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Inspired by the episode of Friends of the same name.
•••
Fred opened the door to the big, yellow house that was currently for sale. "My realtor told me this place would be perfect. It's two stories and has a huge backyard for Vegas."
"Vegas?" Mary questioned.
"The dog I'm going to adopt once I settle into my new home."
"This, Freddie, is why you're still lonely." Hermione bantered.
"Oh leave him alone," Mary said.
"Thank you," Fred nodded satisfied by her defending him.
"It's not his fault no one wants to date him."
"Just help me check this place out," Fred walked into the house. Mary and Hermione looked at each other and giggled. They loved to tease him. They heard Fred gasp, "I can put my little league trophies over the fireplace." He wandered into the living room.
"No that-" Hermione pointed to Fred pulling out a measuring tape out of his pocket. "-is why he's still single."
"Well you're the one that dated him senior year." Mary smirked. She began to make her way to the stairs.
"Shut up," Hermione followed her up.
Mary went into an empty room and looked out the window. She found Alice in the house right next door. She was surprised to learn that she lived next door, but she wasn't alone. Their good friend FP was with her. "Oh look there's Alice and FP," Mary waved at them in hopes of them seeing her. She gasped when she saw FP undressing Alice. "Oh!" Mary yelled before Hermione walked in. "FP and Alice! FP and Alice! My eyes!" Mary continued to yell. Hermione pulled her away from the window. "It's okay," Hermione tried to calm her down.
"They're doing it!" Mary pointed back at them.
"I know!" Hermione tried to get her full attention.
"You know?"
"Yes I know, and Tom knows, but Fred doesn't know so you have to stop screaming!"
"What's going on?" Fred came upstairs when he heard the commotion.
"We just love this place!" Hermione tried to keep him away from the window. Mary joined in and expressed the same excitement. Fred got caught up in the excitement and celebrated with them.
•••
Mary, Hermione, and Tom piled into a booth at the diner. They were discussing the secret relationship between their friends. "So they know that Tom knows but they don't know you know?" Mary asked Hermione for clarification.
