Luke's Diary: An Unlucky Man in a Zombie Apocalypse. Days 201-400

Day 329: Friday 21st July 2017 20:48

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Day 329
Friday 21st July 2017 20:48

I can now drive a car!

I'm actually feeling really chuffed with myself. I've never been bothered about driving so I never thought I'd get the hang of it, but I have. YEAH! Being in a car for most of the day with Dump hasn't been very enjoyable as he has taken every available opportunity to tell me what a failure I am and how I'm a pathetic excuse for a man. Tw*t! I told him that because I was now able to drive, Mike and I would go out on a much needed run tomorrow and look for food and supplies. "Well that's when I'll leave too," he said, "I've had it with this place." "How the mighty have fallen," I said, "Not so high and mighty now eh?" Dump gave me an evil stare. "Do you know, that's your problem," I said to him, "You can dish out the insults and the criticisms but you can't take it can you?" Dump frowned at me, then he quickly replaced his unhappy facial expression with one of overexcited glee. "Well it's been a pleasure been you're driving instructor, Luke," he said, "I think you can now drive a car . . . well I think you'll be able to do a good enough job. I don't think you'd pass an actual driving test but I don't think the DVLA are going to mind." I'm so happy I can now drive and I'm even happier that I don't have to spend any more time on my own in a car with Dump.

Later on, I saw the others. Mike's successfully taught Mia and TJ how to drive so they were celebrating. Troy and Trudy couldn't get the hang of it but it now means there are three more of us that can drive. When I walked up to everyone and started joining in with the celebrations they all went quiet. I asked them what was wrong and it became obvious they were in a mood with me because I was hanging around with Dump. "Oh grow up," I snapped, "It's not like he's my best friend. We needed more of us to know how to drive so he's been teaching me. Needs must. What do you think we've been doing? Bonding over my driving lessons?" "Well you look like you've been enjoying yourself," said TJ, "I saw you driving up and down Main Street laughing your head off, enjoying a joke." "Enjoying a joke?" I exclaimed, "We spent most of the time insulting each other, and anyway you can hardly talk. A few weeks ago you were Dump's best mate, remember?" "Look, Luke," said TJ, "All I know is that you seem to be making deals with him left, right and centre. You brought him back from Paris when you should have just left him there and then you let him out of quarantine to teach you how to drive." "I had to bring him back from France," I snapped, "How many times do I have to keep going over this?" "Well you didn't have to let him out of the chalet, did you?" said Troy, "You could have left him there. TJ and Mia know how to drive now. Letting him wander freely around here just so we've got one extra person who can drive seems a bit stupid." "Really?" I said, "Well if this place gets overrun with infected and we're all scattered all over the place you might be glad that I can drive us out of here." "Well I'm less worried about the infected out there and more worried about the big orange blob walking around in here," said Trudy. "Fine," I snapped, holding my hands up, "I'm a pr*ck. I'm an absolutely useless, selfish, inconsiderate pr*ck. I've made all these deals with Dump just for the sake of it and I've loved spending time with him on my own in that car. In fact he's my best friend. In fact, I'm in love with him. There, is that what you want to hear!?" "Well you're acting like you're proper bum chums," said TJ. "Totally," said Troy, "And I know a lot about what bum chums behave like." "Look he's going tomorrow," I said, "Dump's taking a car and he's going to leave." "You going to go with him?" asked TJ, "Drive off into the sunset together?" "Hang on," said Trudy, "You're just going to let him have a car? Jesus, Luke, why don't you just suck him off and be done with it?" "I bet he's already done that," said TJ. "What do you want me to do?" I snapped, "You've all said you don't like the idea of him hanging around here, so he's going to leave." "You shouldn't have brought him back here in the first place," said Trudy. "Well I can't turn back time," I said. "That's a Cher song," sad Troy, "God she's looking rough these days." "Do you know what," I said, "The lot of you can just do one. I brought Dump back from France because he was the only one who could steer the boat. I didn't want to be stuck in France on my own. I let him teach me how to drive so that we had as many drivers here as possible. Everything I've done has been to keep me alive and help us ALL survive. Can't you see that?" Everyone exchanged uncertain and unconvinced looks. I shook my head in annoyance. "Do you know what?" I said, "Maybe you should all learn to have a bit of faith in me. I know what I'm doing." "What's that supposed to mean?" asked a confused Trudy. "Forget it," I snapped. I stormed off feeling frustrated. I don't know what everyone's problem is. I, more than anyone, know what an absolute ars*hole Dump is and everyone's childish and annoying comments are getting on my nerves. I wish they could see that I've only been spending time with him because I had to. Sacrifice is sometimes necessary. Oh God! I sound like Dump!

Later on I saw Dump coming out of the Kid's Club. I walked to him and assertively asked him what he was doing in there. "It's none of your business," he said, "Anyway I want that the car keys. You've still got them." "I'll give you them tomorrow," I said, "Now what were you doing in there?" "I wanted some space," said Dump, "Alright?" "Space?" I said sounding very suspicious, "You're in a massive holiday park and there's less than twenty five of us here. How much more space do you need? Even your ar*e isn't that fat." "Hilarious," Dump bluntly said, "Now give me the keys." "What were you doing in the Kid's Club?" I repeated. "Fine," said Dump, rolling his eyes, "If I'm going to leave here tomorrow I just wanted to take one last look around the place." I gave Dump a distrustful look. "I built this place up," he said, "I made it what it is." "That's nothing to be proud of," I said. "I just want to have one last look around," said Dump, "It's like saying goodbye. Now give me the keys." "I'll give them to you tomorrow," I said, "I'll meet you where all the cars are parked in the morning and give them to you then." "You better not be trying anything," said Dump with a scowl. "Same to you," I said. There was a tense and confrontational silence between us that lingered for a few moments. "Right," he said, "I will look forward to seeing you in the morning. Have a good night's sleep." Dump walked off and when he disappeared from view I went into the Kid's Club to look around. I was convinced that he was up to something but after looking around the building for about half an hour I couldn't see anything that seemed concerning.

A couple of the generators have run out of diesel and I haven't been able to have a shower, so me and Mike going out to look for supplies tomorrow has come at just the right time. I still think Dump's up to something but I don't know what it could be. I know he's been walking around the place freely and that I saw him acting oddly outside the Kid's Club earlier but I haven't seen him getting up to anything too concerning. I don't think he's the type to go quietly. I just hope he doesn't try anything and I hope he doesn't know what I'm planning . . . .