In The Blink Of An Eye

Horrible Plan

You see, I've been planning all this out for days now. I knew what I had to do and how I wanted to do it, I was just looking for the right chance. The gun I have which was supposed to be tucked inside its case and not to be looked at, well...I had it and it was under the seat of my car. I couldn't let Jake see it so I had to hide it and make him think that it was still at home. Remember that mask that Silas and Viktor had given me? Well, I also had it with me. I took it from his house last time we went to visit. Lilli had Silas entertained and Viktor was too busy with my sister to even notice that I was there. I got the mask without anybody noticing that it was even gone. Now you might be getting an idea of what I was about to do and just how dangerous it was not to mention that it was a completely stupid idea. 

I should have probably waited for it to be very late before I even attempted something like this, but I didn't even care. Either way, this was not going to work and I was about to get myself into a shit load of more trouble than I was already in. 

I pulled up to the hotel which was five minutes away from my dad's house where I should mention Jake, my brother, Silas and Lilli were. As I sat there in the parking lot, I felt my breath getting heavier and my hands began to shake. I looked down at the dashboard and saw that it was a little past ten at night. It was way too early and the hotel was probably filled with people at this time. But, if I didn't go now… I'd never have the chance to do it again. 

I reach down and grab the mask and the gun. As I hold the gun inside my hand which I can barely hold due to how bad my hands were shaking, I realize that this might be the last time anybody has seen me alive or free. 

What the hell was I doing??? 

Why was I doing this??? 

I re-parked my car in the back corner where it's the darkest and empty. I had to make sure that nobody saw me coming in and out. As you can imagine, I was a nerve wreck. I wasn't born for things like this. I had no idea how to do any of this, it felt like a thing that was so out of my territory. I was sure that the minute I stepped in there, the cops would be after me. As I sat there in my car, I thought about just how crazy and dangerous all this was. I still had time to change my mind and looking back now, I should have. 

But...I didn't!!!

I got out of my car, put the gun and the mask in my purse and walked in to the front desk like every other normal person. I don't know why I was expecting there to be so many more people going in and out. It was now past eleven. I had been sitting in that parking lot for an hour thinking. You would think that in that meantime I would have came up with a safer and smarter plan. 

As I look around, I see one person working at the front desk. Most people were not inside of their rooms doing whatever it is that they had to do. People didn't check in at eleven nor did they check out. Even when it happens, it's usually earlier or later. It was perfect for me, because I needed for it to be as empty as possible. Well...it was empty. 

I go to the restroom, get my gun and put on my mask. Just as I am about to head out of the restroom, I get a good glimpse of myself in the mirror. 

What the hell was I doing? What the hell was I thinking? 

I have a daughter, a boyfriend, family and friends. I couldn't afford to make this kind of mistake. I couldn't afford to get caught and put behind bars for this. As I look at myself, I realize that I can't do this. Not this way! I can't get myself into this kind of trouble when my life was already a living hell as it is. I take the mask off and put it back into my purse with the gun. 

I walked out of the restroom and to the front desk. Just as I was about to get out of the door, I heard a man's voice coming behind me. 

"Ma'am, is there anything I can help you with?"