Turn It Up

The Demon Explodes

Fergal was.. Confused. Confusion was something that was going to be felt until he was explained what is going on. The last he saw of these two they hated each other, or at least Pam had a monstrous grudge on Mercedes.. Now they are hugging and all seems well? After literal minutes of them latched onto each other, they finally broke the hug and both looked at Fergal with teary eyes. "You look so confused.." Mercedes finally broke the silence. Well, no shit sherlock. Fergal nodded slowly and raised his eyebrows, "You could say that." They both entered his apartment and shut the door behind them. Fergal had so many mixed emotions right now, he didn't know if Pam randomly came her or not.. But he wasn't really ready to see her again. People don't understand that feeling of you just want space. You just want to be alone. And you're being forced practically to see the LITERAL one person you didn't want to see. But, Fergal had guts. And guts was enough for now. They both sat down near each other, Fergal chose to sit away from them. "I called her before I came here. I thought it was time to fix what I broke." Mercedes informed Fergal that she was the one who called Pam to come over.. That was rather ambitious, and kind of put Fergal in a bad mood of sorts.. All the positivity Fergal had for Mercedes was destroyed when she called Pam over. He nodded though, keeping his frustrated feelings bottled up inside of himself. "Oh okay, yeah I was just wondering what on earth was going on here." Pam looked at him, trying to get a read on him. But it has been quite a long journey for Fergal, and his face, that poker face that he developed.. It was iron. There was no seeing passed it.. "Yeah I got the call from 'Cedes and we really weren't on bad terms anyways. But this little clique was kind of breaking apart at the stitches.. So I wanted to fix it. This was my idea." Pam added to this lovely little conversation. Honestly they were both just digging themselves deeper into a little hole that Fergal was not going to help them out of. He nodded, "Yeah yeah. That totally makes sense. I understand. So how does this work, is this like some sort of intervention? Therapy even? How does something like this work." Fergal's attitude was front and center, and it was almost blatant that he didn't want to do this. Not now, not ever. Group talking was not his strong suit when it came to THIS. In the ring? Fine. Press conference? Fine. Signings? Fine. But here.. With the one person in the world who has caused more problems for him, and the other who exasperated those problems and created her own as a result? This was entirely not okay. And all Fergal wanted to do was tell them that fact..

    There was so much awkward tension between the three of them. Well, mainly the two girls against Fergal. He was giving them a vibe, a vibe that screamed this was a bad idea. Fergal was hoping and praying that he would get a text or something to that effect that he would have to go to work, or a friend needed a ride home or something. He had an idea.. Of sorts. It popped into his head rather quickly, so there was no risk of ignoring Pam or Mercedes' words. He grabbed his phone and went to his messages, he texted April and said, 'I need you to text me and tell me you need a ride home. Or to a hotel. Please help me out I'll explain when I get there. I'm also deleting the thread. Just. Text me you need a ride to the hotel or arena or something. Thank you in advance.' He put his phone down and looked at them, "Sorry, I had an email I needed to answer." Then set his phone down next to him, hoping that April would help him out. "Okay so, I guess I'll start. Seeming how I've caused the most problems with us.."

    Mercedes was right, in Fergal's eyes, and surely Pam's eyes she was indeed the problem with their friendship. She caught feelings for Fergal late and made so many things complicated and it really stirred a shit storm up that just sucked Fergal and Pam both into it. It was so sad to think that in such a short time, Mercedes was damn near the reason why Fergal and Pam no longer dated. The unbreakable couple was broken and why? Why did they break? Well Pam seemed to appear as if she didn't realize the extent of the damage inflicted. And when it was Fergal's turn to talk he would surely explain to them otherwise. "I shouldn't have said anything to Fergal that day. I was so out of line and I expect so much more out of myself.. I was weak, and frail. I was scared that if I didn't tell him then, that I would never get a chance to tell him ever. I don't know why I had to tell him, but I just did. Think of it like a weight off of my shoulders. But how it went down? All I did was put another weight, a heavier one, right back on my shoulders.. And for that? For ruining this little buddy system? I'm so sorry to both of you.." To her defense, she was being as sincere as humanly possible. Fergal nodded in acceptance of her apology, but did not speak. The more this little group therapy session drug on, the more frustrated he became. He had to constantly tell himself to not speak, to not say the words that darted through his head like a formula one car. Mercedes began to tear up, she cried over everything in the whole world so this really was no shock to anyone. Pam softly rubbed her back and it was Pam's turn to speak now. They had a little talking pillow system, Mercedes held onto the pillow and she was the one who was allowed to speak, per the talking pillow being in her lap. She handed it to Pam and it was now Pam's turn to talk. Fergal grew increasingly irritated at this little dumbass sixth grade system of being orderly.. It was just annoying to him. "Ever since I met you Fergal you've made my life better. I'm the one who has made it worse. Sure there are things you do wrong, and you can be a tiny bit insensitive and stubborn. But I'm the one who creates these issues with Lexi, Mercedes, AJ even. I do this. Me. You are just having friends, I have guy friends and you don't really care about that. But seeing those girls and then comparing them to me I just can't even. Look at them, really look. They're perfect from head to toe. No flaws, perfect hair, face, body. What am I? I have the face of a ten year old and the body of someone who just. Works out. I'm kind of thicker in comparison and I don't even know if you like that kind of thing.. Morale of the story here? I'm sorry to both of you for being stupidly insecure.."

    Fergal nodded again, holding his words in and practically literally biting his tongue. Pam's words were true indeed. She was insecure but it was no reason to apologize to him over. You cannot help that kind of feeling, it just is THERE. Like a disease. It won't go away with kind words, reassurance, love even. So for Pam to take full blame for something she had virtually no control over was just unfair. But Fergal nodded along, not wanting to say how he really felt because in all honesty he disagreed with at least one to two things that both of them have said so far. "So that's how we feel.. And honestly I'm really happy you didn't need an explanation on the talking pillow. Thank you Fergal." Pam spoke to him and he nodded again, his irritation had to be boiling over like a teapot right now. But nevertheless, he didn't say anything. It was not his turn to speak yet. After the pillow was extended his way, Fergal reached only a little bit and grabbed it, putting it in his lap and tapping his fingers on top of it, whilst he gathered his thoughts, preparing to somehow word this so that he doesn't piss anyone off. But who cares..

    "Okay. So let's start here. One. I don't hate either of you. Even after Mercedes, you tried to basically get me into bed with you WHILE I was engaged. I understood where you came from and as a matter of fact; Pam is the one who condemned you. And two. I never said that being insecure about your body is an offense only forgiven by an apology. Never. I always have been supportive when you get down about your weight, 'sex appeal', your face, hair, eyes, EVERYTHING. So as much as I would normally accept an apology. I'm not. I'm not because I refuse to recognize being insecure as something you did wrong. Now I can get started. I still can't understand however why you needed to tell me how you felt, Mercedes. I mean for gods sake, you SAW me propose to Pamela at Wrestlemania. The whole goddamn WORLD saw me propose to her. And soon after, oh mind you after Lexi, Shinsuke, Becks, AND Pam were almost basically killed.. THAT'S the right time to tell me you secretly have loved me for years? It is relieving to know you got something off of your chest. But when should you have told me? Oh I don't know. YEARS AGO. A big reason why this bothers me so much is guess how many fights me and Pam got into because I DEFENDED you from her. She ALWAYS said you had malicious intent with me and wanted me for yourself, to take me from Pam. I always, always always said no, Mercedes isn't that kind of girl. I was in a losing battle that I had no idea I was losing for almost two years. So telling me this after all of that? Yeah I kind of don't understand the comedic timing. And Pam? For what you did after Mercedes'.. 'Accident.' How can I ever really get over that. I won't even use the term forgive, because I'm tired of being so forgiving to those who really wronged me. I'm always just Fergal, the big dumb bastard who can get kicked in the balls and thank the person who did it. No. Not anymore.. I can't even begin to explain the psychological damage that caused me. The amount of stress and well. I don't know if you noticed but we kind of are separated as a result of what happened that day. AND NO. I didn't basically explain how I really felt. Sure, I had opportunities. Leah, Rami, I think even April tried to get in touch and get my feelings out. But I gave everyone nothing. Vague bullshit responses about how I felt. But this little shit show therapy session is all about getting the gunk out of our collective system? Cool. Because after eating shit for so long I think I'm a little gunky. I have almost destroyed friendships based on lies, I have cut people out based on what YOU need. And guess what? I didn't say SHIT. I didn't protest that whatsoever. But hey.. Therapy helps.."

    Fergal's speech came out of nowhere and it left Pam and Mercedes collectively stunned. They had no idea what to say and they also really had no idea what they had done to Fergal up until this point. The feeling that was inside them both went from understanding and patience, to regret and disappointment. Sadness. Anger at themselves. You name it, they felt it. Fergal's breathing was shaky, he was not like this and it took many screw jobs in order for his feelings to get this damaged and get this strained. Fergal squeezed that pillow so tight if it was a bottle of water, the cap would have burst off of it. Fergal's phone buzzed twice, indicating a text message. He grabbed it and read the message. It was about an hour until he had to be at work anyways.. "I have to go. AJ needs a ride to work and she's twenty minutes away from here. Stick around if you guys want. Or go. I don't care. Just lock the handle on the door on your way out." Fergal stood up and grabbed his car keys, tossing the pillow in between them both. Both Mercedes and Pam's gaze were fixated in front of them.. The door closed behind Fergal rather loudly, and just like that, he was gone..