Ephemeral Affairs [MXM]

Hypocrisy

Nien and I move further away (but we can still see them) to the already chopped down trees that will be use for Nien's headquarter.

"Why do you hate Nillin?" I ask her with a gentle tone.

"I already told you. He killed my father," she sucks in her upper lip with fierce eyes.

"When father learned that Nillin is gathering an army to overthrow him, he said to me, 'Nien, you are my second child, when your brother take my head, bow and pledge your loyalty to your brother.'"

She pinches the bridge of her nose, "How can Nillin kill father when father was on his side? How can I bow to someone inferior to me? I spent my whole life in a study room while he walked zestfully on the streets!"

"What do you think he is thinking right now?"

"I don't know. Probably trying to kill me because I took you away from him," Nien rolls her eyes. "How is this relevant to me?"

"Do you think you can win against Nillin?" I ask firmly.

Nien averts her eyes, "I don't see how that's relevant to me. He might be smarter, but I have Fagolan and the bombs of ultimate destruction."

"Is Fagolan really on your side? Isn't he once with Nillin as well?"

She doesn't answer me.

"If you hate all of this, go against it. Tell Nillin he is your father's son, that is going to hurt him more than you taking me away from him," I suggest. "Don't you agree with me?"

"No."

"Why not?" I continue to be calm.

"I'm going to make him suffer a hundred—no, ten thousand times more than I am right now," she glares at me. "When I defeat him, I'm going to rape you in front of him and Grandmama."

I lick my lips, "If you doubt he repented, then how can you trust that he loves me?"

"Who doesn't fall in love with you? You're handsomely beautiful and such a modest soul," her nose twitches. "You're an ideal."

"You couldn't be more wrong," I say. "He didn't start out liking me at all and there is a part of me that still believe Nillin is lying to me. But I will choose to believe him because when I put myself in his shoes, I don't see how I could've avoid his miscounts."

"Miscounts? Why don't you call them what they are, mistakes," Nien jerks her head. "And what is in his shoes? Where in the streets had he been that allows him to make those mistakes against you and I?"

I take in a deep breath.

"He is just a privileged brat. He always get the best of everything. He went to have fun on the streets and I get hammed by father's expectations."

"I don't know the whole truth, but Nillin told me he was left on the streets by Uncle Griflet when he was five and deprived of his title and possessions," I slowly explain. "He fell in loved with his ex-girlfriend, but Uncle Griflet cursed and killed her because he was out of Dawerilium metals and lost the King's favor."

"But they all told him his ex-girlfriend betrayed him and married a rich Lord. Nillin then reluctantly goes with Uncle Griflet until he married me," I feel a knot forming in my throat. "While his heart was still broken by the betrayal of his lover. Although he said he chose to marry me, I know it wasn't entirely his choice."

"Let me guess," Nien rolls her eyes. "Nillin found out his gal is inside his best friend, ignored all 'morality', and fucked his best friend's body."

I sigh reluctantly.

"He still did you wrong!" Nien holds my shoulders. "It shouldn't be an excuse for raping you and lying to you."

"I know," I hold in my turning stomach. "But I would've been a whore if it weren't for him, and I love him and our son so much."

"He doesn't deserve you."

"I know he's probably using me, but—"

"He IS using you," Nien corrects me. "Now I hate him even more. I'll fucking kill that bastard and marry you."

"No. That won't happen," I fortify my stance. "I'm already married to your brother. No matter his state, you are my sister-in-law and I can never marry you."

She laughs condescendingly, "Yeah. Sure. When I'm King, my words will be laws and they will happen."

Fiona calls for Nien before I point out her hypocrisy. How can she say Nillin is terrible for abusing my human rights when she plans to do the same?

When I return to Grandmama and the two children, her eyes won't greet mine.

"I think Asahi needs to be changed," she hands the baby to me. "It's my fault, Asahi's mom. If only I was strong enough to kill one of my twins."

"Oh no," I shake my head. "As a mother, I fully understand you even if others criticize you."

"And that child in your womb..." Grandmama covers her ears. "When will all of this end?"

I place a hand on her lap, "Have faith, Grandmama. Only Heaven knows the future, so let's not decide our doom."

She looks up at me with a glimmer in her eyes, "Decide our doom... I see, my grandson did not choose the skin but the heart."

"Grandmama," I chuckle and she laughs oldly.

The next morning when the rain is still heavy outside and many are still asleep, I am woken by Grandmama's moans.

(It's dark and barely enough dry dirt for everyone to sleep under.)

I reach over the children to tap on her shoulder, "Grandmama. Grandmama. Are you alright?"

Yet she doesn't answer me. I place the back of my hand against her burning forehead.

Nien, Fiona, and Claire are nowhere in sight, so I make the decision to carry Grandmama on my back, Asahi in my front, and hold Arabret's hand as we walk to town.

There is no point in leaving Asahi and Arabret behind because the women here don't like me for one reason or another. Children require a lot of attention, so they won't spare any for Asahi and Arabret.

Arabret's and my feet sink into the mud as we try our way into town.

"Asahi's mom," Arabret sleepily mumbles. "Where are we going?"

"Grandmama is sick and I can't find Claire, so we're going to find a doctor," I tell him.

"Won't Uncle Nien be mad at us?"

"Saving a life is sometime more important than breaking any rule," I answer him.

We walk in silent. I can feel my legs shaking from the weight. They are perhaps telling me that they'll give out on me any time now.

Luckily, the town is in sight and it's waking up.

I go over to a person and ask, "Do you know where the town's clinic or hospital is at?"

"Woah! You're so dark," the person decides to comment first. "Oh sorry, it's that building over there."

The person points to a tall wooden building with the sign 'General Hospital'.

"Thank you," I say and I rush to that building.

I open the doors and walk in to see Nien, Fiona, and Claire making a deal with a doctor I can only assume is the owner.