the MST3K gang riffs on bad stories i made when i was like nine

*deeeeep inhale*

George: Alright, for the next two stories, I'm splitting you all into teams.

All: (groaning)

George: Crow, Joel, Jonah, and Lexsi- team one. Gypsy, Mike, Tom, and Emily- team two. You will all alternate based on my command. Remember: It's a very, very long and stupid story.

All: (groaning)

George: Also, I lied about the page count.

All: (confused groaning?)

George: I got an anonymous tip that the story is 121 pages long, NOT 160.

Lexsi: A tip?

George: Yes, I have someone here that's helping me out with lore accuracy, and stuff like that. No biggie.

Emily: I'm sorry...

Tom: No... Biggie?

George: What?

Mike: Oh, gee, I dunno, YES biggie?!

Jonah: You have an inside man?! Someone behind the scenes?!

George: My companion has requested their identity to remain anonymous as it may trigger emotions if they're revealed...

(protesting)

BEEP! BEEP!

Team One: WE GOT STORY SIGN!

6... 5.. 4... 3... 2... 1...