words from a broken soul

Compartmentalize

Humans do it willingly and subconsciously
Yet its for various reasons all tied to something
Bigger the surface is shallow till your eyes
Adjust see the depth of the issues behind
The mask listen as thoughts drown you
Feel the rain of sweat flood you with dread
Remembering the misery you thought you
Left behind and destroyed yet the lock on
This compartment is broken the myriad
Things that haunt you free of the shadows
A cursed blood that's half dead the ghost
Controlling a corpse as a puppet the line
Blurry memories forcing you down a path
One best forgotten but cannot be for it has
It's claws to far deep they pierce the soul
Grip deathly cold in nature the fires try to
Free you yet all you see are horrors and
Nightmares yet you press on unsure of
Life but you keep going spite perhaps
Humans do it willingly and subconsciously

But what happens when the lock shatters
Broken a mirror shattered by a bang inner
Workings lie around terrified of the things
Clawing into your mind a fractured psyche
Yet you keep getting up It's admirable if not
For the lack of sense lad is that why you can
Keep getting up the pain in you does it not
Hurt and yet you'll willingly step closer to
Fire uncaring of the harm born from the chaos
Can't stuff the horrors back in the box can
You burn em in to smoke and ash choke as
The fog turns the air into winter bitter cold
Suffocate in silence to not be a burden yet
It's not going well no its worse than before
The battles and scars run deep yet you try
To shrug them off almost to casually even
As you're burning on the inside emotions
From memories of the past heartache pain
Two sides one coin which is more pleasant
You tell me can never understand you how
Easy it is to subject to the toxicity you grew
Up in how do you handle it a copy of someone else
A shell that's more of an untreated blade dull and incomplete
Husk maybe suits you best hollow and dead
Trying to live when you were forced into
The chaos witnessed too much and questioned
How you can't just stuff the horror back down
Can they understand when things break free
They'll get harder to contain and for how
Long before another lock lies broken at your feet
Humans do it willingly and subconsciously

And yet here we are an impasse you try
To forget it all and yet you never can for
It was burned into your soul an ash filled
Hole but are there embers in the ash can
You spark the flames or do they just sit
And wait to die out change from warm to
Deathly cold unable to be lit nothing can
Cause a pit to light ablaze when the embers
Have fully died or are we already unaware
Of it watching life through the bitter window
Seeking things we never had just to burn
Them can't control fire you know that it
Burns indiscriminately yet you make it
Char your skin so you carry the burden of
A bridge you burned wondering what went
Wrong were you too much or to little was
It your brash nature that is truly shy or
Will you just stuff all these into a compartment
And hope the lock won't break not having
Faith to believe it will hold for you know
It won't not permanently it's temporary
And that's enough how is a brief reprieve
Worth it know one day the lock is broken
Feel all this flood back into you try to kill
It again that's never worked has it the things
You do not remember all without drinking poison
It makes you wonder how you do it how
Can you keep the turmoil down without
Alcohol it's not an easy feat but you don't
Want to be like the nightmares who raised you
That's my guess but what do I know
Humans do it willingly and subconsciously