Mother Earth // Bellamy Blake

Lock Up • 46

I flipped through pages in the books around the room while we waited. Most of these were my mom's from teaching. They brought good memories of her reading them to me, not sad ones.

"I'm so sorry about your mom, Kota. I never got a chance to tell you that," Clarke said to me after a while of silence.

"Don't be," I replied without looking at her. "I don't think she would have been able to handle what's going on right now. She always spoke highly of Pike and his intellect. She'd be devastated by his actions." Every time I thought about what they did to that army, I felt sick.

Clarke said nothing in return and we waited in silence for a bit longer. That was until the door opened and Octavia entered with Bellamy. He looked stunned to see Clarke and I in here together. Bear had trotted up to him, I watched as Bellamy lightly patted his head without taking his eyes off of us.

Octavia nodded towards me then left the room, shutting the door behind her.

"What are you doing here Clarke? You chose the grounders over your own people and now you decide to show up. You turned your back on us," Bellamy started firing. I stayed quiet because this wasn't my fight. Clarke did the right thing in choosing to stay in Polis, but it really did hurt Bellamy that we went there to rescue her and she didn't come home with us.

"Ice Nation paid the price for what they did to Mount Weather. It's over," Clarke shot back.

Bellamy scoffed at her, "why do you get to decide it's over?"

"We did our part," Clarke stated lightly. "The Ice Queen is dead."

Bellamy stepped forward to her, I think he just completely forgot I was in the room.

"Why are you really here?" He questioned.

"If Arkadia doesn't make things right, Lexa and the twelve clans will wipe you out. Don't tell me war is what you want," Clarke explained.

"You left us Clarke. People died here when you were in charge. You were going to let a bomb drop on my sister! You led me to think we could listen to them, then grounders blew up Mount Weather killing our people! People that trusted me!" Bellamy's voice rose as his tears welled up. He left Clarke speechless. Bellamy was right too about what Clarke had done, but following Pike wasn't going to fix any of this.

"I'm sorry Bellamy," Clarke finally spoke. "I'm sorry I left."

Bellamy crouched in front of her, grabbing her hands in his as he said, "I'm sorry too."

I saw him quickly pull out handcuffs and tighten one end around Clarke's wrist and secured the other end to the table.

I got up at this point, "what the fuck are you doing?"

I tried to dig my hands into Bellamy's pockets to hopefully find the key to the cuffs. Bellamy grabbed my wrists to take them out of his jacket. He picked me up and threw my body over his shoulder against my will.

"Bellamy put me down!" I yelled while trying to get off.

"I'm sorry. I can't," he said as he carried me out of the room. I stopped struggling against his grip. He wasn't going to put me down and I wasn't going to hurt him to get out of it.

I looked around as he was leading me to a quieter part of the Ark. My heart sunk when I saw where he was taking me. He set me down in a small room that had no privacy.

Bellamy closed the gated door behind him after putting me down, probably so I wouldn't run out. I didn't notice I was crying until right now. When he turned to face me, I could tell he was upset he had made me feel like this.

"So you're just going to lock me up in here forever?" My voice wasn't angry, it was sad.

Bellamy stepped to me and gently placed his hands around my face, wiping my continuous tears with his thumbs.

"Just until this is finished. I told you before, I'm not losing you again," he stated. He had tears falling too and it showed in his voice. "If you go against Pike, I can't stop what he'd do to you. You already went against him bringing Clarke here and not reporting it. I need you safe no matter how I have to do it."

"This is not the way to protect me Bellamy," I said shakily. "You can't leave me in here."

"I need you safe," he repeated and pressed his lips onto my forehead. "I can't let anything happen to you."

"Anything that happens to me is because you chose to side with that man," I whispered back to him. "He got to you Bellamy. You would have never gone out there and killed all those people if he wasn't talking in your ear."

"The grounders took so many of our lives, Kota. I'm not going to let that happen anymore," Bellamy tried to defend.

I stepped back from his figure, I couldn't hear anymore of Pike's propaganda pouring out my Bellamy's mouth.

"I have to go," Bellamy stated reluctantly. "I'll be back with some food."

I watched him leave and lock the gated door behind him. The tears never stopped spilling until I finally laid down.

—

I was in here for almost three days. I fell into a really dark place. I had no motivation to eat and I had hardly slept. All I could do was think and cuddle Bear.

Miller came by three times a day to take Bear outside and update me on anything going on. I started to not care what he said about whatever was happening out there after he told me that Clarke and Octavia got out. There was no point if I was stuck in here.

I thought about asking Miller to just let me out because he would, but I couldn't put him in danger for doing something like that for me.

I didn't turn from my position on the mattress where I was facing the wall when I heard the door unlock and open. I knew it was Bellamy because he was the only one besides Miller who ever entered. He comes in to bring me food multiple times a day or to just try and talk to me, but I haven't said a word to him since he put me in here.

I heard him replace my old full plate of food with a new one. I could feel his eyes looking at me.

"Kota, please eat something," he begged. I still couldn't find the energy to say anything to him. "You've barely eaten in three days."

I could feel the bed sink down from him taking a seat. He grabbed my shoulder to turn me over gently. When we caught each other's eyes, he looked pained at the sight of me.

"You haven't been sleeping?" He asked, hoping to get an answer out of me. I assumed I had dark circles around my eyes from the lack of sleep. "I have to go out for a few hours, Miller will bring you more food when he comes to take Bear out. Please sleep."

I kept my glare on him, I know he felt horrible about doing this to me but I wanted him to hate himself for it. He thought he was protecting me, but it was actually breaking me.

When I wouldn't talk to him, he gave up. He stood from the bed and walked out of the door once again.