Forever and Always

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Oh di ba title palang boring na? More on love kasi diba kesa horror? Anyway start ko na story ko, a round of applause sa mga magbabasa

My name is Anna i was born and raised in ph pero when i was 15 my parents separated then my mom got married in new york so kinuha niya ako dun nung 20 years old ago, fresh grad ako noon sa ue,

I met drake in target, parang 3 months palang ata ako sa ny when i met him siya yung lalake na wala lahat ng gusto ko physically, i like masculine na yung mga pacool na muhkang fuckboy na lalake, but he was skinny, tall , weird he said hi and asked me about my tattoo because he was planning to get one too, i told him i was planning to get another one too, at tong tats ko na tinutukoy nya is nung 18 pa ako, i told him there is a tattooshop i know downtown na dun ko balak magpa gawa then he said "cool, wanna check it out later?" Sabi ko naman 'sure i dont have any plans after' so nung nandun na kami nagpaconcept kami ng design nagustuhan niya nagpasched kami sabay kami magpapalagay then after that he asked me to watch a movie, then ang saya niya pala kausap, gwapo naman then dami namin napagusapan, nagtataka si mama first time na super late ako umuwi, to cut it short naging kami, as in wala ako pinagsisishan, lahat ng mga bagay na pinangarap ko na ugali ng lalake asakanya, it was funny kasi he confessed na wala siya plan magpatats talaga, pero para lang may maitopic siya at mayaya niya raw ako lumabas, pero everything changed when i went back to ph.

Tandang tanda ko, his last message was :
Drake: "I love you forever and always, no matter what happens"
Me: (may narinig ako na inaannounce na magboboard na ang isang plane) where are you?? Are you... omg!!
D: yes i cant wait to see you babe!<

After 1 day wala response, 2 days till 1 week wala, i was paranoid wala naman balita na may plane na nagcrash i prayed and prayed na magparamdam siya, na okay lang siya, everything was set sa pagdadating niya,

Till one night, i dont know the place, i saw him in a car nakasmile bumaba niyakap ako, he said "sorry i was so damn late babe" sabi ko what took you so long?
Some thing came up i had to stop
Its okay im glad youre here sabi ko.

Naglakad lakad kami parang sea shore, nagpropose siya, i said yes ofcourse! Sabi niya lagi ko tandaaan na mahal niya ako, kahit wala na siya, na alagaan ko daw sarili ko, i said;what are you talking about
He kissed me and said, 'but i have to go soon, so please always take good care of yourself and ill love you no matter what" then disappeared.
Then i woke up. Crying, panaginip pala yun.

Then everynight or naps, he was always there, magkasama kami, paulit ulit niya sinasabing mahal niya ako, minsan dinadasal ko na sana di ako magising para kasama ko siya, until one day i went out of town, sa tagaytay, kung saan dun kamn magpupunta sana, paalis ako bigla tumawag pinsan ko, na may; nagsurrender ng mga nawawalang gamit, at meron daw foreigner na may ari kapangalan ni drake, agad ko pinuntahan, kay drake nga, andun yung id niya , passport 'drake willams' a hindi ko alam kung asan siya, hindi ako tumuloy ng tagaytay at inuwi gamit niya, pagopen ko ng bag may mga gamit nakasulat name ko, isang maliit na unicorn kasi alam noya mahilig ako don, niyakapyakap yakap at nakatulog, pero this time iba na panaginip ko, asa car ulit sya, pero may takip bibig at nakablindfold, wala ako madinig hindi detalyado, basta kinuha pera niya tapos pinagsasaksak siya at hindi ko mafigure kung tinapon siya sa dagat, iyak ako ng iyak pagising ko nababaliw na ako sigaw ako ng sigaw kung asan siya, kinuwento ko kaso sabi baka nababaliw na ako, dinala ako sa psychiatrist nagprescribe ng sleeping pills at anti depressant pero sa mga sumunod ng panaginip ko nagbalik sa dati, magkasama, hanggang twing didilat ako nadidinig ko na sinasabi niya 'good morning beautiful' sabay haplos ng buhok ko,

After 2 months i got a call from his mom, btw ayaw saakin ng nanay niya, asa ny palang ako non pinaghihiwalay na kami, gusto nya american lapa, pero dahil mahal namin isat isa, you cant just seperate 2 people inlove, natakot ako kasi di ko alam isasagot ko,
But i still answered.
Momniya: hey anne hows drake? Seems like you guys are having fun. I called because i was having nightmares of him
Me: what kind of nightmares? (Guat ako)
Momniya: he was killed by 3 men, then sometimes he tells me i shouldnt worry about him
Me: hever got here elizabeth. (Namenya)
Naiyak na ako. Sabi ko i had the same dreams, nagalit siya, sinisi saakin lahat, kasalanan ko daw, pagbabayaran ko ang lahat lahat.

Then back to my dreams, nagsosorry si drake kasi sabi niya "i love you but you have to let me go" sabi ko sakanya "drake do you think im selfish?"
He said..

Drake: its not your fault, im running out of time anne
Me: what for? I need you here please dont go
Drake: anne please, its my last request (dito nagiiyakan kami)
Me: you know i love you, i love you this much im letting you go, not because it hurts, but because i love you.

He kissed me, then nawala, nasa 5 months rin na panay siya panaginip ko, simula nun wala na, hanggang ngayon di ako sigurado kung ano nangyare sakanya, i owe a lot sa family niya, ako sinisisi nila, hindi nila alam ako rin nasasaktan, sometimes i feel his presence then pag nafefeel ko nagsasalita ako magisa kunyare ngkwekwento sakanya, everytime i miss him i just travel, sa mga lugar na malapit sa dagat, panay dagat panaginip ko kaya naisip ko malapit siya don.and i know that kasi we planned before to get married on the beach.

4 years ago na ito, and my heart still aches and my arms still long for his embrace, ika nga nakatagpo ako ng taanong para saakin pero nawala pa saakin, hindi natin hawak ang mundo, im 26 years old na, 2 years kami nagsama sa states ni drake pero nung bumalik ako parang naiwan lahat ng pagkatao ko, hanggang ngayon iniiyakiyakan ko, wala ako naging boyfriend simula nun, sabi nga nila wag naman daw ako matakot magmahal muli, pero saka na siguro, pag hindi na ako nasasaktan.

Salamat sa pagbabasa.

SupposedtobeMrsWillams
Batanes

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