Luke's Diary: An Unlucky Man in a Zombie Apocalypse. Days 201-400

Day 305: Tuesday 27th June 2017 20:58

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Day 305
Tuesday 27th June 2017 20:58

I'm finally out of that Evil Dead cabin and I'm alive, but you won't believe what's happened.

I was passed out on the floor in the grim cabin, half dead and in a weak, pathetic heap. I eventually regained consciousness and when I opened my eyes I was looking directly at the bottom half of two sets of legs. I flickered my eyes as I heard mumbled voices talking to each other, sounding worried. When I fully regained consciousness I realised that the legs might belong to Hilary who'd come to finish me off. Feeling scared that I was about to be killed, I quickly scuttled to the other side of the room as fast as my weak body would let me. Having no weapons and feeling really frail and fragile I wasn't in the best position to defend myself but I still had to try. "Get away from me," I snapped, "Just get away from me." I was coiled on the floor looking up at two attractive women in their twenties. They were both wearing climbing gear, hiking boots and scruffy sportswear. They looked like they were about to abseil down a tall building. "It's OK," said one of the women, "We're not going to hurt you." "Who are you?" I asked with an edgy tone. "I'm Lauren and this is Sarah," said Lauren. I stopped and gave them both a cautious and uncertain look. They were obviously two new people to Dumpville I thought to myself, but I wasn't sure if they'd been sent to find me by Naomi and the others, or if they'd been sent to collect me by Dump and Hilary. "Who sent you?" I cautiously asked. "Sent us?" asked a confused Lauren. "Yes," I snapped, "You heard me. You've obviously only been here about a week. You must have arrived while I was out on a run, so tell me and tell me now, did Dump send you here or have you been out looking for me along with Naomi and the others?" "What the Hell are you talking about?" asked Sarah, "Who're Dump and Naomi?" I looked at both of the women and felt scared. Their lack of knowledge about who Dump and Naomi were made me feel even more suspicious of them but also very anxious regarding Naomi and Dump's whereabouts. "Are you telling me they're not here?" I said, "Dump's not here? Naomi's not here? Is that what you're saying?" "No one's here," Sarah exclaimed, "What are you talking about?" "No one's here?" I said, "Everyone's gone?" I suddenly felt very isolated and abandoned. I stared into space for a few seconds. I couldn't believe this. "They've left me," I said, "They all went to City One and left me." Sarah turned to Lauren. She looked p*ssed off. "Right," she said, "This guy's crazy. I say we should just leave him here." "We can't just leave him here," said Lauren, "We need him remember. Anyway look at him. He's half dead. He needs food and water." "Water?!" I said feeling excited as my eyes lit up, "Have you got water?" Sarah rolled her eyes, opened her back pack and threw a bottle of water at me. I quickly grabbed it before it could hit the floor. I ripped the top off and gulped down the cold liquid within seconds. It felt SO good. "Oh that was great," I said, "Have you got any more?" "Or, thank you, as some people might say," said Sarah.  She then looked at Lauren and frowned. "Sorry Lauren but this guy's unhinged. He isn't all there. We've got enough on our plate, we don't need the hassle. We've already done enough to help him. First we put him in here and now we're giving him our water." As the pair carried on talking I interrupted them after I clocked what Sarah had said. "Wait a minute," I said sounding extremely confused, "YOU put me in here? What do you mean, YOU put me in here?" "I mean the two of us put you in here," said Sarah, "What don't you understand about that?" "Hilary put me in here," I said. "Who's Hilary?" asked Lauren. "The psycho that knocked me out and brought me here," I said. "There's no Hilary, no psycho and no one knocked you out," said Sarah, "All though I'm getting more eager to whack you. I think you're the only psycho round here." "We found you not far from here," said Lauren, "You were on the ground unconscious. We put you in here to keep you safe." "What?" I angrily exclaimed, "You find an unconscious man so you bring him to the scariest cabin in the world and lock him in? Why the Hell did you do that?" "We did it to keep you safe," said Lauren. "Yeah. A thank you wouldn't go a miss," said Sarah. "A thank you?!" I exclaimed, "Are you taking the p*ss!? I get knocked unconscious and you pair of b*tches bring me here and lock me up in the cabin in the woods with no food, no water, surrounded by horrific mould, severed fingers and three month old blood splattered up the wall, and you want me to thank you!!" "Severed fingers?" asked Lauren. "Yes," I snapped, "Have a look in that hell hole that's used for a kitchen. This is probably someone's torture cabin. Probably Hilary's. I mean what the Hell is wrong with you two? You find an unconscious man, lock him up in a sh*thole like this and just leave him here." Lauren looked in the kitchen. "That's disgusting," she said, "He's right, there's blood, there's fingers, it's awful." "Putting you in here was better than the alternative," said Sarah, "We were surrounded by infected, we were being chased. We couldn't run AND carry you so we had to leave you in here. You'd be dead if it wasn't for us." "I was nearly dead BECAUSE of you," I exclaimed, "Locking me up in a cabin that resembles the toilet from 'Saw'". I gave a big sarcastic smile and put my thumbs up. "Thanks for that." "You ungrateful b*stard," said Sarah, "We saved your life." "Why the Hell didn't you take me somewhere else?!" I loudly snapped, "There's loads of chalets through those woods. You could have put me there; a nice sofa, a comfy bed. No hacked off limbs or pools of blood." "Listen to me you f*cking lunatic," snapped Sarah, "One, we were being chased by hundreds of those things, so picking your preferred accommodation of choice wasn't high on our list of priorities. You're lucky we helped you at all, and two, there are no chalets out there you complete freak. Where the Hell do you think we are? Butlins?!" "You're the lunatic," I said, "Have you been walking around this place with your eyes shut? I know you haven't been here that long but you must know where you are." "What do you mean, 'that long?' we've been here months," said Lauren. "Months?" I said, sounding confused, "No you haven't; I'VE been here for months. You arrived when I was out on a run." Sarah and Lauren looked confused. "Where do you think you are?" asked Lauren. "Seashells Holiday Park on the coast," I said. "Jesus," said Sarah, "That bang on the head must have really f*cked up his brain. The little weirdo thinks he's on holiday." "What do you mean 'the coast'?" asked Lauren, "The coast," I said, "The coast of England. Seaside, donkeys, beaches, candy floss. You know, all that sort of stuff." "Why do you think you're in England?" asked Lauren. I looked at the women with a confused expression which quickly turned into one of panic. I stood up, and even though I was weak and unsteady on my feet, I quickly made my way out of the cabin, hurried through the woods and arrived into a clearing at the top of a large hill overlooking a large, abandoned city, severely affected by the outbreak. In the distance was a large tower. Lauren and Sarah joined me as I looked on in shock with my body covered in goose bumps. "Where the Hell am I?" I gasped, "Is that Blackpool Tower? Am I in Blackpool?" "Are you being deliberately stupid?" asked Sarah, "That's obviously not the Blackpool Tower, it's the Eiffel Tower." I turned and looked at Sarah with an angry but confused expression. "The Eiffel Tower?" I said, "The Eiffel Tower in Paris?!" "No," said Sarah, sarcastically, "The Eiffel Tower in Zimbabwe. Of course the Eiffel Tower in Paris." "ARE YOU TELLING ME I'M IN FRANCE?!" I yelled. "Of course you're in France," said Lauren, "How can you not know where you are?" I dropped to the ground, weakened by the shock. "I don't get it," said Sarah, "What's wrong with you? Why are you being like this?" "How did I get here?" I asked. "How can you not know how you got here?" asked Sarah, "Look we haven't got time for this. Can you still fly it or not?" I frowned. "He can't fly it now," said Lauren, "Look at him, he's exhausted." "You were the one that said we needed him," Sarah said to Lauren. "Fly what?" I asked, "What are you talking about?" "You know what we're talking about!" Sarah loudly said, "You know how you got here so just stop playing games and tell us!" "Tell you what?" I loudly snapped, "I don't know what you're talking about." Sarah picked me up by the scruff of my neck and dragged me through the woods with Lauren close behind. I protested loudly and tried to get free but Sarah had a firm grip. "Be careful, don't hurt him," said Lauren. "Hurt him?!" exclaimed Sarah, "I'll get kick the sh*t out of him. He's doing my head in." We started approaching the clearing on the other side of the woods and as I was dragged past the final few trees, Sarah threw me out into the clearing. "There!" she loudly said, "That's what I'm talking about." I looked ahead to see a large helicopter that looked like it had crash landed into the side of a tree. "That's a helicopter," I said. "Well done genius," said Sarah, "We know what it is. Can you get it working or not?" "Me?!" I exclaimed, "What do you think I am? Some sort aviation expert or something?" "Well you were piloting the thing," said Sarah. "No I wasn't!" I loudly said, "I can't fly a bl**dy helicopter. Why would you think I could?" "Maybe he's got amnesia," Lauren said, looking at Sarah. "I haven't got f*cking amnesia," I snapped, "I was with my friends. We were all living together in this self-contained community. An old holiday park on the cost of England. It was run by this bossy dictator called Ronald Dump. We found out that he was giving people to these cannibals. My friends and I got the proof we needed to expose Dump, so we confronted him. That's when we found out he was in league with this piece of scum called Hilary. An evil bloke who's raped, tortured and abused us all. Dump shot and killed my friend DeShawn and then Hilary knocked me unconscious. The next thing I know I'm waking up in that sh*thole and then a week later you turn up. I thought Hilary had thrown me in there to torture me. I thought I was still at the holiday park." Lauren and Sarah looked very confused. "Well if you wasn't piloting the helicopter, who was?" asked Lauren. "I've got no idea," I said, "Maybe it was Hilary. Maybe, after he knocked me out, he drugged me and brought me here. He probably wanted to make me suffer in his little torture cabin." "We found you here at the crash site," said Lauren, "We saw the helicopter hovering above and could see that it was in trouble. We ran to the clearing and arrived just after it crash landed into the tree. When we got here you were on your own. You'd been thrown from the helicopter and you were unconscious on the floor." "I was on my own?" I asked. "Yes," said Sarah, "That's why we thought you were the pilot." "We hoped you'd be able to fix it and get it working again so you could take us back home," said a disappointed Lauren. "We picked you up, but the crash attracted loads of the infected," said Sarah, "They just appeared from nowhere. We put you in the cabin and locked you in there so the infected didn't get you." "Well you took your time coming back for me," I said. "There's only two of us," said Lauren, "The infected were in between us and the cabin. We couldn't get to you. We had to wait for them to disperse. We were always going to come back for you." "I'm beginning to wish we hadn't have bothered," said Sarah, "We thought you were our ticket out of here. Now we're all stuck here together." "How did you manage to lock me in the cabin?" I asked with a suspicious tone. "It locked from the outside," said Sarah, "Are you trying to imply something?" "It's just convenient isn't it?" I said. "Please," said Lauren, "Let's not fight. We all just need to calm down." "Anyway," said Sarah, "If this Hilary bloke was piloting this thing, then where is he?" "I don't know, do I?" I snapped, "How many times do I have to tell you? I was unconscious." "So you were knocked unconscious, then drugged and you remained out of it for the entire journey from England to France where you crash landed, and this mysterious pilot Hilary disappeared," said Sarah, "Some could say that's awfully convenient." I was about to snap at Sarah but Lauren interrupted. "Just shut up!" she shouted, "We should be helping each other, not fighting." Sarah and I stayed quiet. It was obvious we were upsetting Lauren. I realised I hadn't introduced myself, so I told Sarah and Lauren my name and they walked me to their camp.

On the far side of the woods Lauren and Sarah were holed up in a large camper van. Sarah showed me the perimeter she'd set up around the large motorhome; a line of fishing wire was tied around the trees and surrounding the vehicle. She'd hung empty cans and other noisy items from the wire which helped alert her and Lauren to oncoming infected. They don't have many weapons. A baseball bat and a few sharp knives but they've got an OK amount of food.

The campervan isn't luxurious but it's a grade above basic. We agreed that I needed food and rest so I've spent most of the day in one of the spare bedrooms eating tinned fruit, gobbling hot pasta and gulping down lots of water. Eating so much food so quickly made me feel dizzy but thankfully I was left alone to enjoy the peace and quiet in a comfortable bed. Lauren seems OK but Sarah obviously doesn't like me. Mind you, I don't really like her. I'll try and get a good night's sleep and get my body back to normal. Maybe tomorrow I can find out more about these two women. I need to figure out how I'm going to get back to England and to the others. I hope they're all are OK. I'm worried about them all; especially Auntie Meryl. I can't believe I thought they could have all left me. It turns out I left them! Well, I was taken away from them. Mind you, for all I know they might have left Dumpville days ago. I need to be on my guard in case Hilary is around here somewhere. I can't believe the slimy b*stard had flown me here to Paris, probably so he could torture me. I can't believe I'm in Paris! I'm actually in Paris!