Traitor (Renji Yomo x Reader) [Continued in a second book!]

What's Done Is Done

With a loud and deep inhale, I woke up. My eyes shot open only to meet the same white pillow I fell asleep on, lit up softly by the moonlight. Every inch of my body began aching as my senses slowly returned to me. The smell of booze and sweat with a touch of smoke surrounded my body, bringing back the painful memories of Renji choking me to the point of passing out after severely harassing me. Slowly lifting myself up on my knees, so I could get up, I groaned and immediately bit my lip to keep quiet as pain ran through my body.

Shit.. What did he do..

It was too dark to see actual colors but both of my wrists were bruised, the shade a lot darker than my skin. At least the belt around them was gone. My knees simply hurt. But it was not just that; just tilting my head the slightest bit hurt and.. my entire body from down the waist ached with every move. While I tried to overcome the pain, a loud snore reminded me of Renji's presence. Glancing over at him, I saw how he was laying on his stomach. One hand clutching onto a bottle of wine while his other hand was hidden beneath his pillow. Drool was running down his cheek. He seemed so peaceful, so calm.. So like his usual self. Except for the wine, of course.

As I slowly crawled out of the bed, massive pain ran down my entire body to the point I clenched my jaw tightly to keep myself from crying. My legs almost gave out the moment I stood on them. They were trembling. In fact, my entire body began trembling. Even up until now, I didn't really realize what happened to me. It was until I saw the small pool of blood on the bed that I started feeling sick to the bone. Instinctively looking down at my legs, I saw how severely bruised they were and how a bit of blood was both on my dress and my legs. There was no doubt it was my blood.

No.. Don't tell me he actually.. Went through with it..

I started breathing faster, feeling a breakdown coming up as my stomach turned. Tears shot into my eyes. I was in absolute disbelief and pain, my eyes fixated on my body. The negligee was completely ruined from both blood and him tearing at it, the socks were stained with blood and my little jacket was thrown off to the ground .. Along with my underwear. I was barely covered. With every passing moment more pain erupted from a new area. I started nervously scratching my arm with more force than ever. It reddened right away and started burning only seconds later. Looking back at Renji, who seemed to have violated me, I noticed how his pants were not sitting in place. Half of his butt was exposed for me to see. Usually, I wouldn't have cared.. But in this case, it confirmed my worst fears. Feeling used and abused terribly, I ran to the bathroom. I couldn't be in the same room as him. But I only got so far. My legs gave out only moments after I exited the room and I landed on my knees harshly. Tears fell from my eyes as his act sunk in. I felt it with every fiber of my body. In me. On me.

Disgusting.

I was disgusted of myself, wanted to tear my skin away, start over with a new body. It was then that all my self-hatred, all the issues I kept battling with all my power, returned. The lack of medication was not helping this situation at all. I felt so empty, like a big part of me had just been taken. My depression was kicking in.

How could he...

It took a few minutes before I could regain my composure enough to get up and limp into the bathroom. Moving just the smallest inch hurt tremendously. The bathroom was where he left his pants. And hopefully the key for this place along with it. There was simply no way I could stay here. Not after what he just did. I could endure hits or punches.. But the moment he decided to scoop as low as all the other ghouls did, he sealed our future. My hopes for a happy family were gone. And the more I thought about it, I believed my baby died as well. I felt different. I felt worse. I didn't feel pregnant anymore. But perhaps it was just overshadowed by all the pain.