words from a broken soul

Courage

Courage is the strength to change things
Change requires courage to be better
Unlearn the generational trauma to learn
How to love yourself and so much more
It took courage for me to share these
Poems took it to even write them in the
First place over fifty thousand words
In just a few months over a year truth
It took courage to keep up the work
Find my own style of writing the way I want
Courage is the strength to change things

It take courage to admit you have issues
But it takes even more courage to find your
Voice when the world wants you dead or
When people have doubts if your faking
Something for attention because normal
Is subjective and abnormal is all I've known
Thanks to growing up in a hell that I just
Became cold and numb to I've turned
Myself into a ghost to survive it yet I'm
Just a copy of the lad who chose suicide
Threw himself down a well so to speak
It takes courage to keep your fire burning
Making sure it doesn't become embers nor
Mere smoke and in a world full of horrors
Full of Nightmares pretending to be human
Courage is the strength to change things

Courage is looking back at your mistakes
And admitting that you could do better but
All you can do is apologize to those who
You snapped at those you made miserable
It won't fix the relationship but it's what
Matters because sometimes an apology
Make them realize that you didn't mean
To do what you did but that's in the past
Own up to it in the present makes sure
You don't repeat the same mistakes ever
Courage is asking for help when you're
Battling depression and anxiety in silence
Courage is the strength to change things

The courage is need for me to embrace
My emotions instead of killing them for
Seeing them as a weakness but that what
I was taught courage is changing that for
That's not a way I should live my life even
If I still can't view myself as anything but
A ghost that's puppeting a corpse that has
Mange to have a pulse am I truly living or
Am I still trying to survive from a hell that
Was left long ago but the scars are still
There branded on my soul and psyche
For the flashbacks when will they be given
To me by that damn abysmal void whose
Voice is the void using from my past that
Will never be answered I fear like so many
Of the questions I have about myself and
The past that haunts me within my shadows
Courage is the strength to change things

It's courage that I use to remind myself
What love is and that I can be loved no
Matter how much I see myself as a mirror
That fractured from abuse I endured in silence
For it takes courage to find one's voice
Speak out against the misery you endured
There's just so many things that takes
Courage to do even if it's just surviving for
Another day you made it to the next when
You just want to jump off a cliff I know
From experience of drowning in the rain
Of thoughts that are just pure negative
It takes courage to find a light when you're
Lost in a never ending darkness but it's
Worth it when you do find the light in the dark
Courage is the strength to change things