𝑷𝒐𝒊𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒐𝒖𝒔 𝑲𝒊𝒏𝒅 / OT7 x Reader

- XIV -

Y/N's POV

Applauses everywhere inside the small camerino. The performance was beyond spectacular, I felt the real adrenaline artists feel when stepping on an scenario. That's what I am now, an artist.

Eventhough I just made some chorus, my dance steps where great, the whole choreo was made to make me look like the main character of the song. Now we just need to wait for more instructions about the promotionals and I'm done for today.

"Everybody is talking about you! That's the impact I was talking about! Can you see? We are walking to fame!" Our PD is more than exited, he said this is what he expected to be done.

All of them continue cheering the following success and the Bangtan boys are getting together for an hug, I'm feeling out of my zone, not until a pair of arms hold me tight making me end up in the center of the hug. I lift my head and see Jungkook's doe eyes shining while he whispers 'we did it!' And a big bunny smile forms in his baby face, I decided to return the hug, this is the most loving thing I have ever felt since I left London.

Jungkook's embrace feels warm and safe, but he is too thin so my hands almost touch my own waist, which looks bigger than his. Am I that fat?

The hug ends and for the first time everyone is smiling.

"Let's go home! You have the day off but tomorrow morning we'll continue practicing, we still have ten more shows." The manager gives us a break for today so now I'm free, but the idea of not being as skinny as Jungkook or as  the girls that performed after us is still in my head, maybe some workout will help.

Back in our shared apartment they all look happy still. Suddenly my eyes land on certain boy who's sitting in a corner, with a phone in his hands while reading with a worried expression on his small eyes. Is it something about him? Or about me?

"Let's prepare meal together and then everyone is free!" Jin is gathering the attention so we can help him cook. I barely know a thing or two about korean food, so  I always try to be glued to chef Jin so I can learn something, and since he never looked uncomfortable with my presence or with my questions about cooking, I stay with him and learn the most I can.

Because of that, I run to his left so he gets the idea of me helping him.

"We are preparing Tteokbokki. You know Tteokbokki?" He always does that, he likes to play with his english and that makes me think he doesn't hate me at all.

We are battling in the kitchen and one by one the rest of the boys offer help so the food is ready in less time. When the food is ready we all reunite around the short oval table, I'm between Jin and Jimin, Taehyung in front of me.

"Thanks for the meal, Jin hyung~" Everybody show their gratitude, because apparently that's how they do.
"Y/N helped too, say thanks to her~"
"Thanks Y/N~" And my heart flipped for a second, that's the kind of the ephemeral interactions we have, maybe one day we could be friends. I shyly bow with a little smile.

"Hyung~ Have you read what fans think of the presentation?"
"Taehyung, what have I told you about reading comments?"
V speaks like if he wanted to start a discussion and Namjoon tries to stop him.
"They are speaking about Y/N-ssi~" He's provocative again.
"They say I looked fat~" Jimin changes the reflectors to him and I'm thankful, but again V needs to speak.
"They said you are chubby not fat, Jiminie~... But about Y/N-"
"We don't want to know! Jiminie you're not fat! Stop it Taehyung..."
Looks like Leader Namjoon has enough of V's provocations so he interrupted the young boy, tho, I feel like reading what they are saying about me.

We had to finish our food quietly and I decided to wash the dishes just because I feel like I need to look useful rather than a hindrance, and the rest of the boys are not really bothered with me cleaning the mess, so I'm alone in the small kitchen trying to get everything done.

When I finished, the kitchen look like a picture, the table empty, dishes dry and save in the shelf, floor already sweep.

I turn on my phone and look for the video of our early performance. We looked really good. Now scrolling down to the comments section and I see some of those comments Jimin talked about.

Isn't Jimin looking a bit fat?

Jimin's cheeks grew since last performance

Last time we saw Jimin, he looked thinner, he gained some pounds

Some comments carry love, but others look like they just want to destroy their idol's confidence. Then I arrived to those comments about me.

Is she a permanent dancer? She's not needed, take her out of there

She's not Korean, right?

She looks really overweight

Wow... They say I'm not needed but I'm actually part of the group... damn.

I was looking at nothing specific trying to figure out if I would be really accepted in this Fandom when a voice surprises me.

"Did you read it? Of course you did"
Jimin sits on the floor beside me. "They keep on saying I look fat since the last performance before, that's why I'm on a diet"

"Eating once a day is not a diet, Jimim-ssi"
"Well, I'm trying my best to pleased them... What do they say about you?"
"Me being a not-needed background dancer, me being not-korean and me being overweight" I make a pause before continuing... Maybe I should try his kind of diet.
"You better wait for the comments you'll receive when your entrance to the band finally makes official"
"Do you think it would be worse?"
"Maybe... But this is your dream, right?"
"Yes"
"Then you should keep on working hard and smiling to the cameras no matter what"

I've never expected this to be easy, but I've never thought fans weren't always supportive.

He stands up when we hear a door opening.

"You should sleep now, we have practice tomorrow"

I nod silently, still thinking about his previous words

"Good night, bandmate"
"Good night, Jimim-ssi"

I walked to my room but couldn't sleep, I don't really think they'll like me, I really need to work harder.

Lying on my bed, looking at the wall to my right side, I standed planning my strategy to be loved by the boys, and by the fans and the musical industry in general. That includes working on my appearance, my singing kills and the way I get along with the bandmates.

And being 5 in the morning, I jump out of bed to be ready for another practice day and a later in the afternoon performance.