Persona x Reader

Akira Kurusu x Depressed!Reader (P5)

"I'm sorry, can we take a rain check?"

"I'm not really feeling well, another time?"

"I'm sorry..."

Such excuses were commonplace for you now. Your boyfriend would always text and call, although the latter you didn't have the courage to answer. That fuelled further white lies - you were in the shower, you were away from your phone, etcetera. 

It was nothing he had done, and nothing had particularly happened either. And yet this heaviness was ever present no matter what you did, weighing you down constantly. 

So you didn't want to worry him- it was better to just wait for this to pass, and then you'll be back to normal. He wouldn't even know. 

You did feel guilty, as his messages got more frequent. But it couldn't last much longer, could it? 

Your stomach grumbled, breaking you out of your thoughts. But despite your hunger, you couldn't get yourself to move. So it was another afternoon of laying motionlessly, staring at the ceiling. 

                                                                                         ***

A noise stirred you, and you opened your eyes. It was evening now, you hadn't even realised you fell asleep. It was continuous, and you realise it was knocking at the door. 

With no recollections of ordering anything, you shakily made your way to the door. Your pace was sluggish, and the sound of static was in your ears. 

You opened the door, and stiffened. "Oh, Akira...! Sorry, I dozed off..."

Akira's expression was unreadable as he looked over you. "You feeling okay?"

"I... Sort of. Still probably need more time to rest up." You half-lied, grip tightening on the door handle.

"It's been nearly a month now..." Akira said, but didn't follow it up.  

"Yeah... I'm not really sure what it is, ahah...ha..."

Trailing off, you were both left with silence. You were quickly running out of believable lies, even to tell yourself. 

Akira hesitated, but finally began to speak. "You know if there's anything wrong, I'm here for you."

"I know that." You replied, truthfully. You knew he'd be there no matter what.  "I know that..." 

"So what's wrong? Tell me." Akira said, putting a hand on your shoulder. His dark eyes seemed to plead you. 

The static got louder, and your vision was slowly ebbed away by spots of black. Your body wavered. "It's just, a head cold..."

"I know it's more than that." Akira answered, and peered at you. 'What is it? What's wrong?"

"Just a bit... dizzy..." 

Your name was called out, and then there was darkness. 

                                                                                         ***

When they opened next, you were greeted by a welcoming glow- the lamp was on. A cool cloth was on your forehead, and you caught it as you sat up. 

You grimaced as you remembered. That fainting wasn't going to convince him any... Where even was Akira? 

The room was empty. You sighed. Maybe he gave up on you, with how many half-hearted excuses you gave him. 

Before you could go and berate yourself anymore, the door creaked open. 

"You're up. Feeling better?" Akira asked, holding a bowl. It smelled nice. 

"A bit... You stayed?" 

Akira looked puzzled. "Of course, why wouldn't I?" 

He placed the bowl in your lap, careful as ever. It was warm and comforting, and as you gazed back at him, his smile was too. 

"Eat up. You haven't had anything, have you?" 

Just like Akira, he always knew. Even if you tried to keep things under wraps, he had a sense unlike no other. 

Feeling touched, you blinked back your tears and nodded. "Thank you." 

Akira didn't question you as you ate, instead letting you enjoy what was your most proper meal in a while. You finished quicker than usual, your stomach and heart full. 

He took the bowl, putting it on the bedside table. "So... Will you tell me now?"

You fell silent, winding the covers around your fingers. Akira put his hand over yours. 

"I'm sorry." You said finally, voice breaking. "I'm sorry for making excuses, and lying. I was just waiting for this feeling to stop, and... and it feels like it won't." 

"What's wrong?" Akira asked, and it brought forth tears.

"I don't know...!" You wiped your eyes in frustration. "But it makes everything so hard- I feel useless, and-"

Akira hushed you gently as you cried, stroking your head and pulling you into a hug. His arms were secure, holding you close. The bottled feelings you had been ignoring, covering up- all came spilling out. 

"Why do I feel like this?" You managed to get out, and Akira only held you tighter. 

You weren't sure how much time had passed, of you crying till there were no more tears, or how long Akira had been holding you. It had gotten way into the night. 

Eventually you pulled back, sniffing. "I'm sorry. Morgana will be wondering where you are-"

"It's okay, I told him I was going to see you." Akira smiled at you. His hand fell from your head to your cheek, and he caressed it gently.

"But it's dark..."

"Can't I stay?" Akira asked, tilting his head. Those puppy eyes...

"If you want to..." You replied. "But still, I'm sorry about all this... I didn't want to worry you, and yet I ended up doing it anyway. I'm probably the worst partner there is."

"Don't say that." Akira frowned, pressing his finger gently into your cheek. "You're the best I could ever have. I love you. I'll always love you."

Despite the heaviness that burdened you, the darkness that seemed to close in on you- Akira's words lifted it, bit by bit. 

You gave in. "I love you too. And I'm sorry."

"You don't need to keep apologising." Akira chided, poking your cheek. "Do you want anything else to eat?"

"I'm okay... I'm actually feeling tired again." You admitted. The crying took a lot out of you.

"Then let me know what you want for breakfast in the morning, I'll make it for you." Akira kissed your head, and you smiled. 

And another night passed- this time not spent tossing and turning, or aimlessly staring at the ceiling- but in the arms of your loved one.                                               

                                               _________________________________________

A/N: Another request!