the MST3K gang riffs on bad stories i made when i was like nine

WC #1- Host Segment

(Emily and Jonah are looking at Lexsi and Gypsy)

Emily: Aren't they so cute with their coloring books?

(Jonah nods)

Emily: But Lexsi...

(Lexsi struggles coloring within the lines)

Emily: What is she gonna do when she's a bankteller and she needs perfect handwriting? She's having some issues... Sending... Too much viewers running for the hills with her terribleness...

(silence. Jonah is looking at Cambot)

Emily: Cambot.

(Text appears onscreen: "And about the incident..." And Jonah acts as if he's saying it)

Emily: Yes... Mike Nelson and Joel Robinson have both been rated the best for Leader of the Satellite... But you, Jonah, had convinced George Forrester that I was the best, but he chose Joel instead. So we killed George.

(Cambot text: "They did?" But Jonah doesn't act it out. Cambot's just yapping)

Emily: But then Joel became leader and Mike became second in command.

(Cambot: "Why the hell are we doing this, then?")

(Emily and Jonah look at Cambot again.)

(After a moment, Cambot text: "I promise you. Lexsi will be dead by morning." Jonah acts it out.)

Gypsy: Trying to kill LEXSI MARINN? NEVER! (eats Emily)

BEEP! BEEP!

ALL: WE GOT STORY SIGN!

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