Sunflower. [F. W]

43. Chocolate

Remus Lupin had never felt this hurt before. Not even when he first turned into a werewolf and ate as much chocolate as he could in hopes of killing that side of him. Not when he learnt his best friends had been killed. No. Nothing compared to the pain he felt losing the love of his life. 

True he felt heartbroken when he had met the reality when Sirius and Ane got together. Still, he got something out of it, the most loving goddaughter he could ask for. And he still got to keep him around, even if they were friends. Remus looked tough on the outside, but inside he would often daydream about how his hand would feel on his. About the stolen glances during lunch and dinner, as Sirius never got up early enough to make it to breakfast so Remus would always keep some chocolate on him, mostly out of habit but to give it to Sirius if he got cranky due to being hungry. He would daydream about braiding Sirius' hair when he got upset. Taking care of him brought him such joy, it was his little way to be close to him, not the way he wanted but the closest he got. 

Taking care of Bee when Sirius went to Azkaban felt weirdly like a blessing. Remus would give his life for her. It wasn't the fact that she was a lovely kid, or the fact that taking care of her would be the closest thing to having an adult life with Sirius. But Bee Black had brought such joy in his life. For the first time in many many years, Moony felt like Moony, not like some monster, not like someone he should ashamed of. She looked at him with such love and adoration, she was so not afraid to show affection towards the man that they had been each other's safe place for years. 

So now, sorting through Sirius stuff was less painful. Bee, being heir to everything the Blacks owned had decided that she'd keep Grimmauld Place and Remus could stay there as long as he needed to grief. Sirius stuff wouldn't be moved anywhere, but they wanted to find some stuff to keep for themselves. A few laughs escaping their lips, remembering the extravagant man Sirius had been. 

"I can't believe he owned a cardigan, holy shit uncle Moony" she laughed pulling a brown cardigan. "You should keep it, it suits you."

"But you are going to keep the leather jacket. When you were little we would put it on you, well James would and we'd love to see just how far you'd be able to crawl."

"Meanies! But I will take you up on that offer. I am also taking one of his shirts." 

"Can I keep his watch?" said Remus looking at the little watch he was holding. 

"It is all yours. That way you'll have a little piece of him everywhere." Bee smiled sadly. "Uncle Moony were you two... You know... Together again before he passed?"

"Yeah" said Remus tearing up, "but it's okay, we'll reunite at some point. Meanwhile I got you, and I'm happy about it." 

"You know Uncle Remus, out of all the people who could have raised me, I'm glad you were the one to do it. You will forever be my second dad, dating Dadfoot or not."

"Dadfoot?" Remus said surprised. 

"It is a silly name Freddie started calling him and it was so bad it actually got stuck!" she laughed. 

"Can you believe Gideon called him the same before he died? My god the Weasleys are connected or something" he laughed along. 

"Hey, what's that under the bed?"

It was Sirius' old record collection. Bee picked the box up, and the record player next to it, setting the both on the bed. She looked for a very specific song, the song Sirius would sing to her before falling asleep, the soundtrack to so many adventures and mischief from The Marauders. All the young dudes by Mott The Hoople started filling the air as the both of them closed their eyes. Bee extended her hand to Sirius, pulling him up.