| Our House
♪ [ ~ This Little Story - New West ~ ]
I'm sitting in the bed... in a room decorated... by Jennie... and artistically freestyled by Mateo...
Jennie finishes reading the book and I look at Mateo hugging Leo as he sleeps...
Jennie and I both get up...
"Ma..."
Jennie already went out and didn't hear... I go back and bend my knees near him.
"You are still awake...?"
"Can I let the light on? I'm scared of the dark..."
"Mhm... you can..."
"... You know... I used to be scared of the dark too... I know it can be scary... you know what it used to help me...? Start to list the things that made me happy, the happiness of remembering them brights everything around... dark doesn't need to be scary... if it feels like home... and don't worry if it takes time to feel it like that... you will get there... I know you can... and until then, I'm here, mommy Jennie is here... you will never be alone... I love you, Maty..."
"Love you too, goodnight, ma..."
"Goodnight... I'll let the door open to let Leo go to the bathroom when he wants, okay?"
He nods, I get up... and see Jennie leaning on the door holding the book against her chest.
We both say goodnight and go out, starting to walk down the stairs.
I sit on the sofa, and Jennie lays with her head on the curve of my neck, wrapping herself around me.
And moves her head up suddenly.
"Babe... are you crying...?" she sounds concerned but joking with me at the same time.
"Ani..."
"Lisa..."
"It was the ant story you read..."
"It's a child's book."
"You have no heart. The ant found their way home..."
"Are you okay?"
"Ani... here, your bowl of strawberries," I hand her the bowl that was on the table.
She laughs and starts eating.
"I can't believe I ask. You. In marriage. That I'm going to marry you..." she laughs.
"You're still in time to not..."
"No... that's all I want to do... how many times do you intend to cry during our wedding?"
"Hm..." I press my lips...
"... Just a few..."
"Omo... you're gonna be a mess..." she laughs.
Her...
"... You already crying thinking about it."
"I'm not..."
"Did you already write your vows?"
"Don't pressure me... but, yeah... I wrote it... but I'm constantly changing it every day..."
"I already wrote them too-no...." she laughs.
"... Don't cry again, idiot."
"How many times you wrote idiot in those vows?"
She chuckles.
"You will have to wait and see..."
I nod... lean to her fork and steal her a strawberry, smirking at her.
"... L...?"
I breathe deeply...
"I'm scared... what?"
"I have an important thing to talk to you about..."
"Hmm... I sense divorce papers and we are not even married yet..."
"Do you want to... have more...?"
"Strawberries?"
"Ani..." she chuckles.
She looks nervously at me...
I look at her...
I knew it...
"More Mateos...?"
She chuckles.
"Mhm..." she looks attentievely at me.
I breathe deeply again and look at the ceiling.
One of the reasons why I never allowed myself to think that... I wanted to have kids myself... was... that I didn't trust life... if something would go wrong... it would feel like what I was told as a kid was true after all... that the universe was punishing me and others close to me because... because I was selfish to allow me to be... me... but now...
I look at Jennie again.
She seems nervous about my silence.
I smile.
But now... it's been a long time since I don't feel that weight on myself anymore... why would the universe be mad at me for being different... for loving differently... everyone is different in their own way...
Did someone fuck it up a little creating my lovely personality, I have no doubts, but... now I know that whatever happens next... I will not justify it with my irrational fear of being unworthy of happiness, 'cause... I already experienced happiness... and a big part of it was when this annoying girl was by my side...
I will try truly to be happy even though I'm aware of how life can be sometimes... I'm trusting you little shit... I will try my hardest but you better try too not fuck things up too. Please universe... help me make... my cats... my dogs if you have time, I'm joking, please the dogs too, my friends, Jennie, Mateo, and... the more mini Mateos that might come... help me make them as happy as I possibly can... because it was making them happy that I found myself the happiest...
"Us... and one... or more little mini Mateos around the house... with the Mateo himself, the cats, the dogs, and a hamster?"
"No hamster... I already have you..." she chuckles.
"... But, yeah..."
"Hmm..."
"You're killing me, Lisa...! Answer..."
"Would you break up with me if I said no?"
"Ani... you know that I obviously wouldn't..."
I chuckle at her sad face.
And pull her into a hug.
"... I want to start a family with you, Lisa..."
~ family ~
I would love to say I'm not this weak, but that word... there are already tears forming in my eyes again...
"... Even if it ends being just the three of us, three idiots together, there's no other family I rather be part of..."
She hugs me more... with watery eyes...
"With all you said... I forgot to say what my answer is, yes..."
"Jinjja?!" her surprised, happy and excited face...
"Ne... I would love to have more idiots with you..."
"Okay..." she smiles widely, between her sobs.
"Okay..."
Her tears fall on my cheek.
"Mianhae..." she wipes them with her hand.
I laugh and hug her tight...
YOU ARE READING
Humm? (jenlisa romcom gxg)
RomanceA nervous idiot falls for a criminal - a sad love story narrated from a goofy first-person Lisa POV. This romance extends beyond comedy and crime. It explores love, self-love, friendship, family, queerness, a young adult trying to survive life. 2...
