𝚁𝚘𝚕𝚕 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝙳𝚒𝚌𝚎| 𝓔𝓭𝓭𝓲𝓮 𝓗𝓮𝓪𝓭𝓬𝓪𝓷𝓸𝓷𝓼/ 𝓘𝓶𝓪𝓰𝓲𝓷𝓮𝓼

Appetite

AN/TW: This imagine features a reader who is recovering from an eating disorder.
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"I'm starving." Eddie mumbles at the table as he begins to unpack his food, I force a smile and nod as he already takes a huge bite of his sandwich, I sip on my water, forcing myself to nibble on some salad just so it looks like I'm doing something, I've found before if you just completely miss out then people question you.

Eddie glances at me but doesn't say anything for a few minutes, when he keeps looking I finally snap. "What?"

Eddie's eyes widen as if I've hurt him, but he brushes it off and shrugs up a shoulder. "Just thinking that the salad doesn't look like much, want me to buy you something else?"

My heart drops at his kindness, as if on que my stomach growls, but I shake my head and pack up my things. "No thanks, trust me I'm full." I lie.

It's like this for the next few weeks, I can feel myself spiralling again as my lunches reduce in size, and Eddie pesters me about buying me something or even cooking something to bring in. I think he knows somethings up, but he doesn't know how to help.

One lunch I sit sipping my water when Eddie for once doesn't get his food out, instead he stands up and holds out a hand for me. I raise my brows but follow him since I trust him. Eddie leads me out of school and into the parking lot towards his van.

"What are we doing?" I ask curiously, getting in after Eddie impatiently beckons me to.

"We're going to get lunch, anything you want, or I can take you back to mine and we can cook together." He mumbles starting the van up.

Anger courses through me, how dare he try to force this on me? "No." I say, grabbing the door handle, Eddie hits the brakes as he reverses and sighs, leaning his head against the steering wheel.

"I'm only trying to help, I don't know what else to do." He whispers, and I notice he's on the verge of tears. Have I really spiralled again, shit, maybe it's worse than I thought.

"I'm sorry Eddie, I don't know what's wrong with me." I mumble, tears filling my own eyes.

Eddie's eyes dart to mine as he sits up straight, grabbing my hand he leans closer to me, his eyes never leaving mine as he confidently says "There's not a single fucking thing wrong with you. You're perfect the way you are, but you can't keep hurting yourself like this."

His words hit deep, he's right though, sometimes I get stomach ache from how hungry I am, the headaches have worsened and some of my clothes feel to big.

"I know, I just...I find it hard to eat, like I'm worried what will happen if I have too much, or eat the wrong thing and-"

Eddie cups my cheek as my breathing quickens, his thumbs caress my cheekbone as I focus on not having a panic attack.

"Unless you choke on your food, it's not gonna hurt you. You're allowed to eat what you want to, it's your life and you deserve to do what you want."

I nod as Eddie sighs, dropping his hand as he continues driving out of the parking lot. "Can we maybe get some sandwiches? The nice ones from the store, not some shitty school ones." I ask shyly, my mouth watering at the thought of my favourite filling.

Eddie nods and we head to the store, Eddie insists on paying and we head back to his van, sitting inside as Black Sabbath plays from the radio.

"Here, let me." Eddie murmurs, opening the packet for me as I stare at it, maybe this was a bad idea. As if sensing my hesitation, Eddie puts a finger under my chin and gives me an encouraging smile.

"I'm proud of you no matter what, but if you can have a few mouthfuls I'd be even happier."

I nod, picking up the sandwich and taking tiny bites, at first it tastes like ash and I'm tempted to spit it out, but after a few seconds I groan at how delicious it is. "It's good." I say, taking one last mouthful and swigging half a bottle of water after.

"Yeah? Let's make a deal, for every lunch you have something to eat, not just some lettuce or some shit, but an actual lunch, I'll swear off cigarettes for a week."

I gasp at Eddie's deal, I know he smokes a lot anyway so this would be beneficial to us both, and this way we can both help each other out. I nod, holding out my hand as Eddie shakes it, pressing a kiss to the back of it after.

"Alright, wanna head back to school or should we go do something fun?" Eddie teases.

I roll my eyes but tell him to drive to the arcade anyway.