Colleen POV
We enjoyed the rest of our alone time together. Josh needed me more than he thought and I think he was more relaxed as he calmed down. We met back with the family and enjoyed our last few days as a family before flying home. We had decided to not tell anyone else about Josh's diagnosis. He wanted it that way.
Two days after we arrived home was Josh's first appointment. He was in the shower getting ready and he was super quiet. He was thinking and thinking and his heart was a mess. I walked into the washroom and can see him through the glass shower walls. He is standing in the water with his face in his hands quietly crying. He doesn't know I see him so I throw my tshirt off and open the door to the shower to join him. He turns around and sees me and hugs me. "Joshua, I am here baby" I say squeezing him. "Did you hear me crying?" he asks. "No babe, I knew because I could feel my heart hurting so I came to find you" I say running my fingers through his hair. He leans his forehead against mine and smiles. I kiss him tenderly. "Lets get this day over with" he says as he grabs the shampoo and we finish up.
"Josh whats going to happen is we will give you radiation treatment for 20 minutes. I will give you some meds to get filled for nausea which should last for a few days. We will do a scan in a week and determine if you will need another treatment" the doctor says. I look at Josh and grab his hand. "One thing I should tell you is that this treatment will make you sterile. It will kill your sperm but since you were in my office for a vasectomy I am guessing that is ok with you" he says. "We are done yes" I say. "Josh I will also give you some cream for your skin for any burns that may turn up over the next few days" he says. We both look at Josh and he has tears down his face. "Josh we caught it. This is good to catch it this early plus you have your kids already" he says. Josh nods. "Its true babe" I say. "Ok I will give you a second before we start" he says as he leaves the room. I wrap my arms around Josh as he hugs me tight. "Babe I will take really good care of you. You will be fine. I love you" I say smiling. I give him a big kiss and turn to walk away to wait in the waiting room. I start crying as soon as I turn from him. Once I walk out I see Rachel sitting there waiting for me. She surprised me. I walk into her open arms and we hug each other tight. "He has got to be ok" I say grasping onto her. "Colleen he will sis, he will" she says.
