Kabhi to nazar milao

Face to face

Naina was too dazed to register when Sonali helped her to reach her hostel room, when she informed the warden about her health and requested her to get meals sent to the room as an exception, when the lights of the day faded and darkness engulfed the room... she mechanically went about doing chores, eating her meals and then lying down on the bed, trying to sleep.

But sleep was faraway from her eyes.

However hard she tried,  she could not conjure an image of Naina Agarwal being carried in Sameer Maheshwari's arms.

If only she could get a fraction of recollection...

Did Sameer recognise her? This question was gnawing her senses ever since she came to know what had happened.

"What is there to recognise,  Naina?" she reprimanded herself, "He never gave you a single glance in school... when he paid no attention to Kamya, the most beautiful and stylish girl of our school, how can you even think that he would notice you... neither then nor now. He did whatever he did only to help a fellow student... had it been any other girl, he would have done the same."

Naina grimaced at her own words. Just the thought of him picking up some other girl in his arms brought a sharp pain to her heart.

Oh God!  She needed Preeti and Swati.  The only people who knew about her feelings for Sameer. She badly wanted them here... to share with them, cry with them, listen to their teasing tone in knowing that Sameer had actually picked her up in his arms... whatever the circumstances, and also to ease her frustration at not remembering anything at all. Her two lifelines could have eased her pain... or, at least, understood it.  They would have consoled her. They would have let her cry on their shoulder. The thought broke her again and the tears came rushing back.

Naina did not remember the next morning when she had fallen asleep but the pillow still had wetness of her tears.

She could not gather enough courage to attend the college today so she decided to stay in her room. However, she did not skip any meal, knowing fully well that her family would be informed if she fell sick or fainted again. She didn't want taiji to get any excuse to call her back.

Sonali came to check on her in between the classes. She was happy to see her friend looking better than yesterday, though the emptiness in her eyes made her wonder if there was some family problem.

"Naina, ab jaldi se theek ho ja... freshers ka time nazdeek aa raha hai... aise party mein aayegi kya?" She tried to cheer up her friend.

"Maine bataya tha na... party mein aane ki permission nahi milegi." Naina said in a disheartened voice.

"Aur maine bhi kaha tha ki permission mangna hi mat... college mein hi to hai party... bas ready ho aur aaja." She was determined to not let Naina get away.

"Aur agar usi din ghar se phone aa gaya toh? Pata hai kitni daant padegi... kahin wapas bula liya toh ho gayi meri padhai." Naina knew the dynamics of her family.

"To jhooth bol dena ki debate competition tha college mein... pehle kabhi jhooth nahi bola kya apne gharwalon se?"

Naina looked at Sonali in wonder, her thoughts drifting back to a school day.

******

It was the initial month of class XII. Naina was walking towards the water cooler during a break when Munna and Pandit came running to her, panting for breath.

"Naina, Naina... ruk do minute." She glared at them.

Boys did not call out her name at this pitch in the corridor. And she hardly ever spoke to them. What was this sudden rush?