Traitor (Renji Yomo x Reader) [Continued in a second book!]

Sleep Is For The Weak

"Hey.. uh.. Hey..! You need to .. u-uh.. wake up" Renji spoke as he gently shook me.

The movement of my own body made me wake up right away.

Right after I opened my eyes I realized that I was leaning against him.

My head was leaning against Renji's chest.

I could hear his heartbeat, it was so.. Calm and steady.

At first I didn't think anything about this - mainly cause I was still tired and just woke up - but as soon as I started gaining more and more consciousness, I realized how awkward this was.

"Oh.. uh.. Oh. Sorry" I mumbled as I slowly sat up straight - my back hurt like hell so I groaned right away.

Just then I realized that one of Renji's arms was wrapped around me too.

Oh no.. he probably .. didn't want to hurt me and therefore let me sleep..

Or maybe he was just trying to be kind.. Gosh I don't know.

But did I really sleep .. in that position?! My head.. Against his chest.

He just stared at me with his usual expressionless expression, expressing absolutely nothing.

There was no way I could tell if he was bothered by our near or.. Didn't mind it.

I rubbed my eyes because they were hurting.

"Sorry, I must've fallen asleep last night" I added.

He stayed silent but slightly shrugged while he was looking at me.

It was hard to recall what happened last night.

So many nightmares, so much pain.

All my memories were blurry.

"We have to go to the doctor soon. He has to check on you. Your heart is acting dangerously weird. After all, I could somewhat monitor it over the past 4 hours, it doesn't even beat regularly" he explained.

I sighed because I knew he was right.

"Yeah.. it.. Really hurts too." I explained.

"Thought so. I'll go make breakfast. Take a shower if you wish, last night was really.. Tough on you" he murmured as he got up, stretching himself - and I swore I could hear his back crack loudly.

God this must've been so uncomfy for him.

"Thank you for letting me sleep.. I uh..-"

"It's fine. Don't thank me. You needed the sleep." he interrupted me to say as he exited his bedroom.

I sighed.

Sometimes we were really close or I at least felt a connection but most of the time he was being really distant and things were awkward between us.

It confused me.

While I knew he thought of me as part of his duty, it just somehow really disappointed me.