life updates for anyone who cares

emancipation

sooooo i accidentally spilled the tea on why i was upset with my stupid sister when she asked me why i was upset and i said "bc i realised where i stand"

wow.

can you think of a more 'i have high self esteem' approach?

so i feel like im being emancipated from my sister - i realised how attached i am to her. and i feel disgusting that it wasn't reciprocated.

the things that piss me off about her are all things we have fought about: she will leave us for a random guy on the internet (She's ready to); she's desperate to get married and doesn't acc have a list of things she wants in a partner (ik bc i asked her and she literally replied hand-holding); she craves attention like it's a drug (if i could link her twitter, i would, she acc finds her self-worth in how many liberaliyoon she can piss off)

sooooo shes basically a basic pick-me with very few redeeming qualities. like shes an unhealthy narcissist and lies about how family matters to her (we don't) how do i know this? bc shes full of 'feelings' but only recognises the 'cOmPlEXiTiEs' of those feelings in herself and never in others. if i have a str8 face on... she'll assume im just 'mad' and not 'contemplating' etc (tbh my whole family thinks this)... but she really does not know how to joke around.

like today, we went to maccas to get a soft serve bc my  cramps were literally killing me and i was craving smth sweet and my mum, as all mums, didn't get anything exclusively for herself and so she just eats bits and pieces off of everyone (which we're all sort of used to) and it defs does kind of get annoying but i remind myself that she is my mother and a little bite of food shouldn't annoy me - i reprimand myself - bc this is how shaytan makes us disobey our parents. anyways, so my mum ate half the soft serve and gave the rest to my dad, and then said to my sister, jokingly:

"now im gonna eat some of your sundae" and then my dumbass sister says:

"lIkE ApI wHeN ShE wAs YoUnGEr" *facepalm* i wanted to kms deadass

and not bc i was mentioned... but bc she really compared my childish greediness to how my mum just is. and my mum obviously reclused after laughing a little bit - and then she didn't even ask another time. and i just felt so angry like how self-centered can someone be?

and how can this self-centered try to convince everyone around her that she doesn't wanna get married for the romantic attention she will be getting bc she hasn't gotten it from anyone else in her life - which is exactly why she is holding onto this dumbass adam so tightly?

like oh no dont let this arab d*** escape, how will i ever find another one?

and the dumbass doesn't realise that that exact mindset is why she can't find another one.

when you tell yourself someone is 'the one' for you... they are all you see.

that doesn't mean other good candidates don't exist... that means everything about this person is confirmation bias to your brain.

idk why she wants to marry an arab supremacist so bad - even tho he has made sure, on multiple occasions, to ridicule pakis and other nationalties - and then she tries to tell me she's not an 'emotional thinker'

LMFAOOOOOOO

i'd hardly call that terrible taste in men a logical decision.

imagine trying to marry someone who has to convince their families not to be racist towards you... LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL. someone end me

does she really think smth as ingrained as arab supremacism can be removed from a conversation of "bUt I LiKe hEr' this girl is as stupid as stupid gets. racism is intrinsically ingrained - that means you acc can't 'remove' it from your unconscious... you can only control it.