Turn It Up

Recovery

Pam was a sobbing mess. She had no idea what was going on right now. Just moments ago she was in her bathroom..Pills in hand and she was downing them like they were going out of style. And now? She was being firmly held in her lover's arms..What the hell even right now. Was she going insane? All at once she felt a gentle touch brush her forehead, "My god..Pamela you have a fever..You're literally burning up..Let me get some aspirin. Pam shook and nodded as Fergal limped gingerly to the bathroom. She felt awful right now, just awful. She kept her eyes shut as she listened to him rustle around her apartment in rapid fashion. After a few minutes, she was wobbling up around, her head felt like it was entirely under water and she had no bearing of where the hell she actually was. She felt a hand touch her on her exposed hip gently holding her in place. "Take this..Please Pam. Can't have you dyin' on me.." Fergal was so concerned right now, fear gripped his face as he couldn't help himself but feel..weak; helpless even to make sure that she was in fact okay. Pam weakley took the aspirin and swigged it down her throat in a swift motion. She panted quietly after they went down, Fergal was gently rubbing up and down her side, just trying to make sure that she knew he was there for her. That she wasn't in this personal hell all on her own. "And when you can? You're tellin' me what the hell you dreamt about..Got it, lass?" Fergal lifted her chin up so she was facing him, she peeled her little brown eyes open and a mixed look of pain and fear took over. "Yes sir." He smiled, and she smiled a little too, with a quick lean in, Fergal snagged a kiss from her and he adjusted himself onto the bed next to her. Pam curled up against him like a little kid and her teddy bear. Her leg swung over his lower body and Fergal's arm wrapped carefully around the fragile being. Perhaps she just needed to be held, maybe that's what had her mind in a tizzy..But where the hell did she get any kind of thought that Fergal and Rebecca were ever an item..That they had history..? Sexual history together? No..there couldn't be any truth to that at all. If anyone else; Rebecca would have mentioned it to him a long time ago. And Matt? Why the hell would she even put it in her own head that she slept with him when CLEARLY they were hardly friends? Who knows at this point, she was most certainly not the person for the job.

After three and a half peaceful, quiet hours. Pam awoke from her gentle slumber. Fergal was still sleeping right where she remembered he would be. And in typical Pam fashion, she got up to use the bathroom, and on her way she slipped on a flip-flop she had on her floor and damn near busted her ass. The commotion caused Fergal to awaken and look right over at her. Pam blushed lightly and her whisper was extremely raspy, "S-sorry Fergie.." He smiled a bit and scooted down the bed a tad, "That's alright love..Hurry back though, I miss your warmth..God that was lame. I need to stop talkin'.." She giggled and blushed more, that was ridiculously cute of him to say, maybe it was sleepy talk. But she knew better, she knew that Fergal was in fact a little heartthrob in his own right. Too bad his heart was in her hands and she was not sharing it with anyone. After she returned to bed, she re-curled up in his arms as he laid there, half awake. "So..You gonna tell me what had you screamin' up here? Cause I know damn sure that it wasn't a dream about happy pretty bunnies and unicorns.." Fergal had a way of prying information out of people, he chose the approach of making issues not sound as severe as they perhaps really were. It worked quite well for him thus far, and it was about to work for him again, but this time on Pam.

In some odd way, Pam was hoping that he would have forgotten about the whole issue. She was hoping that there was some way that she could slide out of that problem and forget that it ever happened. In reality, there was no way in hell that he was going to let her get away with not explaining why he thought she was being murdered. She thought about it a moment, the dream was so...vivid. And accurate. Although, some things in her apartment were different from the dream to reality, but thinking about it again, it was damn near spot on accurate. She exhaled deeply and tried to calm her own nerves just to muster up the strength to even talk about it. After a moment however, she spoke. "W-well..Uh.." Fergal placed his hand over top of her tummy and rubbed gentle little hearts and circles onto it. She immediately felt her heartbeat slow down to a more stable pace, "What..Take your time sweetheart..I ain't goin' anywhere anytime soon.." Fergal's words was like music to her ears, it was all she needed to know that he was indeed not going to just abandon her at a time like this. "Well..We for some..some reason had a huge fight..And like, you broke stuff..And we kept screaming..and screaming at each other..L-like we hated each other almost..and.." She paused to look up at him, Fergal not only had a hurt look on his face, but also one filled with confusion. "I really don't have to..You don't want to.." Pam tried to plead her case before she got to the part that she really wished she had genuinely forgotten. But before she got there; Fergal interrupted quietly, "Please go on, Pam..I'm fine. I just have so many wonders..Y'know?" After he spoke, she nodded in agreement and understanding. She had to know that this was something that he was not going to judge her over, that he was not going to freak out and just leave..Like so many others..Pam's past relationships before Fergal can simply be described as looking at a lawn, a nice cut lawn. Look at all the blades of grass. And how they all blow in the wind..All the same. None ever stood out until Fergal came prancing into her life, straight out of her fantasies, here he was. And he was hers. "We like, argued over..Apparently you having been with Rebecca in the past..And like, I was apparently with Matt to spite you? Like dude, I don't..I.." Fergal now was in complete confused guy land. He was baffled as to why she would think this and then it dawned on him.

"Is that cause me and Becks are really close?" Fergal had never, EVER been with Rebecca. She was practically a sister to him in many ways. He took care of her when no one else would give her the time of day. Even the thought of him..being with her..God he felt a skin crawling disgust type sensation overflow his flesh. "Well..Yea I mean, like, you haven't ever..Right?" She had to have confirmation that he in fact had never been with her. Without even hesitating, "Hell no. Pam, Becks is like my little sister. I've seen that girl grow up from a dorky little kid with a dream, to a strong woman who is the dream." Fergal was publicly proud of how far Rebecca had come, and to know without him, she might not even be there. Period. "Now what's this with you and Matt? Is that..A repressed memory..? A..fantasy? I don't know." That actually caused the sickly woman to laugh, and laugh loudly. Well..It did precede a loud and violent cough. "Easy sweetie.." Fergal was looking after her so well right now it was absolutely incredible of him. She, again, was not used to something like this. She wasn't used to being pampered like this as it was not the motive of her ex's. She breathed deeply after she got her lungs back calmed slightly, "To quote a handsome Irish fellow..Hell NO!." They both let out equally as quiet and silly giggles followed by a gentle pull of her body closer to his. "Well go on now Pam, there's gotta be more to it than just a little fear like that now.."

Damn it why did he always have to be right. He could read her like a book right now. This was a skill obtained when Fergal was in Japan, and he wasn't familiar with anyone or anything. He could assess an issue, or figure out a person's true motives without even opening his mouth in conversation. And now was a great time to utilize that skill in the most appropriate way imaginable. "Well..After you..yelled at me about Matt..You left..You said you were done, and that you never wanted me basically in your life ever again..And dude, you meant like, forever forever. Not five minutes from now come back to me forever. Not a week, or whatever..Just done.." She needed a minute. Feeling tears build right back up in her tender, sore little eyes. "Hey..If it's too much to say..I-" "And then I had gone into the bathroom..A-and..I opened my medicine cabinet.." Fergal had a sinking, dark feeling brewing inside of him. He knew exactly where this dream was headed, he knew just how far this was going to end up. "I grabbed like..three bottles of different ones..My prescriptions for my knee pains..Popped about twelve or so into my mouth..Took a big swig of water.." She paused again, this time looking right back up into Fergal's doey brown eyes. She needed to see his face when she uttered the last, crucial part of this dream..She needed to see just..Just something from this. For she knew how she would react if he came to her with a nightmare like this. It was almost a mini test, if you will. "And then I swallowed them..All.." Fergal was floored. How could this intense of a dream come out of literally nowhere. They hadn't fought, ever. At all, in the ring is different, that is work stuff, not serious, life threatening stuff. He took a few moments to just gather himself, pain shot all over his face from his ankle, but sorrow was the only showing emotion that could be identified. He then closed his eyes, "Jesus Pam.." He had no idea that thoughts like that even flowed through that innocent woman's mind like that. He didn't know what she was capable of and now he was quite terrified of just the thought of her being alone. "Crazy stuff, right?" Pam didn't know what else to say at this point. She was still trying to figure out why she had the dream in the first place.

"So lemme get this straight..We have a violent argument..Over things that happened or whatever..And then I leave. And you try to-" "Yep..Just like that exactly. Barring some colorful language inserted in the middle there..But you get the picture. Why the heck did I even have a dream like that?" Fergal shook his head back and forth, "I don't honestly know. It sounds like you were having an insane fever dream. Ever hear of them? It is..Basically when you're wicked sick, and obviously have a crazy high fever. Sometimes your mind can play things out that never..ever happened. And mind you NEVER will happen. But it looks like this..this was yours. Just a really, really nasty fever dream." Pam listened to his words and immediately felt relieved at this new information. She honestly had never heard of a fever dream or any kind of dream resulting from severe illness. "Thank god..Honestly I thought I was going insane. Like, then you burst into my room all heroic and stuff like, like what if I was totally naked or something? Wouldn't you be a bit embarrassed? I know I would." Fergal and Pam both exchanged giggles, typical Pam fashion. Always being the silly one of the bunch. "If it meant savin' your life? Darlin' I wouldn't care if you were smothered in pudding and whipped cream, I'm comin' to save you." That was oddly the cutest thing anyone has ever said to her. Fever dream..That is one way to put the fear of god into a person. "Thank you for being oh so perfect, Mister Devitt." She leaned over and kissed his forearm gently and slowly. "Anything for you, Miss Martinez."