the MST3K gang riffs on bad stories i made when i was like nine

Asha and Crail- Chapter 5-end

Lexsi Marinn (L)

Crow T. Robot (C)

Tom Servo (T)

Gypsy (G)

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CHAPTER 5

ACARIDIAN SHIP 18

"YOU HAVE ONE MESSAGE" Said the Acaridian Ship 18's computer, Fauna. "Read the message." Said Sythia. "Crail, we are happy you are alive. (CRRRR) Me and the crew are going to save you. (CRRRRR) Send your coordinates. (CRRRR) Bye Crail, stay safe. This was Asha." Said Asha on the computer.

C- You see how it all just neatly ties together?

"Crail, explain this." Said Sythia. "MESSAGE HAS ENDED. SEND ONE BACK?" "Sush, you stupid computer." Crail said. "Calling for an SOS, have you?" "Yeah, this DUMP is SOOOOO BORINGGG!" "I have to agree."

T- (Falsetto) "I do need to work on my grammar."

"Yeah." "IT WAS YOUR FAULT FOR LETTING ASHA TAKE YOU ONTO THE SHIP! MY SHIP!" "Yeah, we DESERVE it!" Said Crail, shooting his gun and exiting the Acaridian Ship 18 in one of it's escape pods.

G- Guns?

C- Come on, Lex, really?

L- It's a space book!

"WELCOME... I AM FAUNA, THE ACARIDIAN SHIP 18'S SMART COMPUTER. WHERE DO YOU WISH TO TRAVEL?"

C- The names for these AI computers are so weird... Lara... Fauna...

L- That's because they were made by young Tony Stark. It took a while for him to work out the kinks, so...

C- Ohhh...

Said a voice in the escape pod. "MOTHERSHIP 0.1 please!" Crail said. As Fauna was making the pod travel to the Mothership, Fauna started to talk. "SPECIMEN IN CARRIER, SENT BY MOTHERSHIP 0.1"

G- 0.1? I wonder what happened to the other 0.9...

L- Good one, Gypsy! See?

Said Fauna. "Ok, send it down." Crail said. A purple-green packet plopped down from the pod roof. On the packet, there was a note, it read:

Crail, come quick! Inside the packet there is a boost pack. For what you ask? Why, to ESCAPE THE HECKING ESCAPE POD!

C- I love how she doesn't use profanity, how polite.

Our cruel mother has planted bombs in the escape pod to blow up at about 1:17! Quick, Crail! Our Mothership coordinates are coded onto the boost pack. Crail, you are running out of time! Open the pod's emergency hatch, put your oxygen helmet and the boost pack on, AND GET YOUR BUTT OUT OF THERE!

T- Why yes, very polite.

Asha (GET THE HECK OUTTA THERE!)

ALL- Very polite.

"Uh-oh." Crail said to himself. "Fauna, what time is it?" "IT IS 1:15, SIR." Said Fauna. "Man, Fauna. I don't want to leave you. You helped me make my daring escape.

C- (Giggling) D-daring?!

You drove me out here in an escape pod." Crail sighed. He had been in there since 9:00 A.M.!

L- Time flies when you're Crail!

"I UNDERSTAND, SIR. I DON'T WANT TO BE LONELY ALL OVER AGAIN.

C- Oh, shut up.

PERHAPS YOU TAKE MY SYSTEM INTO YOUR POCKET BEFORE YOU LEAVE. GO TO THE EMERGENCY HATCH, AND GRAB THAT LITTLE MICROCHIP TITLED FAUNA. IT IS 1:16." Said Fauna. Crail opened the pack and got the oxygen helmet and boost pack on, he then got the microchip title Fauna. "G... GREAT J.. JOB S... SIR, SEE YOU..." Said Fauna. "Yes! I picked up the right piece!" Crail said.