Turn It Up

Reality Setting In

Pam felt her heart sink into the pit of her stomach when Renee announced that the Draft was indeed, over. Pam looked down as the rest of the locker room was overjoyed at the selections. They did see the pain in Pam's face, the almost all saw that she was so sad..just so incredibly sad. After Fergal had to conduct an interview when he claimed that he should have been picked first, he smiled and the interview ended on a happy note. He looked back over at Pam who was indeed not happy whatsoever. More so of herself. She felt herself to be a failure, to be someone who knew where she wanted to be, but she just couldn't get there. The main roster was all that Pam dreamt of when she was a child, when she was young all that she thought about was making it. Even in school she did papers on it, projects, poems..everything to get there. And here was that golden ticket, she just didn't have it to punch right now. Fergal walked back over to her and grabbed both of her hands and held them in his gently, "Hey..you'll get there sweetheart..They can't go long without having you on there. The fans wouldn't allow it and you know it.." Fergal tried his best to get some reassurance into her mind so she would rest a little easier instead of being so depressed about her lack of selection. She sighed then beamed a fake, pain induced smile. "I love what you said Fergie. It was definitely cute as hell." She smiled a little more now as she saw he was buying into her fake happiness. Well it wasn't FULLY fake. She was so proud of her man, she just felt so much pain for her own failure that it was actually immeasurable. She saw her phone buzzing as if someone was calling her. And it turns out? Someone was calling her. She was getting a call from none other than Becky Lynch. SmackDown's first female choice. "Hello? This is the undrafted." Pam cracked a small joke in a hope that Rebecca would laugh, "Not funny..I'm sorry you didn't get picked sweet cheeks."

Pam didn't want pity, she didn't need to be apologized to or looked at any different than she was yesterday. "Don't worry about it Becks. I'm just gonna be here forever, y'know?" She laughed half heartedly and looked down as she spoke. Fergal was being hugged again by Lexi, who was literally crying she was so happy, he leaned back from the hug and smiled, "Look how far you've come Lex. Remember? The tutu? That was possibly the funniest thing I've seen, you hated that damn thing.." She laughed at him and the departed from the hug, "I remember, I remember not wanting to even be that goofy sparkle queen, princess, person thing. Goodness I'm so glad, and so freaking happy right now.." Matt was standing beside his woman, he was so proud of her and there was nothing that could take that away from him. She was just a bundle of emotion right now and Fergal was there with her in overjoyed land. "I can't believe I won't see you guys anymore down here. Crazy.." Matt didn't mean that to sound as sad as it did. But it totally came off as super duper sad. He looked down after he said it and Lexi looked over at him before strolling up to him gingerly. She lifted his chin up with her finger, "Hey..I'm still right here with you Matt. I'm not leaving you..Just NXT.." Matt smiled and Fergal glanced at Pam who was still on the phone, she was trying not to cry, he could see it in her face. She scrunched up her nose, her eyes glistened in the light and she was pacing around in circles. "Yea, you're right Becks. Just..Be happy right now, okay? Please? For me?" Pam wasn't concerned with her own happiness, just with making sure that her friends who were chosen were as happy as they could possibly be. "And you be patient, my young padawan. You time is comin' there ain't no stoppin' you!"

Rebecca. She was an interesting person. Here was a woman who had been through so many struggles and so much pain. There was something special inside of her that wouldn't let her be sad or dwell on things that were in the past. That was her key, if something bad happened to her? She remembered it until there was no need anymore. Depending on the situation, she could do that almost immediately, or she could do that in months time. Anywhere in between actually worked. For she had literally done it all, and coming from her? This meant quite a bit to Pam. "Thanks babe. I'll talk to you later." Pam hung up and leaned herself against the wall, head still hung very low. Her traditional side pony tail was instead just out, and her brown locks fell all in front of her face. Pam sat there and stewed in her sadness. She was boiling over with emotions..Some good, some bad. She was in shock that Leah was chosen over her. And that is just what this was, people being chosen over her. Leah even herself was admitting to not be ready for the big show, but here she was..drafted. Pam sniffled as she felt tears begin to slowly stream down her cheeks. She was both saddened and happy for her friends, and her man. It was an odd mixture of pain and just..happiness. Fergal saw this all go down, his happy little bundle of sunshine was turning into a gloomy dark cloud. She was slipping into sadness..He had to stop the avalanche before it overcame her and she lost sight of what was really important to her. He walked up to her and she didn't even bother looking up. Instead? He dropped to both knees and placed his hands around her knees, wrapping around them gently. "Hey..Pamela..Baby.." His voice cause her to cry more, just how soothing and gentle he was made her heart skip a beat yet again. Just as she thought she was doing okay, she breathed in and her crying became more apparent to Fergal. "Oh no..No no no." He leaned in and pressed the side of his head against her legs, Pam rested her hands on top of his head, dragging the tips of her fingers through his hair and she continued to quietly weep. "Don't cry, angel..please don't cry.."

Pam didn't even really know what to say, she didn't know whether to just dismiss her sorrow, for it wasn't jealousy why she was so upset, she in no way was even close to being a jealous person. She just felt like such a failure in regards to her lack of being selected. That was more painful than jealousy would have been. She just felt the pain seep into her gentle little fragile heart, there was not a lot that could make her feel better right now..even coming from Fergal which was incredible. "I'm fine..I'm so proud of you.." Fergal stayed down on his knees as she spoke to him. He didn't care how ridiculous he looked, this was Pam. This was the woman he loved and he'd be damned before he'd let people's opinions change how he treated her. He slowly got up and his hands rode up her thighs and rested on her hips momentarily. Just for a small second before he lifted them and placed them on her cheeks. "I got all of this since I got here because of you..You don't understand how much of a motivational person you are..Before we started seeing each other? I admired what you did..Where you came from. How much time you spent perfectin' all of this and never losing sight of who you really are inside. Damn it Pam, you are actually perfect.." His words were so sweet and kind, he was really just a gentle human being at heart, he just wanted to see her being all happy and bubbly again, and she knew that. But the feeling of being..a failure like this was something that she was having such a hard damn time getting over. "Just..just kiss me, please." She pleaded with him, and to be honest? Why the hell did she even have to ask? Fergal smiled, "Of course, of course.." He leaned in and kissed her..Holding it for quite a while, his thumbs gently caressed her cheeks as time seemed to stop.

She luckily felt herself calm down a little and just wanted to go home. She just wanted to spend this last night with Fergal and enjoy it. For now? She knew that he was going to be on the road..without her. That was a thought she would have to address at a later date. Right now she just had to get out of that Performance Center. "Can we go back to your place? I just don't wanna be here anymore.." Pam's little voice broke as she spoke, further amplifying how truly upset she was right now. Say no more, he thought to himself, instead of speaking he just nodded and grabbed her hand gently, "We gotta say goodbye to everyone though, you know that lass." Pam knew he was right, they did deserve a goodbye and a hug, perhaps even a congrats from her yet again. She did already do it however but hey, at a time like this? There is no such thing as too much praise. They both approached the group yet again and Pam was the first to speak, she didn't want Fergal taking all the heat for this. "Hey, guys? I gotta get outta here. I need to sleep..Been sleeping like poopy lately and I gotta catch up on that." Lexi heard this and got a little sadder, the tiny blonde woman hung her head low for a moment and then looked up, "Okay sweets. You do look a little sleepy.." She opened her arms after she spoke and Pam lurched forward and embraced the little woman. The hug is what both of them sorely needed. Pam more so, but Lexi would miss her friend so badly it was going to be such a struggle. Now she would be on a show where she didn't really have all that many friends. Not close ones of not at least..Just co-workers. "I'm gonna miss you so much Lexi." Pam nuzzled her head into the crook of Lexi's neck and at that exact moment, Lexi felt some tears build up in her eyes. She closed her eyes tight and took a shaky breath in, "I'm gonna miss you too..Goodness..Don't make me cry, you ass.." They both laughed quietly and pulled away from the hug. Both women were teary eyed and deflated just a little bit, the realization that they would no longer be working with each other constantly just sank in.

"Aye, Matt. Lad, just keep doin' you. You'll get there. Got all the faith in you, brother." Fergal was being the big brother to Matt right now, he did enjoy working with him and he definitely thought that Matt was a shoe in to be taken in this draft. "It isn't a biggie mate, I'll get there, Congrats though, you deserve this way too much." They both laughed a bit and watched as their women got super emotional, Fergal whispered, "What if we got emotional like that, think they'd laugh at us?" They both laughed quietly again, "Nah bad idea, Lex would get pissy with us and we'd get her all Blissed off and such." Fergal shrugged and nodded, "You've got a good point..I value my future. No need to get her in that mood." As she heard Bliss, Lexi looked up, "What'cha talkin' bout over here? Could it be SmackDown Live's future? Alexa Bliss? Sounds like it is. Remember, I'm the future, cupcake." She pulled a small promo on the two of them and they both collectively were impressed with her improvising like that. Fergal gave a silly round of applause for her and smiled as Pam watched on. She knew this was going to be the absolute hardest thing in her life to date. The Iron-Woman match was one thing, but not being with the love of her life daily? That was a test that she was petrified to take. What if Fergal got sick of not seeing her? What if he found someone else on the road..What if he was like, in the locker room and just was approached and..accepted? These thoughts would turn Pam's hair gray. She had to figure out how to erase the fear from her mind and get back to focusing on just how blessed she was to even be working for WWE. An opportunity? That'll come eventually..only thing to do now is just wait for her spot..