Traitor (Renji Yomo x Reader) [Continued in a second book!]

Rift

As much as I needed a good nights rest, I couldn't fall asleep. I, at most, drifted off for a few minutes before waking up from another nightmare. It was more stress to fall actually sleep than to just stay awake. If I would've had a choice, I would've stayed awake.. But my eyes were closing on their own. As stressed as I was, as fast as my heart was beating, my eyelids were still closing. Hearing Renji sleep behind me was both reassuring and saddening. It was good to know that Renji was with me - that way I knew he wouldn't be with Itori. But at the same time, it hurt to know that he could lie to my so easily. It made me question everything. And on top of that, his son was undeniably cute. So cute, it made me feel sick. Sick because I knew our little boy was a pure beauty, too. Sick because they could've been friends. And lastly, sick because I knew I'd never see my baby grow up.

In an attempt to find comfort, I hugged the huge molly bear to me. While it didn't smell like our son, it at least gave me something to hold on to. If I wouldn't have been disappointed in Renji, perhaps I would've cuddled up to him instead - but.. No. Not right now. I refused to let him spoon me as well. He didn't deserve any cuddles and I certainly didn't need to torture myself further. I already felt like I was being incredibly generous for letting him sleep beside me instead of on the couch. However, all I wanted was a peaceful.. Somewhat peaceful at least.. Rest.

If Tetsuo would've been here, I would've probably gone insane. Renji's snoring was already extra annoying that night.. But some baby occasionally screaming on top of that? Hell. No.

Time passed by faster than I thought it would and eventually, Renji's alarm clock went off. That meant it was past 8am. That meant he had to work.

Groaning, he smacked the top of it, stopped the ringing for the first time. Then the second.. The third.. Fourth.. Fifth.. And then he finally started rolling off the bed. Meanwhile, I pretended to be sleeping and plotted our future conversation in my head. There was no way to avoid some ugly confrontation. I needed to know all details and he had to be honest with me. Otherwise, this wouldn't work out.

Renji knows that this is his last chance. He knows that if he messes up, I'm gone. Maybe I need to remind him of that. Maybe then he'll tell me everything I deserve to know.

While I certainly didn't need to know 'how babies are made', I wanted to know such things as.. if he could imagine a future with Itori - because if he could.. Then I'd leave. The chance would be too high he'd just cheat. I could save myself the extra heartache by just leaving.

Renji roamed around the room, took out some fresh clothes and then proceeded to grab towels. He went to take a shower. While that should've made me feel better, I really just felt lonely. It seemed that from now on, I'd have to worry about sharing him. Sure, I didn't own him and I was somewhat okay with him spending time with his son.. But Itori?! No, I certainly wasn't up for polygamy.

She's a lying snake with quite some.. Assets.. And Renji's probably easy to manipulate if she just shoves them in his face.. I can totally see him thinking with his dick. He's not getting any sex from me.. Maybe they really have each other for that..

Getting the idea of him sleeping with her behind my back out of my head was impossible. It'd explain while, in all those months, he never asked me just once nor made any kind of moves in an attempt to get in my pants. Not that I would've let him.. But now his behavior made me feel neglected, perhaps even replaced.