Ok, so I want to make a really serious rant right now. Please sit tight and read through it all, because I'm digging really deep for it.
It's about suicide.
And self harm.
And any kind of dark thought that might pop into your head.
I want all of you to look me in the eye and honestly tell me that you've never thought of or attempted any of these things.
I know for a fact that if I said that, I would be lying.
Everyone has their own reasons for having these kinds of thoughts. I'm not asking you to share them, so please don't feel pressured to.
For me, personally, it's been because of my parents, usually my mom. Shit's happened in my life that's made me want to die or crawl into a hole and never see the light of day ever again.
But then I think of what the result of that would be. Not for me, but the people around me.
I'm not hating on anyone who self-harms or commits suicide or anything like that. Let me explain myself.
When you commit suicide, for example, it's, in a way, a bit selfish.
The people who do that to themselves are thinking about how much better a world might be without them, but they aren't thinking about the people that love them.
No one in this world is completely friendless. I understand that not all families are as loving as others, but there's still going to be at least one person, somewhere, who cares about them. They may not even know it, but they're still there.
Also, to the people who read this book, there are internet friends. The people you know personally might find out and shed a tear, but for Internet friends, you could just randomly disappear from your Wattpad or Twitter or Tumblr and never post again and they'll be stuck sending you message after message wondering where you are and why you aren't answering. And if you don't have an Internet friend, I'm right here, completely willing to be your friend. Message me if you want, just comment right here and I'll talk to you.
Everyone is going to have their dark days, and there's nothing anyone can do about that. Nothing but be there to support you the whole way through, and never, ever leave your side no matter what.
You were given a life, and you deserve to live it. I don't want any of you damaging the precious gift you've been given.
Please, please, please just think before you act on anything. There are people who are here for you and who care about you. If you leave, you'll be hurting them, and that could make the cycle go on and on and never end.
I don't know exactly what brought this on today, but I want you all to know that I love you with all my heart and I don't want to lose any of you ever. Each and every one of you is special, and you were made for a reason.
-Catherine xx
