Why am I never enough??

part 164

while i was up pissed off i grabbed my keys and walked out the house and got in my car driving to waffle house and when i finished ordering i just sat there waiting while on my phone calming myself down then someone sat down in front of me so i put my phone down and looked in front of me seeing dejuane and i gave him a little smile

Y: seems like you're stalking me sir
Dejuane: no you just never turn off your location
Y: oh ha
Dejuane: why are you here by yourself
Y: me and kobe are still arguing but tonight was a little worse
Dejuane: what are y'all arguing about
Y: you
Dejuane: what i do
Y: nothing but since i went to you for advice on kobe and to get ready at your house he's mad and not only that but he's mad that i gave you a hug
Dejuane: then stop giving me hugs you're so obsessed
Y: omg i hate you
Dejuane: i get that a lot
Y: stop i'm trying to be mad
Dejuane: that's why you gone be a wrinkly bitch
Y: i really don't like you
Dejuane: i made you smile though
Y: it doesn't count
Dejuane: it does though
Y: no it doesn't stop lying anyways shouldn't you be with the kids
Dejuane: the group came over to watch them while i checked on you
Y: omg you're so obsessed
Dejuane: haha fuck off
Y: haha but no for real thanks for making me smile
Dejuane: anytime y/n but what you get to eat
Y: food for myself
Dejuane: none for me wow i'm hurt
Y: you just got here a few minutes ago and i was supposed to be here by myself dummy
Dejuane: um chile anyways i need my hoodie back that i gave you a while back
Y: why
Dejuane: i want it
Y: um actually sure but i'll have to find it
Dejuane: ok then

i kept talking to dejuane until my food came and i shared with him then it was around 3:00am so gave him and hug which lasted for around a minute then we pulled apart and i waved bye and walked to my car while he got in his and i drove off going to the house but once i got there and walked in kobe was in the kitchen and he turned looking at me

Kobe: where you go
Y: why
Kobe: well i went to your room so i could apologize but you weren't there so i decided i'll wait for you right, well i was in there since 11:00pm and you are just now getting home so you must've had fun with whoever you were with
Y: here we go again
Kobe: yea here we do go again because you are constantly talking about what i'm doing wrong but for some reason you don't see that what you are doing is worse
Y: i find it funny that somehow i didn't tell you where i was or what i was doing but you automatically know
Kobe: i'm not fucking dumb i know you were with dejuane it doesn't take a fucking rocket scientist to see that
Y: ok but why are you cussing so much
Kobe: because this shit is fucking ridiculous if i fucking wanted to be treated as a damn second choice or feel like i'm being fucking played then i would've stayed with tatyana but no i took a damn chance with you and you're just showing me that girls ain't shit and maybe no girl is worth the love and attention i have because you really think going with dejuane is fucking helping anything between us then you're fucking delusional
Y: ok i get that but i went to waffle house and i didn't even expect dejuane to be there he came without me knowing
Kobe: i really don't give a fuck it's to the point where maybe you are just like every other girl maybe you aren't serious about this relationship like i am
Y: but i am
Kobe: you can't be because someone who is wouldn't be going to there ex every second of the day y/n i really don't feel like you're what's best for me
Y: wait kobe don't say that ok i know i messed up going to dejuane but not once did i think about getting back with him all he did was calm me down and i don't mean in a sexual way so no i'm not playing you or cheating so why is that always the first thing that comes your mind when you think about me
Kobe: it's hard not to when all you do is go to your ex when we have a problem but y/n just do you i guess but i know next time we're done
Y: kobe i'm sorry i really am and you have to believe me when i say nothing is going on between me and dejuane
Kobe: it's hard to believe you so like i said next time you go to dejuane with our problems then we're done for good

kobe walks off while i stand there with tears streaming down my face so i close and lock the door then i walk upstairs and sit on my bed with my hands over my face crying and shaking my leg then i played music and shoved my face in my pillow crying some more until i got up and hesitantly went to kobe's room and i walked in sitting on his bed while he ignored me

Y: kobe
Kobe: y/n i said what i said get out
Y: i just want to apologize
Kobe: there not much you can say to me
Y: yes there is i'm sorry i went to dejuanes house i know it's wrong because you're right i would've been mad if you did it to me but i wasn't thinking but i can promise you that i didn't do anything with him nor did i think about it kobe i'm being so honest when i say i do love you and i'm taking this relationship seriously because i really want it to work and i know that means i'll have to sacrifice a few things but i love you i really do and i'm willing to sacrifice whatever i need to but it's just that with dejuane when he didn't tell me something it always ended up with him cheating behind my back and i looked like a clown and i know you're not the same way and i just have to get used to that but i promise whenever something happens between us i'll talk it out with you instead of going to someone else but i just you to forgive me baby
Kobe: uhh fine i forgive you and you know i love you too i can't stay mad at you for long but as long as you promise to come to me so we can solve our issues privately then everything will work out and the only thing i talked to tatyana about was asking her to come and see the kids more and i know i should've just told you that but i just didn't feel like talking about it and i understand that you might've got the impression that i was cheating since i was keeping secrets but i won't do that no more i promise y/n and i really want us to work out
Y: so do i kobe because i do love you
Kobe: i love you too
Y: can i have hugs and kisses
Kobe: after you shower because you smell like dejuane again
Y: sorry won't happen again

i go and shower and once i'm dressed in my pajamas i go on kobe's bed and jump on him while laughing and he wraps his arms around my back smiling and gives me a bunch of kisses while i smile and laugh then he started giving me a bunch of hickeys and one thing led to another then we laid down laughing and talking and also watching movies then we went to sleep

i'm about to order some dominos 😋