Humm? (jenlisa romcom gxg)

[39] Dec 24, 2022 - Saturday 15:44 [111]

| My Aunt's House

♪ [ ~ wish you were here - Alaina Castillo ~ ]

I'm alive... yes... who would have thought...? Not me... and apparently neither Rosé.

I turn off the car.

[Lisa: Rosé something happened..]

[Rosé: What?!]

I chuckle. She answered so fast.

[Lisa: I arrived at my aunt's house in one piece]

[Rosé: You scared me stupid!]

[Rosé: But wasn't it too fast?]

[Lisa: There wasn't much traffic]

[Rosé: You are forbidden to drive at high speed!]

I chuckle and get out of the car.

I breathe deeply and look at my aunt's house...

When... everything happened... my father had to sell our house to pay some medical expenses... so he ended up deciding to move out of the country after a few months, and since I was in my first year of university I stayed... and when I needed something I had his sister, my gomo... my aunt...

He seems happier there... and even though we don't talk much because he's just like me in terms of being... very social... believe me... when it's just the two of us talking... it's painfully awkward because no one says anything... and our silence... is indeed... awkward... so, it's pretty obvious when we try to fill the silence with quotidian stuff... we don't have much in common to talk about... and we also disagree on a lot of things... but I know he cares... and I care too... and he needed it to go... and I understand...

I go to knock on the door but the door starts to open itself.

"Hi, Miss Lisa, you can hand me your bags."

"Oh... hi Mr. Soo, thank you, but I can handle it."

"I insist, is my job."

"Mr. Soo, you don't need to." 

He chuckles.

"As you wish... don't tell Miss Han Sohee, but she missed you around the house and... I did too... you have to visit us more often."

I smile.

"I will..."

I see my aunt coming down the stairs, smiling at me. She's only seven years older than me, so our age gap isn't that big, but she likes to treat me like a kid either way... but before anything... an important thing I've learned over the years about her is... you can't take anything she says too seriously...

"Dressed like a boy... as always..."

I chuckle.

"Gomo... nice to see you too."

She chuckles.

"Your room is already prepared. When you're ready, come see me in the living room."

"Mhm."

...

I knock on the door and walk a bit inside. She is on the phone. 

She signals for me to sit on the sofa so I do it.

"Sorry... it was work..."

"Mhm."

She sits on the sofa too.

"... I'll have to go work tonight, but tomorrow it will be just you and me."

"Don't worry about it."

"I'd rather stay but... argh... we're planning to intercept a big operation... and nothing can go wrong that day... I can't even talk much more about it... anyway... what's new...? Have you... finally started dating someone?"

I chuckle.

She doesn't use she-her pronouns but doesn't use him-his either, so I appreciate it a lot.

"No..."

"Dressed like that... it must be really hard to find someone... don't look at me like that, I'm trying to help you, how I'm supposed to get rid of you?"

"I'm almost finishing my master's degree so if everything goes well maybe you will in a few months..."

"I don't care how far you'll work, don't you dare stop coming by when the university ends...!"

~ university ends ~

I chuckle and nod okay as I play with my ring...

"... Stop being always with that face, hon, you will get depression."

I chuckle.

"Ah-okay..."

"That ring you're looking at... did someone give it to you?" she smirks.

"Ah, it was just a Christmas present from a friend."

"Mhm... sure..."

...

I had dinner and went up to my room.

I'm already in bed looking at the ceiling.

I breathe deeply and bring my hand near to my face.

I chuckle.

I shouldn't be wearing this... but nobody knows... for others is just a ring... and I'm just the one being stupid, choosing to remember her as I wear it...

I roll it.

Why a sun tho...? I like it... but... I wonder why she chose this...

There was something I didn't notice the moment she gave it to me... 

I take off the ring and look at the letter J carved inside of it.

I breathe even more deeply.

It's Christmas Eve... so they are definitely together right now...

At least I'm not working like my aunt...

I'm really lucky to have her... not even a month later... after all that happened... I was so tired of everything... so hopeless... that I couldn't keep pretending... I knew I was being reckless, but I came out... the person I was most afraid to tell was no longer here and I felt like I didn't have much more to lose... what's really the worth of life if you're not living it... at least that's what I so recklessly thought... so I did it...

My aunt was the only member of my family who kept acknowledging my existence after I came out... which didn't surprise me... religion... beliefs... and what others think sometimes... weigh a lot... families... they are... complicated... you never actually can hate them if you know deep down they care... but to be honest... whatever... I know I can count on my aunt and that's more than enough for me...

It wasn't easy for her at the start, and obviously, there are still things that I feel like she will never stop trying to make me change... but over the years I feel like... she has grown to be more tolerable with me, I more patient with her, and... I love her a lot...