Luke's Diary: An Unlucky Man in a Zombie Apocalypse. Days 201-400

Day 314: Thursday 6th July 2017 16:07

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Day 314
Thursday 6th July 2017 16:07

I've been hung over all day and pretty much out of action. The day has been a right off.

Last night Dump found a crate of Smirnoff vodka hidden in a compartment behind the kitchen area. Dump moored the boat up somewhere safe and quiet and what proceeded was a night of drunkenness. It all started out rather civilised with us all agreeing that even though we are in a tense and unusual situation maybe we all deserve a drink. As I sit here now writing my diary with a banging headache and watching Dump being sick over the side, you can imagine how the night ended up. The crate had six big bottles of vodka in it and now there's just under three left. Last time I got this drunk was when I shagged Esther. God! I hope I haven't shagged Mike or Dump. There's a scary thought!

Mike doesn't look it sound too hung over. Maybe he didn't drink as much as us. He's been bringing me water and giving me shoulder massages all day.

God knows what happened last night but Dump's got dried blood all over his nose and I've got an awful black eye. I smell weird, my knob hurts and I feel a bit damp. I've been asking Mike what happened. He said I just need to relax and not stress myself out. Stress myself out about what, though!?

I'm going to stop writing now. I can't be arsed, I'm too tired, I feel rough and my eyes are hurting.

I'm going to go to bed now. Hopefully in the morning we'll all feel better than we do and we can start making our way to England. The yacht has been moored up for ages. It's not good; here we are in the apocalypse, trying to escape the infected and get back home and we decide to stop the boat, get p*ssed and stay here for a day without moving.

I hope some of my memory comes back tomorrow. My head in spinning!