of their goddaughter's presence in their lives.
"We have to go," Derek whispered.
"I know," said, and held the baby closer, "hey little one...we love you very much...and we'll see you in just a few weeks...for your baptism."
"Meredith," Carolyn walked in with Jenna, "Derek...it's getting late."
"We're ready," he said, and helped Meredith to her feet, "though we hate to leave."
"You'll be back soon," Carolyn said, and met Jenna's gaze in warning.
"We're going to miss you," Meredith said, "Kerry Beatrice...be a good girl for your Mommy...and know that we love you very much...and I'll still talk to you every night...if you keep your Mommy up..."
Jenna had tears in her eyes and nodded.
"Jenni," Derek said, as he lifted her chin, "don't you dare cry...you'll have Meredith crying...and snoring on the way back...and they already threatened to ban us last time..." he attempted to joke, to no avail, as both his wife and sister openly cried as they said goodbye.
"Mom," Meredith said once they were alone, "thank you," she hugged her. "I couldn't have done this without you, knowing you were there every moment."
"I love you sweetheart, and I'm so proud of you," she too became sentimental, as she kissed them both goodbye. "Travel safely and God bless you both, call me the minute you are home, even if it's one in the morning."
They spent a few more minutes with the rest of the family and she turned to Jenna one more time, and kissed the baby, "you have no idea...how much it means to me...that you trusted me with this precious baby...last night...and to be her godmother...I won't ever let you down."
"I know," Jenna held back her tears, "there's no one else I'd want...she has the most amazing and beautiful godmother...inside and out...just like you told Meggie."
"Ok," Derek said, "you two...we're going to be back in three weeks," and reached for Meredith's hand and pulled her along to the car and they waved before driving away.
The flight was over seven hours, much longer traveling west, and it was close to midnight by the time they got home, showered and got in bed.
"Derek," Meredith said, as she lay in his arms, her head resting on his chest, "are you asleep already?"
"No," he kissed her temple, and shifted their bodies, so they faced each other, "what's on your mind," he asked, their hands reaching for the other's as they entwined, "you've been quiet since we left."
"I slept the whole way," she smiled, "couldn't very well talk..."
"Mer..."
"I'm ok," she leaned in to him, and brushed his lips. "Thank you for believing me that I could handle it; seeing the baby...being with her..."
"You were wonderful...and I know you were happy...in spite of...the sadness..."
"I am happy," Meredith told him, "she was our answered prayer...a precious tiny miracle...that gives me hope...and faith that one day we will have our own..."
"We will..." he kissed her tenderly, "your dream will come true," he caressed her face gently, "Meredith...we will see our dreams fulfilled."
"Derek," she said, "not right now...but soon," she bridged the distance between them, their faces barely inches apart and she smiled, "maybe in just a few months. I want to try. I want a baby."
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(Shattered...) Dreams Fulfilled
FanfictionThis begins after 4x11 and is about MerDer. This is copied from Tapatalk. On Greysmcboard by Merder4lifetime. ***MATURE***