words from a broken soul

Words

I've been told I'm good with words a lie
In my eyes I'm just winging it yet when
I put them onto paper I'm lost in my own
World music blaring and just type what
I feel the words just bleed out of me
So no I don't believe I'm good with them
Not when I struggle to say what I want
But here lost in the music of others I find
It's easier to go with the flow of my caged
Mind a voice that's great for depression yet
Never heard because I'm a ghost In control
Of a corpse to someone I've never knew
Shoved into the husk learned to make it
Mine yet this face is everything I curse
I'm not someone who I watched die I'm
A copy of his words his ideas left in place
Stagnant like a dead river yet I still drown
The forest is filled with a noose no matter
Where I look I see one made out of
Remains to bridges I torched to save
Others from myself a savior complex yet
What is there to save a soul weighed by
Ash and smoke embers flickering and dying
A cold flame no matter how much fuel it
Uses sheds no warmth onto me for I'm just
A ghost controlling this corpse wishing for
The noose to tighten yet when it does it pulls
Me off the cliff bear witness to the horrors
Of past demons and battles that lurk in my
Shadows there's beauty and darkness yet
The light is void from eyes replaced by
Uncertainty acceptance of misery for what
Hell I endured got used to the nightmares
Become one with silence and observation
Killed my emotions in a ploy to be seen as
Strong learned it made me weaker yet the
Cycle persists a wound filled with maggots
Left to fester forgotten to be patched
I've been told I'm good with words a lie

All my life I've worn a mask of the dead
Can't take it off for where does it end and
I begin forced the lies down my throat trusted
The poison I've been having to fight blood
Half dead for the sins it carries with in yet
I live with it but won't spread it no I'm not
Gonna risk becoming more like my demons
The grip of the noose burns yeah but I've
Come to welcome it the flashbacks aren't
Real the mind and body are glitched reset
Restart the psyche but don't stop the battle
Live another day fight like hell for what you
Know as truth but your body sees as a lie
It's all easier said than done but the impossible
Is never impossible it just seems that way
A weary soul lost in the sea finds faith to
Be saved from drifting but realizes not that
They must save themselves to save others
Actions speak louder but voices go unheard
Those of the downtrodden get drowned out
Discarded for being abnormal when normal
Doesn't exist in life there's nor normal just
Tame and unknown sane and insanity I walk
A line of sane and insanity drained by things
That became burned into me a name I hate
For I am not the names owner a body I've
Grown accustomed to yet it feels alien
Words I say feel like mine but are they truly
I've been told I'm good with words a lie